Snow came down hard
Harassing the roadside bar
Taking one more shot
Reminding himself, 'he was hot'
John proceeded to the lavatory
Without any worry
Mirror, he did reflect
No fear of the word 'reject'
Ventured into the night
Seeking a romantic sight
Reality stated hurtful fight
"Goodbye, my dear knight
Our relationship is dead,"
Wearing the pearls he bought, she said
Returning to the watering hole
Shivering and cold
Shocking we were told
Seductress commanded the stage
Half anyone's age
Protected inside a cage
Belting out a tune
Loving warmth came back soon
After being swooned
Patrons did say
Heating bill, owner electronically paid
When the tempting tease was done
She approached the admirer, looking for fun
As for the haunting past outside
Confirming someone had lied
And died
"Those pearls fit you right"
Stranger mentioned, eyes bright
"They are a little tight,"
Informed the songbird, preparing for a deathly fight
Confirming fan, a nut
She kicked them in the butt
Finding a cell
Lonely, I must tell
Remember me as deep Insight
a naked Presence raw and authentic
as my grey ashes float blue waves
like when the tiny slave boat
reached Cape’s shores in
a country of Rainbow colours
remember my humour which you
could not get and only laughed long after
Remember my willingness to stand before
the cruellest of interrogators for
the freedom of my country
drinking water from a prison cell’s
lavatory pot as pointed rifles were held
in mock shoot and I said “Shoot
but freedom will still come”
Remember my crimson wisdom dancing with
Excalibur in the dead of black nights
my jigsaw quilts made from scraps
and the way I wheelchaired to a
washing line that did not exist
baked bread without yeast
how I could tell a cockroach to leave
and she scattered
Mostly remember that I came and left fulfilled
knowing that Divinity is well pleased with me !
Have you heard the story,
in all of it's fun and glory.
It is about a young girl named Lori,
she went with a boy named John Dory.
She went running to the lavatory,
was this going to become inflammatory?
Eating blue cheese and old pickles each day,
sitting by the bay.
Her boyfriend John Dory just wanted to play,
she kept saying no way.
Now on her birthday,
she is getting a baby not a blue jay.
My lady wife does strange things with the lavatory brush
She stands it in the loo and then she activates the flush
But she’s my girl and not someone that I would want to chasten
Except she leaves the brush there like it’s Guardian of the Basin
I know she pours in loads of bleach in which the brush can soak
I don’t know why she does this for alas I'm just a bloke
So when I walk into the loo that brush is standing proud
Protruding from the lavvy pan as I proclaim out loud…
My darling, I’m so happy that you keep our home hygienic
But that there plastic poker in our loo is hardly scenic
So I don’t have a Labrador but what if I were blind…
You’d find me running out of here while clutching my behind
Foolish folly in the house of putrid politics
Dirty deeds up their sleeves double-dealing tricks
Forgetting the homeless, ignoring the poor
Though staying between the lines of the law
Oh ! And the law, well that’s another story
One suggesting a lavish lavatory!
For the criminal not for the upstanding
Not for the meek though only demanding
Yes the pecking order is quite transparent
With suited criminals all apparent
Trickling down such bad behaviour
Praying to my only saviour-
Please help them to sow seeds of decency
Awaken the blind to the difference of recency
For this society unravels the very pits
When ruled by a bunch of moronic dimwits
With crime through the roof that hinders well-being
Many are silent with sickness from seeing
The defeated and shattered upon a tightrope
Without any justice-there is no hope!
There is pain in the eyes, if time was taken, it would be seen.
Busy are they, no time but to be blind, no visual hygiene.
Dirty, is the way of the worldly, covered in the devils boweled releasing.
Enthralled, as they flow down lavatory piping.
Developing gills for the sewered waters of living.
The pungent odors of its stench begins normalizing.
As the vague scent of yesterday rides the breeze, fading into the winds
of passing.
Pursuing and ridiculing the remaining few into hiding.
The old giving way to the new world orders enslaving.
War, famine, and disease, released to finalize controlling.
While the strangle hold around hopes neck is firmly choking.
dimming the light of life, for the curtains closing.
As the final stage is set, for God's ending.
Always the last to release his spoon,
Still thinking it rather soon
Or hand in the kitchen’s key,
Now letting the poor thing feel free!
The Unlikeliest to pity his jaw muscles,
In all restaurants, a piece of eternal puzzle;
Clearly prematurely visiting the pot
To pointedly pounce on it on the spot.
Often times, after a full tank
Euphoric about a freshly served meal,
For which his congested bowel doesn’t him thank;
Rather ashamed of his food-seizing zeal…
The mouthfuls mirroring a python’s swallows
And straight gulps for which in penury he wallows.
Fast becoming undersized are his shorts
Spotting tens of tears in their flaps;
To be soon discarded the recently bought
By no means obliging him the gaps.
While for him labour waits in a repository,
Now and then charging into a lavatory
To later surface at the sewage department
All in a fleeting moment
For the predictable muffled discussion
Minus future precaution.
An answer to a question I really need to know
If you need to spend a penny where do you go
Everyone would say toilet that's certainly true
However some people like to call it the loo
Some of us are lazy when going for a pee
They would mention going to the W.C
The Americans call it John I do believe
Comes in handy when you need to relieve
The expression I find most amusing and funny
Is that the Aussies call the lavatory a dunny
Unfortunately the word khazi isn't used anymore
So many words for toilet that's for sure
THE KNIGHTS NIGHT OUT
The kings knights went out for some drinking
Mead flowed all got drunk armour clinking
A short cut home through the mire
Wearing their heavy attire
One by one they all started sinking...
A STINGING REVENGE
A husband was found out playing away
His wife not happy vowed to make him pay
Caught them in their bed
Both were butt naked
She threw fire ants over them as they lay...
ALWAYS GOOGLE
Old manJohnny found a bomb in his shed
There were two wires a blue and a red
He pulled out the wrong wire
It blew up caused a fire
The next time ill ask Google he said...
LAVATORY BLUES
Fred just made it to the lavatory
Night before he'd ate a dodgy curry
When business was completed
Poor old Fred remained seated
When he saw the dispenser was empty...
In a pickle he thought what can I do
Im stuck in this little room in the loo
He thought this isn't funny
And used his paper money
So let this lim be a warning to you...
Written on 30th August 2020.
Some guys sprinkle when they have a tinkle
and spurt wee wee all over the floor
Then they leave the lavatory seat up
these two actions I simply abhor!
The ladies sit down on the toilet
when they are in need of the loo
But they always take ages to finish
it’s no wonder there's often a queue!
But my biggest bug bear when I'm sitting
is that there is no darn toilet roll
I have to fumble about for a tissue
so I can wipe my dirty butt hole!
LAST VERSE INSPIRED BY GOING TO A VENUE WHICH HAD WALL MOUNTED DISPENSERS ... FOUR OF THEM IT WAS IMPOSSIBLE TO GET THE PAPER OUT OF .... ARGH, THANKFULLY I ALWAYS CARRY TISSUE IN MY BAG
08/14/20
Piss
I tell missy for class say;
Aunty, i want to go and piss
Naim everybody con begin to de laugh,
Auty coman get angry and get up and shout
'Class if i hear pim again'
Anty na look at my side and talk say,
You this child;
You can not come and kill me in this school,
Now correct yourself in good English
Before i flog your bum bum,
'I wan to go outside and wee wee anty' please
As the piss don catch me well well
I now run straight from inside class to lavatory.
In the lavatory, i see many many big big ;
Some black, brown, water - water and
small small worm everywhere,
It is not working again
So it is smelling bad bad
And teacher say dirty environment
Is germs and disease place
I now coman run to the bush
In the back of lavatory to piss
Kr kr kr kr
The zipper didn't want to open
So i now draw my school knicker down
And lowered my pant,
'Pss psssssssssss pss pss.
Pr pr pr pr prrrrrrrrrrrrr
Leki kettle way de blow whistle.
After i now finish pissing,
I shake my thing very well so the last drop
do not stain my cloth
So my Classmate will not say
I piss on my body and start calling me
"Pissi pissi for body".
Ghops
Hollow as a crooked pipe conducting waste to the corroded sewer
Vacant and obscure like a Freudian void on a cold lavatory seat
Hollow as a piper’s flute waiting for nimble charming fingers
Vacant like a comatose stare reflecting mindless nothingness
Shallow as a muddy puddle pummelled by boots from wet feet
Superficial like a scratch on a bubble conceding trivial defeat
Shallow as a trickling tributary succumbed to inarticulate drought
Superficial like a crowded scream never leaving mute fears
Fallow as unwanted seeds swirling around into darkness
Dormant like a sleepy reminder of night mares fighting for victory
Fallow as untilled soil longing for cultivated surrender
Dormant like a tired tramp homeless and halting suspense
Mellow as marsh mallows molten on deep cutting sticks
Bitter sweet like a camp fire sending smoke into nowhere
Mellow only in that as it rhymes with bellow and gallows
Sweet bitter and numb like waste in a lone piper’s dream
The ladies stood in a long queue
The mayor thought they might sue
With their knees together
In all kinds of weather
They await their turn in the loo
College
Study in your little garret.
Try, in your earnest youth,
To learn the ins/outs
Of mice and men, stars and storms,
The ways of your own future heart.
Fear and Motivation
Await just beyond the ivy covered walls;
So take this time,
Go to underground movies,
Heckle the Bible Thumpers come to save you from your mind.
A little learning can be dangerous, yes
But never so bad as none.
So you play Devil's Advocate over bad coffee,
Worse food
In featureless halls
While you bankrupt yourself and your parents.
This is the time of sex experiments upon yourself,
Neurons firing wildly under the influence of chemicals and sleeplessness,
Until one day you wake up,
Pad into some bland communal lavatory,
Splash water on your face to clear the clouds,
Look up into your young impassive face
And at last begin to study,
REALLY study.
Then somewhere a gate swings softly open,
And a true thinker stumbles forth
Into the growing light
Of the rest of their life.
That's how I perceived it to be,
Sitting in my lavatory;
After stress and strain
I could not abstain
From writing a real sob story.
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