No Flag on the Hill
He woke to the hiss of burning plastic
a child's shoe, half-melted in the road.
Something like singing came from the mosque,
but it was only wind
through broken glass.
The birds left weeks ago.
Even the dogs are quiet now.
A rusted swing creaks in a schoolyard
where no one plays anymore.
A mother once painted the front gate blue.
Now it’s ash and wire.
Someone drew a border
right through our kitchen tiles.
They boil rice with rainwater and clove,
eat in silence.
Outside, a drone's red eye
blinks, blinks, blinks
and does not blink away.
In Secret Caverns, we harken to the darkness.
Our headlamps’ shut off, we are anywhere,
we are everywhere, it doesn’t matter where.
No matches, no breeze, no breath to strike
up the light, no moon, no sun, no shuffling.
Absolutely still - our souls, our conscience,
what disturbs the ash of our ultimate destiny.
No one dares to whisper in this golden cage.
The ages pass by, primordials stir, Jesus is
still in his wrappings. My heart, subdued, like
earplugs in their caves. My eyes, wide open,
stand at attention, to retain the inner light.
I stand in the lake, my life jacket does not glow;
however I grow in sensation; I float upright.
We are the rests between notes. We dote on
the inky calm, not a mere closure of lids; liars,
those pair of skin divers, that blink away shine.
Sans shadows, peaking at the sublimity of time.
Oh dear ! You are better off
I’m not a smiling doll
to play with you
Don’t stain me
with your fingers and words
I’m possessed by a holy evil
Don’t yell my dear !
Even as an embryo
the world knows -
I’m a witch
I didn’t bewitch you
Don’t think too highly of yourself
You were a nomad
who lost your way
in my fog of love
You want to burn me alive ?
Do you think you can ?
Oh dear ! Rub your eyes ,
blink away the fog
I’m toned like soot and
smell like smoke
Where is it !?
I miss the spark in your eyes
Dear , come at me !
Set the pyre alight, I crave flames
The sizzle of flesh and bones
turning into ashes
Never leaves me soulless
Oh dear ! I love you ,
Do you dare take me -
as your woman anew ?!
Please leave behind a candle born
to blink away dark of night..
as stars give way to distant morn,
please leave behind a candle born.
Though night voices call out forlorn,
and timid few choose garish light..
please leave behind a candle born-
to blink away dark of night.
no one told me it would hurt like this.
like sandpaper scraping through my veins.
head pounding, body aching,
tied and bound with chains.
they never explained the pain I'd feel
or the way my body would shut down.
straining against a sea full of destructive things
and I fear that I might drown.
I don't think I can continue
this is far too much to bear
I crave the habits that numbed the pain
that pulled me out of this despair.
the pills used to set me free,
and I'd drink until I slept
now reality beats me down
the title of sobriety is the only thing I've kept
I miss the times I couldn't feel
the times I can't remember
I don't want to feel this way
just a blink away from a bender
being sober feels like torture
I need the drug-induced bliss
I know this is what's best for me
but no one told me it would hurt like this.
k.s.<3
Strolling down a bustling road full smiling of people
A vast array of hues bursting forth to greet the eye of the beholder;
Music cascades from the various shops and one of the passing cars
Laughter pleasantly warms the chilled air.
Without warning the pull of gravity multiplies and both hands slap the pavement;
Looking up, time slows to thick and syrupy consistency
The music is now all but gone and voices are distant as if underwater
Stomach dropping, insides are replaced by complete emptiness.
The concrete liquifies and rises rapidly over wrists and elbows
Before able to push off rock bottom, the surface becomes the sky
The temperature drops and limbs solidify as heavy as lead
Lungs begin to burn as fingers claw upwards.
A scream of anger tears from the lips,
Rapidly boiling the water and the streams of bubbles blind;
From the steam, tongues of flame lick from the fingers
Tar black smoke sears both mouth and nose.
The eyes blink away the smoke to reveal the very same street
But the colors now faded and dull,
Looking wildly around people still laugh and walk on by
As if nothing happened.
Cluster, clan, hanging bunch of grapes
- bustling collection children I dreamed
- Far from rationale, imagination run wild
- Adult life ridicules, idea is far less esteemed
When I babysat, pretended they were mine
- even the Asian one. Try to stop my stories!
- Wanted to be seen at sixteen as their mother
- Saw caregiving and fun sharer as ultimate glory
Perhaps a great majority of girls feel the same
- playing with dolls, structured, serious business
- But of course, options are much more enlightening
- High valued career compared to the longing within us
Being tied to a community, sweet trip indeed!
- commitment delivered, rewarded for decades
- Blink away your tears, perfection, I'm always here
- Each Mother knows her gratitude returned in spades
11th November
GLACIAL
Scent of lilies.
His pain over, mine just begun.
I caressed those hands, gifted, loving.
Kissed his waxen brow.
A blink away from the dying sun,
the ignition key trembled.
I half-expected to waken,
clasped in his arms. Soothed
back to life, on the mourning air.
Our silent house stood strong,
and healthy,
ticking away lonely hours and empty nights.
While I flinched from the glacial steppes,
of our marital bed.
DECIMA WRAXALL
Wildfire season - I inhale, and choke
On fiery air, try to blink away haze
But all the sunlight is full of smoke
Drizzling embers fall in a burning dose
Like stealthy predators, they come too close
Swallowing the land in a scarlet blaze
Leaving us homeless and broke
(this is a repost from a poem of mine from 2018 - I reposted it because the county in Oregon where I live is currently under a level 2 evacuation, which means 'be ready to leave on a moment's notice' - my niece and her family already evacuated. So this is more resonant to me today then when I first wrote it~)
Blink
A year is gone
Cough
Your toddler is getting married
Yawn
You are in a nursing home
Yes
It is that fast.
Tomorrow's just
a blink away.
And, yesterday
was once today.
Time moves on
in spite of all.
Where, once was spring
has now turned fall.
And, seldom does
youth understand,
What age has seen
pass through it's hand.
Eventually,
we all do learn,
With time comes change
and tables turn.
Written by,
Sheri Lynne Evans
September 2000
Look into my eyes
See the humanity inside
See where beauty resides
See them blue, green or brown
See them smile or frown
Look into my eyes
In my eyes the lies can’t hide
The tears glitter before they slide
My eyes narrowed to recognize
My eyes widen when terrified
Look into my eyes
Even though I lost my sight
My eyes show the imagination in my mind
I might be staring into nothingness
But my eyes see a million images
Look into my eyes
See your reflection on the pupil
See yourself from my point of view
See me blink away your doubts
See me beam a gaze of trust
Look into my eyes
They will shrunken your world view
Give you a human mirror image
They will beam an immediate truth
An intimate feedback about you
The bathroom lacks your spare change scattered,
and my bank account is no longer flattered.
Your socks are no longer sprawled on the floor,
but everyday entails a greater chore.
There's certainly far fewer dishes to scrub,
but there's no companion to enjoy my grub.
I'm no longer someone's personal maid,
but the lack of your traffic makes me afraid.
The covers are tucked on your side of the bed,
but fluffing the comforter is a simple dread.
The satin sheets no longer unfold you,
and this beating breast has no chest to mold to.
A cabinet drawer hangs, and my bouquet is bent.
As I weep, the dripping sink seems to lament.
If you're with the Holiest, and only know bliss,
I wonder if you're oblivious, or you witness this.
If the latter, is your perspective so much greater,
knowing I'm a blink away from the Creator?
By the grace of the Savior, I wait for your return,
when these eerie ashes will leap from your urn.
Wildfire season - I inhale, and choke
On fiery air, try to blink away haze
But all the sunlight is full of smoke
Drizzling embers fall in a burning dose
Like stealthy predators, they come too close
Swallowing the land in a scarlet blaze
Leaving us homeless and broke
To rebuild, we are left on our own
The red ink of insurance protects only their greed
They cynically say we should have known
As an 'act of God' they don't cover
It is on our shoulders to recover
Their profit more precious than our need
But we are not beaten; tenacity is home-grown.
8/15/18
The truth of the matter,
and what matters I ponder
a blink away from escape
lost to a timeless lucid state
prehaps timeless upon timeless
though not to be remembered
but I have felt and seen before
How quick do i forget?
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