We were on a side quest. I wanted some cool, fresh
cherries to savor as we strolled hot Saint Tropez.
So we were in a grocery store, in the township,
I was pushing a shopping cart along the frozen food aisle
when suddenly my feet flew out from under me and I
took a hard, embarrassing, backward spill.
Peter was shocked - “What?!” He exclaimed.
One second I was up and the next I was on my back.
It was like a lightning strike or a film edit, I was like WTF?
I was in flip-flops and there was a puddle of water.
I was fine, if scuffed up - thank god I wasn’t in a dress.
I got right up, I mean I’m not a 90-year-old lady.
And after a second we walked on, only to be swarmed,
a moment later, by the store manager and his minions
- “Are you ok?” He asked, scrubbing his hands.
“Yes, I’m fine - no, I don’t want to fill out a report”
My left big-toe was swollen and bleeding - so no running
along the beach this morning - now THAT seemed weird.
I guess it was more of a back-side quest.
.
.
A song for this:
Helter Skelter by the Beatles
Trouble Me by 10,000 Maniacs
Sid now realized her suit was all wrong
but she'd hid in this stall for too long
So, she stuck out her gut
to distract from her butt
and snuck back to the pool in her thong
I've been a vegetarian since 1999 (but not a vegan). Anyway, I'm just having a little fun here.
A lion took the very front seat,
hankering for something to eat
in a vegan's convention,
causing a little tension.
The forest king, self-conscious, grew,
not knowing exactly, what to do.
He bowed his head and confessed,
then ate every guest.
"Somewhere in time,"
(not the movie)
poetry
became a narrative
for recording
memories.
It must have been this evening
at my son’s first band concert,
the winter one.
(It was full of songs:
the ones I don't remember,
except for
'Spicy, Chicken Sandwich.'
It was the one
with lots of drums,
and his trumpet).
I told him so,
afterwards.
He was
somewhat less
than interested.
On our way home,
he made me laugh.
My line was:
“I filmed every song, honey.”
His line was:
“Yeah, well
I played every song,
so…”
The “lost in translation”
translation:
"I am a sixth grader.
Everything
you say and do,
mom,
is embarrassing,"
I am the proud:
“Village Idiot."
My mom used to say that
about herself,
when I was his age.
I can feel my pulse in my fingertips,
like my hands are trying to escape.
Do I lean in? Do I lean back?
Please don’t let me stumble over my own feet.
My heart is doing that ridiculous thumping thing.
Why does it feel like the world is waiting?
Should I say something? Something clever?
No, just stay quiet, it’s fine.
Just breathe…oops, too noticeable.
Why is everything suddenly so tricky?
Your eyes are so close, almost too near.
Okay, maybe not, maybe it’s the perfect distance.
What if my lips are awkward? What if I taste strange?
I’m panicking, yes, in every corner of me.
I tell myself stop, act normal… but my pulse gives me away.
“Hey… is everything okay? You seem nervous.”
I nod too fast, my thoughts scattering everywhere.
I want to laugh, I want to crawl under a rock.
I feel like I might float or fall all at once.
My eyes dart everywhere, but you’re right here, holding my hand.
And then it happens, gentle, hesitant, soft.
Our lips meet, and my stomach flutters.
It’s awkward, it’s funny, it’s perfect in its messiness.
I think, maybe this is how first kisses are meant to feel.
And I secretly hope it never ends.
a neighbour takes umbrage
at his own narrowness
then vents rage
on us who so witnessed
momentary flicker of flame
there is no judgment and yet
the aspect that so clings
assumes ownership
quite delusional of course
and therein lies the dilemma
we opt to be still
fanning not the fire
There are riders, jockeys, grooms, and handlers too,
that don’t think twice about the work they do.
Their love for horses is a commitment they share
But their safety is a concern for them all to be aware.
To fall from your horse is an embarrassing event
when only your backside is the one to repent.
The risks are many and always there,
when being with horses you must always take care.
Times are hard if injury strikes,
for healing may be slow that nobody likes.
With thoughts and wishes I convey, that you all ride and work safely to enjoy the next day.
Take care when confidence thrives, it opens the gate, to a moment you may not anticipate.
Never underestimate the power of a three-year-old to embarrass a roomful of adults!
She had a big issue with public toilets
All those dirty horrible germs
She would do her best to try and hold on
Until her home….she did return!
Her sister came to visit her
When she resided in Singapore
To enjoy a fun filled sister time
Exploring, shopping and more
This particular day they were shopping
In a big department store
When a sudden call of nature
Came a knocking at her door!
She scurried away to find a toilet
Her sister stayed to look at shoes
It was quite a distance and busy walk
Before she discovered the loos
Disliking public toilets so
Toilet paper was piled to cover the seat
In and out and hands washed
Business over and done…..complete!
Long , crowded walk back to her sister
Who soon said “Hang on whats that?…..turn around”
There hanging out of her black trousers
Was a long tail of white toilet paper…. nearly touching the ground!!
Santa Claus climbed a chimney
Suddenly he fell off a high wall,
His big bum was embarrassingly sore
because he had a horrendous fall.
03/01/22
'A Funny Christmas Themed 4 liner' Contest
Sponsor Tania Kitchin
It was a Sunday morning in June, how well I recall
I stood in the pulpit with my morning sermon in print
When all of a sudden I began to extemporize
A moment never to be forgotten--never at all!
I was telling about an event that had angered me
When I accidentally let a shameful curse word slip
The congregation of worshippers fell deathly silent
I wanted to grab my sermon notes and hurriedly flee.
The silence continued for several minutes, I thought,
While I stammered and stuttered and tried to apologize
But it was too late, whatever the damage, it was done
While some composure, a recovery I quickly sought.
Then, suddenly the quick-witted organist played a riff
And I heard a raucous laughter rising up from the pews
I realized the silence had been broken just in time
For my people to know that their young pastor was no stiff!
written May 10, 2021
for "The Audience Falls Silent" Poetry Contest
sponsored by Kai Michael Neumann
Have any of these things ever happened to you guys
On the main floor elevator in Cape Cod, Cathie wanted to cry
Two large ladies got on and pushed TWO
I said, “TWO? Could've walked WOO WOO'?
“What! And lose a pound” one answered, “Why!”
He'd always chased the girls, back in the day
An embarrassing habit on display
Like his old pop
He couldn't stop
Because of what's in his genes, they would say!
broad innocent smile ~
hospital gown barely
covering his pride
Published in The Trillium Haiku Group Anthology's MOVING FORWARD, 2020
AP: Honorable Mention 2020
Nothing was more embarrassing,
than when I got caught jamming my air guitar maniacally dancing,
to the melodic orchestrations of ABBA singing.
Yeah, I like ABBA, no doubt about it.
You got a problem with that? Wanna step outside and do something about it?
Sub Categories
Looking for the formal definition, structure, and history of this poetry form? Visit the Poetry Dictionary entry below. Then return to explore how PoetrySoup members bring the form to life through their own poems.