The wheel is fast, and it never stops. There are many thoughts that are racing, some at the same time, some competing with each other.
Negative self talk always comes in first, with impending doom coming second.
Laying in bed trying to sleep, the thoughts don’t creep, they gyrate. Aggressively, impulsively, gyrate.
You can try to fight it, “you’re amazing, you’re awesome, don’t let these thoughts win”
But in the end the wheel never stops.
When will I learn, the wheel doesn’t ask for permission.
It just spins.
Millions of decades ago,
ancient humankind had one purpose in life:
to find prey
every day,
a stomach that stayed full
until the next breath,
until the last breath.
Ideas stormed,
things evolved,
brains grew creative,
and eventually, we were called the smartest species on Earth.
Here we are, humans of today’s bin,
seeing the air around us
and wondering:
is this how it has always been?
This very planet once had souls whose purpose was big, yet small.
"Laughter, smiles — that's all we want."
However, today's baby is born with a paper and pen.
They start writing down desires, one after another, until the last day.
And boom — the list has already crossed a thousand before the age of ten.
From one corner of the world come screams for money and hymns,
while from another come cries for love.
This world is now full of deafening screams.
People are becoming breathless, chasing empty dreams.
A smile, evoked by ninety-nine reasons,
vanishes because of one statement.
The heart is weak,
the brain dominates.
It's the new normal.
The 8 billion pockets are getting heavy,
but are we ready?
you hurt me, yet I remain calm
you try to kill me, yet I remain calm
but why does it hurt
when I need to say goodbye?
recovery is the winner
yet it feels in disguise
because I just can’t believe
I deserve to survive
I never realized what jail meant when I was young
prison’s unhappy stay is much longer, my hands are wrung
I was tired of these walls before I was placed, it’s been years now
have lost track of friends and family, my day’s excitement? Chow
from this window I see very little, a tree I think is oak
I have shouted at occasional people, most have not spoke
there is a robin that hops around a bit, of course she is free
Much better life she has than little old sad me.
Yesterday I saw a woman in a business suit walk by.
She did not glance my way, or even try.
She looks like the woman I wish I had met before I did wrong.
I lie in this bunk, singing a poor me song.
My days are dreary, there is no fresh air to talk about.
They say they’ll let me have a break, but I am rarely out.
Prison is a horrible experience I wish on no one, not even an enemy.
The sadness and loneliness make me wish to be set free.
I'm sitting alone, with people around,
Seeking some relief, I cry aloud;
Yet nobody hears me.
They laugh, voices fill the air;
I feel small, I feel bare,
Yet nobody feels me.
Now silence falls and shadows grow,
Heads go down, staring at the floor,
Yet nobody sees me.
You were the one kept me up all night
always made me feel so right
times have changed
I won't play your waiting game
you were unkind if you'd only see
willing to blame it all on me
those days are gone
now I know where I went wrong
you were my all if you only knew
I was ready to bet everything on you
times aren't the same
I won't make that mistake again
don't need more disappointments
no unhappy endings
no more disillusions
or broken heart that needs mending
you were so cruel made a fool of me
it was you who set me free
time moves on
now I know where I belong
and you're like a ghost to me now
ever since we've been apart
haunting the hallways
of this empty house I call my heart
When is it going to be sunny again?
It's been cloudy for the past couple of weeks.
All grey and stuff.
Yknow I keep waiting for there to be a bunch of storms,
With all the thunder, and lightning and whatnot, but...
It's just been...grey.
It's not like the sun is gone;
Scientifically it can't go anywhere,
I know that.
Away at night, maybe, but it still exists.
Hiding.
Sometimes a little patch will poke through.
Just saying "Hey I'm still here!!", yknow.
"Don't forget me!!"
It's so easy to forget though.
Cause it's been cloudy for so long.
And sometimes I think I'm all alone;
That it's just me under this sky.
But I know everyone on campus looks up to the same clouds.
The same grey field.
I really miss the sunshine.
Unhappy lunch
I could sense as soon as we entered
the restaurant that was a family run business
there had been a turmoil in the kitchen
the servers were father and daughter who
normally worked well together, but to day he
was in the kitchen, his daughter said, when
I asked
There were still many costumers, but they
kept a low profile and spoke subdual when
eating, we had entered a war zone
when our food came it was served on a dish
where my meat was grey like it had been
boiled, fries were uneven remanded of sailor
who had jut made ashore from a sinking ship
falling exhausted to the ground, and the
fried egg had been killed into a hard shell
However the salat, possible made before the
civil war, was good
Needless to say I refused to eat the served
my wife more skilled in diplomatic niceness
told the girl server to pack the food to take home
that I for some reason was not hungry
the lesson is, do not upset chefs in their kitchen
no more porch railings
mud daubers are unhappy
seasonal home gone
When someone disrespect you
Don't get easily react and easily hurt
It's a reflection of their own character
It's about them than it's about you
Try not to take it as personal attack
Don't let get under your skin
Only people who are not happy themselves
Are mean to other people.
You go to bed unhappy,
in a separate room I also am unhappy.
Neither of us know why.
We worry too much
about each other's unhappiness.
Maybe we should talk less,
unhappiness always starts as a word
in our heads.
I will give you a five,
if you would swallow this sharp knife.
As excruciating as it may feel,
it describes my life.
Hurt,sorrow,and failure
are the paints of my little globe.
It should have been bright
but it gives out no light.
In my little world, it is so dim,since
daily pain boils up to the rim.
In an invisible body of glass,
Where the brain feels it should strike.
The eyes have its frequent eye wash.
The mouth obliged to keep silent.
The heart feels siffened in a cage of its own.
Happiness tries to creep in, overtaken by sadness.
Depression buries energy and strength.
Living is not a favourite word anymore.
Lies are being exalted, truth is abased.
Dishonesty seems like a culture.
Compliments is toxic, insult is the antidote
Communication is a catastrophy.
Love is a word that don't exist
Appreciation is nameless.
Support agrees with credit in good situation.
Not bad situation.
Um, you stand alone.
The reflection in the water of the woman
Was not pleasing; even to herself she looked
Hard.
Frown marks were etched deep; two lacerations
Between her black unruly brows.
Thin lips clamped together in a downward Arc
Showed her disappointment in life; her dissatisfaction.
She didn’t want to go on; She didn’t want to go home.
Her reflection said “I bet you haven’t got the guts to get in like Ophelia did.”
The woman’s eyes narrowed; she actually hated her reflection.
She took off her green shawl and lay it neatly on the green grass beside the still pond.
The unhappy woman stepped into the pond;
She sunk slowly down through her own reflection.
She had fallen for her own reverse psychology.
And now she is no more.
There once was a charming young chap,
who sat on a lovely girl's lap.
When she saw his great lust,
she was filled with disgust,
and fervently gave him a slap!
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