Best Weirder Poems

I had a cat name snowball
she died!
she died!

my mom said she was at the vet
she lied!
she lied!

....

Just Kidding!


Oh no!
Look at this joe
Face on the desk cause he's writing so low
Lifted his head and what did I see:

Oh wah! wah! wah!
Mommy didn't love me!

Saw another girl...

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Hello, I am a praying mantis from the tropics,
a killer really, once I bit off the head of my lover;
and then I ate him, yummy and then I was caught,
I ended up in a pet store until one day she bought me.
I am a strange...

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“The Scorpion’s Touch”

Under glass
the sound cuts out sharp
just like under water
and we run out of breath 
like insects running around 
frantically out of time
we are magnified 
in our tight enclosures

internally observed
the external turns away
two heart beats in the one
a new view of an old star

as...

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WHAT IF?

Alone with my thoughts on a thoughtful day; just thinking
I thought of many things but one thing keeps replaying; what if?
What if there is more to life than just being meaning and meaningless to people?
I attend church to be saved; what if church can’t...

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Each English-speaker knows that funner means more fun than fun,
   and weirder means more weird than weird. And yet nary a one
of "proper" dictionaries has neologism words -
   the editors must think 'nonce words' are all words for the birds!
There's googobs...

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Written by Gail DeBole
on April 23, 2016

Medicine prescribed for somebody's woe.
Could be for sickness, a worry or intense pain from a foe. 

You say to beware of the medicine
That brings on the dreams
That are weirder or bizzare-r than they’ve ever been.

It’s an awareness I lack...

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> My parents gave me advice. Of the dead only speak nice. Now if I heard right someone is being critical of Sir Terry Wogan, and that is not right. So as The Mad Author I have been called to write in his defence, and...

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Written by Gail DeBole on May 29, 2017

Lacy Limerick lived on a lane
Named Limerick off a street named Main
As if that wasn't enough
Here's even more weirder stuff
Limerick was also the town's name.

There is more about Lacy to know
A poet who wrote humor that flowed
Can you...

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All of a sudden I miss a step
And then you excuse me the lack of continuity 
He dragged me here, taking me by my hair and then asked me to leave some space in me to handle all of his dirt.
To exchange.

I could be stronger...

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This is too bizarre to make up, and can only be in the USA;

Social Services sent me a letter
They would stop my services unless
I sent them a copy of
the letter they sent me

Bizarre?  It gets weirder.
Henceforth, my case manager
requested from them,
A copy of said...

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I was running so hard my feet were nearly raw!
This was worse than the time I ate a rusty thing of coleslaw
I started to stumble back
Man I really need a big mac
I tumbled over right on a bee
Out of everyone that could get stung it...

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A full moon is known for making people do things that are weirder and weirder. It only appears at night, even when the Earth rotates and stuff. It happens on every 14th of 15th of the lunar month. The full moon is so whole, but...

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I live in a trailer park in upstate N.Y.
proud, dumb white trailer trash I is
don't really know well my neighbors
to me that is just as well
you'll understand far better when
you hear the tale I'll tell

across from my small single trailer
looms a large expensive double
but the...

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OF ROY AND PINCH BANDITS

Claims Roy one day
to have been approached
by an angel of GOD
alleges the said angel
brought him news
news that he would pass to glory
complete with day and time...

Come the day... Roy
arranges meeting with cece..
.. his beloved siz..
Roy unable to confess..to cece..
the truth.. bout...

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His real name was Cliff...
But we called him
Cleo Van Hoppenburg,
Better known as "Uncle Cleo",
To all who did love him...
Though not quite normal of mind,
He was the center of attention,
You probably know the kind...

Favorite phrases...
"Ho, ho, ho!!!"
"Dommy (me..his nearest version to Tommy)....
Doozie Botts!!!.....
Oh, he put on...

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