Ted Poems | Examples

Premium Member TED THE OLD POET

TED THE OLD POET*
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
with ink-stained hands, Ted conjures up verses
with verses soft, tears he sheds
of dreams past and paths he tread
compassion for himself spreads

*Note:poem originally written and submitted to Poetry Soup, June 25. I later deleted it. This is my original poem.
Form: Englyn

Premium Member Tequila Ted Talk

Lit up like a Christmas tree 
Is papa after his festive drink
He’s a funny one
Can’t hold his tongue
Dances and he sings

Words that make no sense
Long winded when he’s bent
He gives a Ted Talk
About how to stand tall
And falls on his rear end

Despite his huge blue pride
He knew too drunk to drive
In his sloppy stupor
He calls an Uber
Goes home to angry wife
Form: Limerick


The Abuse Of Sylvia Plyth By Poet Husband Ted Hughes

In her frail hands, she held the flame,
A flicker bright, yet bound to fade—
Her words, like stars, her heart aflame,
Her soul, a scarred and shadowed glade.

Beneath the weight of unseen chains,
She sang her sorrow, soft and low,
While in his eyes were cold remains
Of love long buried in the snow.

He turned from her, a shadow cast,
A silent specter, dark and near,
While each small wound became her last,
Her tender voice gave way to fear.

Yet still she wrote, with trembling pen,
A warrior lost, but fighting still,
Each verse, a scream of might, and then
A wish to bend the world to will.

But oh, his silence crushed her soul,
His hands withheld both love and light,
And in the end, she paid the toll—
Her flame was lost into the night.

Premium Member Ted wants a Knapsack not a Backpack

Mommy, I do not want a backpack
I want a polka-dotted red knapsack
this annoyed Ted’s father, big Max
All kinds of conformity this child lacks

Knapsacks do not have zippers Ted said.
I don’t want a backpack, he yelled from his bed.
Little compartments are marvelous said Uncle Ed.
I will take a knapsack or nothing, screamed little Ted.

You have a problem, Grandma Martin said to Big Max.
He makes such a big deal about a backpack!
If it’s a knapsack he wants we can do that, Grandma Martin.
We only have a day and a half until he goes to kindergarten.
Form: Rhyme

Ted

Ted sure needs to use the porter loo
Ted really does need to do a poo
He banged on the door
Could not wait any more
Ted farted so hard the porta loo flew
Form: Limerick


Premium Member Worshipful Master Ted Is Tense

worshipful master’s fez kept slipping off his head.
he was irritated and blamed the trumpet flower.
tittering faeries kept him irritated, this honored Ted.
Ted sat in their bouquet, annoyed by their power.

they had him all confused and curiously tense.
with their girly charms and their faerie ways.
he sat among their giggling in masculine suspense.
wondering what they had in mind for him these days.

smiling smirking faeries are first fun, but they sometimes turn.
his grandpa found out when his heart was captured by one.
gramps lives a life of toil and work, driven hard by his wife Fern.
a faerie who keeps him busy while she flies off and has the fun.
Form: Rhyme

Why Ted Is Slimmer

Don’t you know why Ted is slimmer?
His eyes no more with hopes glimmer:
Had long swum in pools with shimmer,
As long in frustration swimmer;
Ted would not bear Todd’s New Tipper
Plus dreams of making ‘A Shipper!’…

But one’s knowledge of life deeper,
One no more, in spirit, Sleeper,
Entrance one blocks against Creeper
And proves Goodwill Lover Keeper…

Now, you know why Ted is slimmer
And walrus moustache not trimmer:
Chances of making it dimmer,
One gets slimmer and face grimmer!
Form: Rhyme

He Does Not Want To Change

He does not want to change
And it is very strange:
Ted a few understand 
Like one does one’s left hand:
Ted who would queerly stand,
As though it is more grand
Than taking up Sofa
That makes rumps less suffer …

Ted with his own notion
Of an Ideal Nation:
“What she can do for you
Starting with Things to Chew!”

Ted won’t think of a change
With all things out of range.
Form: Rhyme

To Ted and Debbie

A brother and sister should
always be friends,
One for the other, who
Cares and defends.

A brother and sister should
always be kind,
Love one another,
Lives intertwined.

A brother and sister should
always be there,
To love and to cherish, to
show that you care.

A brother and sister should
always be brave,
Together forever, cradle
to grave.

Count your blessings,
Love each other a ton,
Someday, too soon,
there will only be one.
Form: Rhyme

Premium Member Ted

seeking warmth of blanket
and sun, Minnesota coated
with snow and ice. cockapoo
paws the window, stretches

near the door…raucous barks
at footfall on the front porch.
father of his master, a stranger
not yet accepted into the pack.

12/23/2021
dog

Premium Member She Fools Ted

She is introverted the extrovert said.
Not knowing at all; his first name was Ted.
Their weird observation filled me with dread.
I knew Ted did not see what was up ahead.

Please pay extra attention to her, I pled.
I have known her since my childhood homestead.
She’ll be a non-talker ‘til after you’re wed.
Could tell by his face I should now lightly tread.

He was a stubborn one and in lover, our man Ted.
And she was ultra-gorgeous tonight, dressed up in red.
They were married at Christmas, on a giant sleigh sled.
Beside their parents, who on both sides are rather well fed.

She started talking upon their wedding night bed.
Amusing his two peeping cousins, Fred and Ole Ed.
Her incessant talking for sixty years hurt his head.
So he built himself his own fabulous man shed.

Stayed there as long as he could ‘til he was long dead.
Her constant need for attention was never fully fed.
Weird how their physical attraction easily led
To a life where she had totally fooled our own little Ted.
Form: Monorhyme

Premium Member Why Ted Doesn'T Love Lucy - Bawdy Warning

Ted suffers from 'Looseheel Ball'
It’s driving him clean up the wall
He’s got such an itch
It’s making him twitch
He’s begging the doctor to call

The medic said oh dearie me
This condition I rarely see
Your balls badly twisted
Teds scared eyes soon misted
When  doc says you need surgery

Doc bundles Ted onto the table
and borrows a knife from Aunt Mable
This won’t hurt a bit…
He gives ball a snip
Ted will rise again when he’s able


10/10/21
Form: Limerick

Premium Member Her First Date With Ted

I would give an arm and a leg to see him, she said.
She was going to meet a new guy by name of Ted.
Only time will tell if things will turn out okay.
I am weak as a kitten, I heard my friend say.

At the end of the date she had the time of her life.
She expected this guy Ted to make her his wife.
I said, I hope you did not speak of your crazy short leg.
No, she nodded. I avoided that like the plague.

I took the tiger by the tail, she told me smugly.
Thought outside the box, called myself May Puggly.
There are plenty of fish in the sea, I reminded her.
Just in case the expected outcome did not occur.

It is as plain as the nose on my face she said later.
He was not much of a man, a notorious dater.
He is now as dead as a doornail me, that hack!
Was she actually the pot calling the kettle black?

Time sure did fly when I was having fun.
But now that he has stood me up, this creep had better run!
Form: Rhyme

Premium Member Os Ted Briggs

Floating, adrift in icy water; like discarded driftwood
(his Commander, Warrand, bravely stepped aside to let him pass)
the sole survivor so thought Ted; of the proud and mighty Hood.
Then came Bill, and Bob, three, from one thousand four hundred eighteen
ripped and torn apart from Admirals to seamen second class.
Brave souls all, who crossed the bar that day, a crew, a brotherhood
through a flaw in Hood's design. They knew; The Royal Navy brass.




Just before 06:00 on 24th May 1941, HMS Hood was struck by several German shells, exploded, and sank within 3 minutes, with the loss of all but three of her crew of 1418; Midshipman William Dundas, Able Seaman Bob Tilburn, and Ordinary Signalman Ted Briggs. The British Admiralty was aware of her vulnerable deck armour
 
Julyme Poetry Contest
Sponsored by: William Kekaula Placed 3rd. 
Date wrote: 23-July-2021
Form: Rhyme

Premium Member A Mouse Named Ted He Whom Ate a Loaf of Bread-

There was a mouse named Ted
In kitchen found a loaf of bread
But during a break
It made a mistake
got inside Oh, yumderful for Ted



6/3/21
Written words by James Edward Lee Sr. 2021©
Form: Limerick

Related Poems

Get a Premium Membership
Get more exposure for your poetry and more features with a Premium Membership.
Book: Radiant Verses: A Journey Through Inspiring Poetry

Member Area

My Admin
Profile and Settings
Edit My Poems
Edit My Quotes
Edit My Short Stories
Edit My Articles
My Comments Inboxes
My Comments Outboxes
Soup Mail
Poetry Contests
Contest Results/Status
Followers
Poems of Poets I Follow
Friend Builder

Soup Social

Poetry Forum
New/Upcoming Features
The Wall
Soup Facebook Page
Who is Online
Link to Us

Member Poems

Poems - Top 100 New
Poems - Top 100 All-Time
Poems - Best
Poems - by Topic
Poems - New (All)
Poems - New (PM)
Poems - New by Poet
Poems - Read
Poems - Unread

Member Poets

Poets - Best New
Poets - New
Poets - Top 100 Most Poems
Poets - Top 100 Most Poems Recent
Poets - Top 100 Community
Poets - Top 100 Contest

Famous Poems

Famous Poems - African American
Famous Poems - Best
Famous Poems - Classical
Famous Poems - English
Famous Poems - Haiku
Famous Poems - Love
Famous Poems - Short
Famous Poems - Top 100

Famous Poets

Famous Poets - Living
Famous Poets - Most Popular
Famous Poets - Top 100
Famous Poets - Best
Famous Poets - Women
Famous Poets - African American
Famous Poets - Beat
Famous Poets - Cinquain
Famous Poets - Classical
Famous Poets - English
Famous Poets - Haiku
Famous Poets - Hindi
Famous Poets - Jewish
Famous Poets - Love
Famous Poets - Metaphysical
Famous Poets - Modern
Famous Poets - Punjabi
Famous Poets - Romantic
Famous Poets - Spanish
Famous Poets - Suicidal
Famous Poets - Urdu
Famous Poets - War

Poetry Resources

Anagrams
Bible
Book Store
Character Counter
Cliché Finder
Poetry Clichés
Common Words
Copyright Information
Grammar
Grammar Checker
Homonym
Homophones
How to Write a Poem
Lyrics
Love Poem Generator
New Poetic Forms
Plagiarism Checker
Poetry Art
Publishing
Random Word Generator
Spell Checker
Store
What is Good Poetry?
Word Counter
Hide Ad