Long Hilarious Poems
Long Hilarious Poems. Below are the most popular long Hilarious by PoetrySoup Members. You can search for long Hilarious poems by poem length and keyword.
Euthanasia. Laugh. Laugh. Euthanasia. Giggle. Giggle.
A wonderful subject for conversation in no circles.
And yet, here I am, laughing with my friend about it, at work.
“I think it hilarious that you think you have a daughter who
would put you out of your misery,” she says.
She is doubled over with laughter about it.
I stare at her.
She obviously did not hear me well.
You misunderstood me, I reply.
We have two daughters, who would not hesitate to take us both out, if we were miserable enough.”
She says “you are a hoot.”
Hoot or not, I know one thing for sure.
The other daughter would keep us alive on machines if only one eye was still blinking.
So I will warn the other two not to let her in on the plan.
Stillness is the source where creativity does arise,
and shades of images become alive.
Melodious ripples taken form,
synchronizing the dark with visions to be born.
The frequency of desire establishes all meaning,
some images turn into the right feeling.
That mystic gentle finger playing the tone,
on a half full glass to perform.
While the soul strings to the right chord,
and pure thoughts turn into the word.
Liberating the river of intellect,
making joyful notes of timing perfect.
The soul animates those earthly visions,
remembered in radiant dwelling by dream permission.
Composed by true inspiration,
from the richness of inebriation.
The sphere in sphere ripples from celestial conduct,
touches those fragile thought reception, by heart up-duct.
Symmetrical physics of harmonies,
when the sacred purpose recognizes itself with certainties.
The beautiful young woman’s accent was unusual.
Was she Romanian? Ukrainian?
Geoffrey could not place it, but he enjoyed hearing it.
Her soft voice sounded European.
Are you from the other side of the world? He asked her.
She smiled at him, giving nothing away.
Could you give me one more clue? Geoffrey asked.
Without hesitation, she threw back her head and howled.
Nothing faux about her howl, it was a bonafide wolf howl.
Long, furious, keening. Wolves in the forest answered.
Geoffrey was intrigued; this made her more genuine.
“You were raised by wolves,” he guessed.
“What kind of wolves?” the young beauty asked him.
His gaze melted into her ice blue eyes.
Arctic wolves?
She thought this was hilarious.
She was raised by amber-eyed wolves in Germany’s Black Forest.
They raced to Dick’s Bakery to buy his wares
He was hilarious, and sometimes full of swears
They bought his cakes, scones, muffins and pies.
Don’t know why, said Gram, rolling up her eyes.
He licks the spoon, he licks the bowl. Yes it is so.
Then he puts the spoon back in. Oh no! Oh no!
I went to see what the big deal was all about and saw Dick.
Came out holding frosted muffins with lemon frosting thick.
He licks the soon! He licks the bowl! Grandma said. It is so!
I did not care because these muffins had an amazing glow.
They tasted marvelous, as I am sure that you probably know.
Because I saw you in Dick’s Bakery too, Grandpa Joe.
A woman who did not want more schooling
She graduated high school at sixteen and did not look back
Taking a job, so she could be independent and move in to town
Why she would leave the country I will never know
One of seven children, she was surrounded by cousins.
And brothers and sisters, and farm animals.
Her childhood job was the chicken house
She collected eggs until it burned down
No one wanted chickens after that stench
She was a Godly woman, who married a spiritual man.
She knew the value of his soul, even if he was not a Bible believer
They raised us to do the right thing and be kind and compassionate
They both had a strong sense of ethics.
She was the best cook I have encountered in my sixty plus years.
She knitted, crocheted, made beautiful quilts and tatted.
Her beef and noodles over mashed potatoes were legendary.
She had a hilarious sense of humor, but she did not ridicule people.
She was beautiful inside and out, but did not flaunt either.
She was empathetic, loving and giving
But she did not say "I love you" for about fifty years
Because she had not been taught that.
She wanted her children to grow up strong and she got her wish.
She is my hero. She is my mother.
I thought she would live to be one hundred and twelve.
I was devastated when cancer killed her at eighty-eight.
Beware of the Impish Elf Brothers someone whispered to me.
I was spooked already, out here, at midnight by this hollow tree.
They are tricksters, they will fool you, warned my neighbor Fay.
I saw them peeking out of branches, but I quickly looked away.
They will steal your thoughts, and they will make you sing!
I thought this silly idea was the most hilarious of anything!
They will take your dreams and throw them underground.
impish Elf Brothers scare Christmas presents out of the ground.
That does not sound bad, I slowly said.
Yes it is! They replied, they bring out the dead.
I was horrified now, for this seemed a bit sick.
Sh! Those Impish Elf Brothers are incredibly slick!
What is this kidnapped nonsense when it comes to Maduro? The United States has never recognized Maduro as the rightfully elected President of Venezuela. Five years ago a judge in the Southern District of New York issued a warrant for his arrest, alleging Narco Drug Trafficking among other crimes. When the United States issues a warrant, for suspected crimes against its citizens, there are no borders -- no recognized safe havens in the world. If they can get to the suspect, they will. Maduro will be fairly tried in a court of law. 100,000 Americans died of drug overdoses last year. If anyone thinks that this is hilarious, which I have read in comments on Soup, they have a serious problem with right and wrong. If Democrats in the US Congress, do not like what Trump did, change the law. He is acting well within his rights as President of the United States. This type of Law Enforcement has been done by other US Presidents in the past. Nothing new here. What is new is, a Democrat Congress and Mainstream News Media, who seem to have lost their minds if not souls. If any opposition reading this, is into the bible, try reading the 9th commandment again. Let the legal system play out. As for the politics of oil, other natural resources, would you rather communist dictators remained in control, instead of transitioning all rights back to the citizens of a liberated Venezuela, restoring health and prosperity to a once very prosperous neighbor nation?
On January 10, 2025, the Biden administration bumped up the reward for information which would lead to Maduro’s arrest to $25 million. The reward was previously set at $15 million by the Trump administration. The Biden administration also announced at the time that it would be offering a $25 million reward for information which led to the capture of Dusisdadi Cabello, the country’s interior minister, a $15 million increase. In addition, a new $15 million reward was created for the detention of the country’s defense minister Vladimir Padrino Lopez. According to former Mayor of New York Eric Adams.
Most of my time is spent in a Piggly Wiggly line
So you know the Hollywood rags I have seen
Scouring them inside out, top to bottom, back to front
I know all the skinny on all the skinny stars in-between
This day Mona in a Moo Moo says from behind me
Something about this must be done
So with the east in our rear (That doesn't sound right does it!)
Look out Hollywood California here we come
Not long after landing in Los Angeles
Before we even barely had time
We set up what "THEY" think is an organic juice hand squeezed by Virgin's
and Himalayan soy Sushi bar
Out of our Hot Dog cart on the corner of Hollywood and Vine
And yes, we've added a little secret ingredient
Something to fatten those Hollywood types up
So they'll look like the rest of us in America
With the line around the block it looks like they can't get enough
With a little dab here and a little sprinkle there (wink,wink)
Our food has become the talk of the town
You'd think they would have figured it out by now
As each delicious bite adds a few extra pounds
And menu items with names like
-Add Another Roll Sushi-
Or the...
-Don't Look Behind You Sushi Surprise-
Then there's our most popular item
The -California Your Butt SuperSize-
Now that we've fattened up most of the Movie Stars and then some
California's so heavy it may soon slide into the sea
With a new concoction we've developed to stimulate brain juice's
We're now taking our Hot Dog Cart to Washington D.C.
Poetry generates magic
It's wizardry from a poet's pen
Turns a poem into a gem.
Whether rhymes be short or epic
As long as the message is clear
It matters not how they appear.
Some poems are classed as classic
Long after the poet has gone
Words survive to live on and on.
Sometimes happy, sometimes tragic
A poem is a work of art
Motivated straight from the heart.
Hilarious or dramatic
All kinds of wonderful it’s true
Is what poetic poets do.
Poetry generates magic
Whether they be short or epic
Some poems are classed as classic
Sometimes happy, sometimes tragic
Hilarious or dramatic.
~ * ~
Shetland Sheepdog Charlie jumped high in the air
Sheep he could handle, but this creature was unfair
As far as he knew it was an alien or a creature from far away
I was lucky to have my camera that day
I wish now I had put it on video, for it was a hilarious sight
Charlie ran off and hid, almost into the night
The mouse had been scared too, but he was braver now
He scuttled in the barn and hid under the cow
My children were going to call Charlie names like Scaredy Cat
I told them this would hurt him, so please don’t do that
One of them wanted to keep the mouse in his room.
I scooted the creature out of the barn with a broom.