“Stage Fright”
Where are my lights?
My camera?
My action?
It's not supposed to be like this!
I trained long enough for the stage,
for stardom.
I know I did.
I just know what I did.
I was surrounded by the actors and stars.
I walked the red carpet in dresses from Mars.
I went from a saddle with handlebars
to a drug-induced mansion and flying cars.
From there on the platform I waved,
I smiled.
I said, “Look at me now!”
Wait! Don't run!
I used my hysteria to calm the crowd.
And from behind my back
I drew my gun.
I said, “Hey! Watch me juggle!"
Then I drooled. I frothed.
I failed all my fans today.
I really didn't want to,
But I practiced till I puked...
and then I blew them all away.
(say your lines)
(you can do it)
~{whoosh--->}
I have to push myself outside
For I am an introvert
I don’t swell with purple pride
Inside not how I work
I’m self sufficient near to a flaw
Yet I crave the audience and stage
My green gifts are red and raw
Yet I will drag them in the light of day
Easily I practice my pink piece
A poem I wrote called seeds
I listen to the ruby recording
Hoping to perfect purple poetry
I know I will get a chill
Just before the presentation
But I must create my thrill
In meeting yellow anticipation
I’m trying to step out my comfort zone
Which is in my little homemade box
I control the timing of metronome
And only death should dare me stop
Say a little prayer for me please
That I keep my cranberry courage
That I am calming as I speak
That light or dark I will encourage
My sleep stages are Moon phases combing
my limbic system, where I touch electric chords
singing my survival.
The words I compose dwell in privacy.
I blow the candles out after they are written.
And they wait, poised to be expressed.
But like a child in a nightmare,
I am naked before my audience.
My own words belong to someone else.
My lips move out of sync with my thoughts.
A.I. writes a better imitation of my poems.
It will speak its version of me,
parrot its empty parody of me.
You’ll enjoy its rendering of me
far better than me.
Like the first motion pictures,
The audience fears the A.I. train
will mow them down.
Magical thinking about flickering
images on a wall enlisted the same
primal fears as flickering algorithmic
texts.
But no phases of the Moon touch
them. No electric chords will sing, and
no privacy in candlelight is felt
in them.
Instead, we will forget that A.I.
was ever scary.
We will watch it mimic life
like reruns of
nearly forgotten movies.
Published: Caesura - Summer 2023
Do speakers sound articulate,
For ideas they’d freshly conceived
From the faintest flash just received?
Does pumped blood not circulate fast,
The steadied nerves later not last?
Rather a weak insulation
Of a feared circumlocution,
Left ajar a stammering door
Begging for Great Orator’s jaw!
Its not helped by physical might
What is a psychology’s fight
Great panic and its twin stage fright
Before an audience, mind in flight
Sure it had met The Superior
That deserved nothing inferior…
So back you go to drawing board!
Weapon: psychological sword!
the escape artist
his function is distraction
and only sorrow
On stage at last
Faces the audience ~
Her final gasp
Sweaty palms
And a nervous stomach
Getting up in front of a crowd.
Everyone staring
Waiting and listening
For me to speak out loud.
Butterfly sensation
My voice begins to crack
And the words begin to flow.
I speak and talk
The truth comes out
I stand firm in the glow.
Confidence appears
Fright and worry die
Others judge the sound.
Smiles and laughter
Thoughts achieved
Clapping hands abound.
Stage Fright
by Michael R. Burch
To be or not to be?
In the end Hamlet
opted for naught.
NOTE: I interpret Hamlet's famous "To be or not to be" soliloquy as a meditation on suicide. Hamlet considered death preferable to life, but agonized over "what dreams may come" in death's "undiscovered country." Hamlet hesitated to end his life because he feared what might lie beyond. Keywords/Tags: Hamlet, Shakespeare, Theater, Play, Literature, Act, Acting, Action, Exit, Farewell, Goodbye, Leaving, Stage Right, Stage Fright, Soliloquy, Suicide, Death, Undiscovered Country, Bourn, Bourne, Sleep, Sleeping, Eternal Rest, Dream, Dreams, Journey, Voyage
Why does this light inside scare me?
I'll lock it down tight in the hopes to spare me
the separation.
I want to live from a higher vibration,
revelation and wonder,
but fear of isolation drags me under,
steals my thunder and dims the glow.
All this creation and nothing to show.
All those notes played just for the wind,
those shapes that stayed locked in my mind,
those words stuck between pages on bookshelves in sheds
or lost between faces so stuck in my head,
good as dead and going nowhere.
There's magic when you learn how to share,
when you don't care,
lay yourself bare and trust.
Tear down your walls and scream if you must
but scream it true
from the depths of what it means to be you,
step out from the queue and show it.
They can't do what you do and they know it
and they'll stop for a moment without even knowing
why they're touched so much by this love that you're showing.
Growing by giving, living by sharing,
loving by trusting and not caring
what the others may say.
Thoughts of this fade away when you just play
unafraid and unaware
of some deep recognition in their stare
of this shape, hitherto unseen
of a heart now open,
a dream within a dream.
Counting imaginary sheep
Hoping to persuade my mind to sleep
Anxious and terrified to step on stage, tomorrow,
Its three am and I'm already searching for courage
Fast forward freeze frame,
My stomach feels like there's a butterfly on flames,
Sweaty palms and salty saliva,
Really wishing I was only the receiver
Not the deliverer,
My alias is called out by the announcer,
But I pretend to be someone else, call me the bouncer,
Piercing eyes in curious skulls loiter,
Searching for this petrified poetic potter,
My soul gathers its last ounces of bravery,
I grace the lime light like I am abolishing slavery,
Testimony, that was a lame first impression ,
So I dice my conscience to amuse your expectations,
For charmed by your gaze you are my inspiration,
Liberation, transformation listen to this elaboration,
Without you there wouldn't be this lyrical respiration,
For my words are transportation,
Your longing hearts are my destination,
I am a citizen and you are my nation
My nourishment when I'm facing starvation,
I'm out. Standing ovation!
my feet aching, body shaking, knees weakening
when I get up front
I get attacked by my noble subconscious
my self esteem is lower than my toe print
I just hope it understands
that's ima stomp it down
In this big black abyss
ideas roam free n wild
my plot
I keep it discreet
the world aint ready for what my thoughts submerge
I consider myself a mental giant amongst my peers
the funny thing is, everything else around is up to scale
still a beginner, I'm at the bottom of my league
but I'm not worried, I cant be shook
coz I know I cant scale my way to the top
and maybe freefall
just to do it all over again
its addictive
I'm not different, yaul are the just the same
ima fine tuned automobile
with a heart of steel
It's true that we're all actors,
But the best of us don't know it;
The ones with glee and rage,
who aren't afraid to show it,
But some of us were born,
with consciences too small:
While watching others mourn,
we feel nothing at all.
Without a doubt, we're the worst people,
You'll never find us in a steeple.
Perhaps we'll live under your bed,
Or as the demons in your head.
Wherever we go, we bring dread,
And we don't care, because we're dead.
We're the ones who realize,
No man lives after he dies,
It makes us feel nigh dead inside,
Until the day that we have died.
What saves us from an early time,
Is finding others with like-minds,
But sometimes we only find one,
And good thoughts die, once they've gone.
We're the ones who hope surpasses,
When tears squeeze through our eyelashes.
Burning questions sear our tongues,
As we choke on smoke filled lungs,
Ever fearful to reach out,
Once someone has shown us doubt.
On the stage,
Lights are blaring,
Crowds in a rage,
Everyone is staring;
Eyes are watering,
Lip is quivering,
Knees are buckling,
Thoughts keep racing;
Will I mess up?
Will I pass out?
Will I throw up?
There’s so much doubt;
What were the notes?
What were the words?
I just might choke,
My memories a blur;
The crowd is waiting,
To hear my singing,
My heart is racing,
My head is ringing;
I open my mouth,
To begin the song,
The first not goes south,
I started all wrong;
I close my eyes,
I start again,
In my mind I
Think its time to win;
I sing the first note,
Right on key,
I open my eyes and
The crowd cheers for me;
There is now,
No more fear,
I take a bow while
They clap and cheer.
A candlelight
A moonlight
A romantic set
A single heart
Give me laughter
I promise a forever after,
An unforgettable evening
And loneliness will be forgotten
A broken promise
A stolen kiss
A forbidden romance
A last dance
I’ll be your partner
I'm a novice, you too a beginner
Holding your hand through the tango and the waltz
Through life's stage fright
A broken champagne bottle
A little hesitation in the middle
Love is fragile
Love is brittle
Let’s take it a step at a time
Our melody in harmony like a chime
In the journey of hearts
Let's trust in each others
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