Best Yacht Poems

I went fishing last week with a banker
On an impressive one hundred foot yacht
But when I joked and called it a tanker
I fathomed my real big fat mouth was caught

I threw out my line, hooked one, and yanked her
But it snapped my feeble rod like...

Continue reading...

I’d extend an invitation
to all in the congregation
through this speech of inspiration
which is quite a compilation
yet I expect no adulation
and no gest of adoration
for in my own estimation
it’s a trifle occupation
clearing out the obfuscation
of a simple predication
o’er the course of this oration
through the rhyme of...

Continue reading...

bayboats purse seine whey
journey yearlong gay
laddy inured dry up
haughty yachty yea
 
mildred mayhem dewlap
naughty jaunty jay
sons caught in car capers
haughty yachty yea

vicar baking in butterfat
orphan boy screwed in larder
bluejay frollic jane
and a haughty yachty yea
 
bombs in bay bombard
dickson singsick cockpit
french chicks s’envoient en l'air*
oh...

Continue reading...

LET'S CHARTER A YACHT AND GO WHERE IT'S HOT
AND PEOPLE ARE NOT IN THE WAY
WE'LL START OFF IN GREECE WITH CHAMPAGNE AND CASIS
THEN SAIL UP TO NICE, ST. TROPEZ
AND IF MISTRAL SHOULD BLOW WE'LL JUST GO BELOW
AND DO WHAT'S APPROPOS BELOW DECK
THEN DINGHY ASHORE OR...

Continue reading...

The ship is always loaded
With misty looking folks
Who fill the decks and cabins
Wrapped in dreamers’ cloaks

No one lies too far 
Or near the closest sleeper
And being all together
Just helps the dreams go deeper

Waves lap in steady rhythm 
Against the wooden sides
Winds blow with gentle coolness
Matching...

Continue reading...

She sat at her table
And had a sip of her lemonade
Wishing she could be out there dancing
How she loved to dance
Her brother and his wife 
Were busy chatting with some friends
Who had stopped at the table to catch up
And she, likewise, was busy
She was busy...

Continue reading...

She couldn’t believe he was real
But there he was…
Chatting away with someone
Who was from his realm
Modern day aristocracy
The clothes, the very air around them
Screamed of wealth
Power
She squirmed in her seat
Her discomfort mounting
Feeling out of place
But what caught her eye
Wasn’t any of the trappings
No!
He was the...

Continue reading...

A tom bell version of "The Rubaiyat of Omar Khayyam";
(In hopes of enticing our beloved Ruby Metzger back to Soup)

Omar K. always
had his way...

Multi-millions
from Arab oil,
He sat back
and self-pampered
He'd never
had to toil...

Money bought
his every whim
Saw an electric razor
that satisfied him

Bought the company,
Went on TV,
to tell...

Continue reading...

They walked up to the entrance
And he followed her up the stairs
Stopping a few stairs below her
She turned to face him, and found herself
Level with his blue eyes
He had both hands in his pockets
And now she realized that gesture for what it was
An attempt to...

Continue reading...

A

                                      Small

      ...

Continue reading...

It bled belly up 
my mother-in-law’s 
  ‘yach-et’

Delirious
I forgot to
  bury the hatch-et...

Continue reading...

With a deliberate shake of her long back curls
She strode right past him
Not acknowledging his smile
Exuding indifference 
And a certain air of pride

“Could you please tell me what things
are suitable for vegetarians?”
She asked the attendants at the table
A mellow voice to her left answered
“I can...

Continue reading...

“Don’t worry,” he told her brother
“I will make sure she gets home safely.”
With a firm handshake
It was a done deal
He would be true to his word
It was now a matter of honor

They were off towards the entrance of the club
Maybe he’d just get one of...

Continue reading...

Come sail with me once more dear friends, to ply the winds to comply.
To hoist the sails, pull on the sheets, to steer the yacht driving through waves.
Together, we make a great team, tackling and taming riled wild seas....

Continue reading...

Let’s sail away to Acapella,
A celebrity haunt owned by Penn and Teller.
I shall act as your prince, you’ll be Cinderella
When we’re sat on a beach in Acapella.

It’s not as sexy as Cannes or as dowdy as Rhyl
But their choirs and ensembles will give you a...

Continue reading...