Funny List Poems | Examples
These Funny List poems are examples of List poems about Funny. These are the best examples of List Funny poems written by international poets.
my feet smell
my nose runs
my heart breaks
my tongue is tied
my liver is chopped
my brain is cramped
my spare rib is missing
my throat harbors a frog
my sweet tooth is craving
my eye teeth need glasses
my funny bone isn’t laughing
my athlete’s foot lost the race
my sense of humor is twisted
my heel ran back to Achilles
my ear drum lost its rhythm
my pinky broke its promise
my mouth has a foot in it
my toes are hammered
my fingers are crossed
my lips are sealed
my fever broke
my breath is short
I’m long in the tooth
I can’t see eye to eye
the bridge of my nose is narrow
Call the Doctor!
Riding in an airplane
Skiing down snowy slopes
Racing across the ocean
Sliding away from loss
Painting a lovely canvas
Sculpting something nice
Singing to the top of my lungs
Playing guitar all night
Writing a literary novel
Smiling despite the sorrow
Listening to my instincts
Dancing through the rain
Laughing away a heartache
Breathing joy into another
Creating something beautiful
Planting seeds of goodness
Awaking to the starry skies
Drifting to sleep on a lullaby
Haunting the dreams of my true love
And, spreading Marmite on my toast
Marmite Poetry Contest
Sponsored by: Natasha L Scragg
August 1, 2021
Directions;
Read the following short passage. Then choose your answer from the
list below. Choose only one.
"She's an eyeful, a smiling mouthful and putty in my hands,
a) ___sorry, I used to have those glands"
b) ___she loves like a Heavy Metal band"
c) ___the fairest Maiden in all the land"
d) ___I drown in your timeless sensuous sands"
Ten Poems
1 Autumn Royal
Energy of life and brilliance of colors
2 Moon Harvest
Farmers’ song in splendor of moonlight cricket sounds
3 Monarch Butterfly
Elegant fragility and fearlessness of the monarch of the sky
4 Mismatch
Complexity of human psyche in smiling while crying
5 Midnight Sun
Journey of scorned heart to rebirth of love
6 You
A song of gratitude to love
7 Wake up and Sing
Sadness of fading youth with promise of rebirth
8 Change
The end is the beginning: Be surprised
9 Carnation and Roses
Maturity of love embracing thorn with rose of love
10 Garden hose
Funny poem for cats’ lovers
Third Place: Line Gauthier-10 Poems-5/24/20
The dog's at the door
Leash, collar, mask, rubber paw pads
The cat's doing three to five for
Shredding the toilet paper
The FBI fingerprint lab
Has ceased operation
Arrests are down
Everyone's wearing rubber gloves
And a mask
The Care Bears......DON'T
Virtual kisses smudge the screen
Virtual bar rooms
Together....but drinking alone
I caught the children watching
The Great Escape
My grandson now sleeps
With his baseball glove
My granddaughter stole
A spoon at supper
So how's your sanity holding up??
Mum has been in a care home since dad died . I try to see her every day except when I’m unwell or on holiday. My dad gave my sister cash for 'travel' but she's never visited and for the last 2 years not sent birthday or mother’s day cards or rings her, so my visits are very precious to my mum.
When I visit my mum I take:-
One loving heart
Two arms to embrace her
Three ideas for memory games
Four funny poems to read to her
Five pounds if her wallet is getting low
Open ears ready to listen ...
Self control for when she is incorrect!
Tissues for tears of laughter not sadness
Willing hands when she needs help toileting
Patience for when she repeats herself
Writing Challenge 3, July 2019 - List - Poetry Contest
Sponsored by Dear Hear
3/8/19
There are days I wonder how I could ever bear the loss of you. It scares me. Your absence. The silence. The emptiness. How I would long to nurture the void of you inside me. I can’t imagine life without :
• the twinkle in your eye
• your charm and laughter
• your generous affection
• the way you smile so freely
• your boyish sweetness and affection
• your gentle words and kindnesses
• even your silly comments and bad jokes
• your funny quirks and passions
• your unwavering support
• the safety of your arms
• and most of all those sweet nothings
AP: 2nd place 2021
Submitted on July 27, 2019 for contest WRITING CHALLENGE 3, JULY 2019 - LIST sponsored by DEAR HEART - RANKED 2ND
Stan even has his own coloring book on Amazon.com at https://www.amazon.com/Stan-Busy-Snail-Gail-DeBole/dp/B09MDVQLTR!
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Poem written by Gail DeBole on 10, 2015 and updated on 6/18/2018
Stan the Snail wished for a ride
On a turtle before Stan died
With his antenna intact
And the wind at his shell's back
He'd relax while enjoying the stride.
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Related Poems
Stan the Snail's Haiku
Stan the Snail's To Do List
Stan the Snail's Point of View
Woke at five and heard the rain sprinkle,
so I crawled back in for a good morning sleeper.
All that stIrred was the fan beside the bed as
I turned it off and curled to stir some heat.
My eyes went close and the world went black,
I went back sleep in hopes of St. Nick.
Not a dream lingers, not even a sound made.
That fat little" son of a monkey's az just
flew over my house again.
I flew from my bed with my shotgun in my hand,
I get you this time my friend and all your precious jewels.
Third round came and I let off a shot, Dang he's
quick as I hit Rudolph in the sack.
He rared and kicked as he shot straight to the sky.
As Santa cried, I get you next year as he
flew out of sight.
There's someones trash,
Others rare treasure,
A lost estate,
Someones eviction furniture,
Electronic doo-dads,
Scratched cd's
Colored glass,
X-box games,
Something for everyone
Sometimes a cafe next door
for those who spend the whole day!
The years are picking up speed
This last one just seemed to fly
To old age I soon must concede
But before life passes me by
Hang Gliding I really must try ..
Barbara Gorelick 1/8/12
Happy New Year contest
Well what do you know?
The list is still zero.
The Jockey tasted victory
In the last leg of the race
As the horse picked up her pace
And the favourite took first place
By the nose upon her face.
For Brian’s contest: “Rhyme Time”
humourous
My mother was the very best cook
In the beginning though she was not
And the very first pie she cooked got
In the house hidden out of sight in a pot
By the night thrown through floor pine knot
Inspired by Brian Strands but not an entry. I just wanted to see if I could write one.
(Mother said the first egg custard she made was all runny and she didn't want my father to
know that she messed up so she hid it for a while then poured it through the pine knot in the
floor. They were very poor living on a farm in a house without double flooring like today
and no rugs.)