Best Weenie Poems

To the tune of "Itsy Bitsy, Teenie Weenie, Yellow, Polka-Dot Bikini"
Dedicated to Nancy Pelosi

Chorus:
She has an itsy bitsy
Teenie weenie
Brain inside her little beanie
And she uses...

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A dachshund named Oscar was he,
which adored trick or treating with me,
so I had me some fun
when I sewed a cloth bun,
for a Halloween weenie...

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Overweight Terrier:
   Porky
   Yorkie
Un-cool Terrier:
   Dorky
   Yorkie

Spaniel dog breeder:
   Cocker
   Stocker
Parrot who mimics...

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She is a lifeline in the blue-black of days
Curled on my lap, her sausage form rolls
All over the bed ... without guilt, without care;

Weenie girl...

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FOOTLES FOR THE BIRDS AND THE BEASTS - 

Bad-ass old bear:
    Grizzly
    Grizzly

Dachshund making critical life choices:
  ...

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Under his nose hung a big greenie.
The kids all thought he was a meanie.
He didn't have a hankie.
That's why he was so cranky.
Also, he had...

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I espied a large woman called Evie
(She was wearing her  husband’s mankini)
Though her skin was quite pale
She looked like a beached whale
It’s a pity...

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There was once an old woman,
Who lived in a small village,
Her name was Matilda Schoeman
Like Popeye, she only ate spinach!
One day she went to her...

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It was my first summer job
I didn’t feel quite ready 
but I tossed all hesitation aside
it was time to stretch my wings

I felt lucky and...

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"Make it quick" they barked. "We all have to pee."
The cock legged one woofed right back, "Don't rush me!"
Female dogs may have fleas
But they don't...

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RED ON THE HEAD,
LIKE A WEENIE ON A DOG,
LIKE A NOODLE ON A POODLE,
LIKE KETCHUP ON A LOG,...

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Dachshund headgear:
Weenie
Beenie

Frankfurter for a Dachshund:
Weenie
Weenie

Grouchy Dachshund:
Meany
Weenie

Proportionally, a male Dachshund has a:
Teenie
Weenie
(But size isn't everything)

Dachshund making critical life choices:
Eeenie
Weenie......

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Having trouble writing? Just do as I have very recently done.

I decided to go on a vision quest, to find my special spirit guide.
But no...

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I doff my fedora to the feller who invented pertater chips!
That genius developed the ideal thingy in which to immerse our dips!
How could we survive...

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Dachshund headgear:
    Weenie
    Beenie

Frankfurter for a Dachshund:
    Weenie
    Weenie

Grouchy Dachshund:
   ...

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