Tim Ryerson Poet Footle

A Compilation of Fickle Foolish Footles

FOOTLES FOR THE BIRDS AND THE BEASTS - 

Bad-ass old bear:
    Grizzly
    Grizzly

Dachshund making critical life choices:
     Eenie
     Weenie...

Cougar from Arizona:
    Yuma
    Puma

Cowardly Cock-a-Doodle-Doer:
    Chicken
    Chicken

Slave Driving Beaver:
    Dam it
    Damn it!

Aptly named female feathered friend:
    Robin
    Robin
 
Alaska poacher gets mauled by a:
    Polar's
    Molars

Overweight Terrier:
    Porky
    Yorkie

Scavenger Mores:
    Vulture
    Culture

After sex, bears often share a:
    Yogi
    Stogie

Neutered Tomcat:
    Benign
    Feline

Wolf in Sheep’s clothing:
     Mutton
     Glutton

Proportionally, male Dachshunds have:
     Teenie
     Weenies
(But size isn't everything)
.........................................

RANDOM AND RATHER REDICULOUS FOOTLES -  

Overweight law enforcement official:
    Whopper
    Copper

Overweight Janitor:
    Whopper 
    Mopper

Spaced-out church officer:
   Freekin’ 
   Deacon

Church officer forced to depend on Depends:
   Leakin'
   Deacon

Unhappy restaurant client:
    Diner
    Whiner

Cosa Nostra restaurant special:
    Mobster
    Lobster

Yep, you guessed it. A criminal Crustacean:
    Lobster
    Mobster 

Why did she slap me? All I did was:
    Toot her
    Hooter

Careless Urologist:
    Pecker
    Wrecker

♡Like0

Share Poem

---

Post Comments

Poetrysoup is an environment of encouragement and growth so only provide specific positive comments that indicate what you appreciate about the poem. Negative comments will result your account being banned.

Please Login to post a comment

Poet Destroyer A August 8, 2016 at 10:45 PM TIM, Congratulations on your awesome win. Stop by and enjoy my latest blog "It's Over." always & forever ~LINDA~

Laura Breidenthal October 25, 2015 at 3:08 PM Hilarious, Tim! Really enjoyed reading these! ^__^ Always, Laura

Connie Marcum Wong October 19, 2015 at 2:07 PM Congratulations on your win with these creative footles Tim. As you know, I loved them!

Dr. Upma A. Sharma October 19, 2015 at 5:14 AM Congrats on ur sweet win Tim!

Poet Destroyer A October 18, 2015 at 3:53 PM Tim, Congratulations on your wonderful win. Stop by my latest blog "Peace Now" if you'd like or have time. WUV ~LINDA~

Monterey Sirak October 11, 2015 at 6:51 AM These gave me a great laugh this morning!

Connie Marcum Wong October 11, 2015 at 6:43 AM Cougar from Arizona: Yuma Puma Church officer forced to depend on Depends: Leakin' Deacon You are the best at creating these Tim... I am coming back again when I need a laugh. I am fav'ing these. Excellent! I can't even write ONE! #7

Richard Lamoureux October 8, 2015 at 8:00 AM Now this was fun!

Kp Nunez October 8, 2015 at 12:21 AM hahaha...Footle extravaganza! Love your humor, Tim! I especially liked the Mobster Lobster and vice versa. What makes your footles exceptional is that even the 1st syllybulls rhyme! You even played with Charlotte's name...Cheeky Timmy!

Poet Destroyer A October 6, 2015 at 9:38 AM LOL, Tim, you are so good at these footles. I think the pecker-wrecker was too funny. LOL to the urologist. Toot her - hooter... naughty.. Enjoyed. LINDA

Charlotte Puddifoot October 5, 2015 at 5:25 PM these are so witty and clever, dear man, you have a real aptitude for these quirky footles - i can't write them to save my life! :) Tim Ryerson October 5, 2015 at 5:55 PM Add an 'le' to your last name and you will become a master of this form...Since you are a red-head, I do now dub thee: 'Scarlet Charlotte' (Pudifootle)

Andrea Dietrich October 5, 2015 at 4:04 PM hahha. Great minds think alike. I have even a few of these in my own compilations already. Who gets ownership?heehee. You really do think like I do in this form, Tim. That is what I like about your humorous writes. I really get them. GREAT footles. Tim Ryerson October 7, 2015 at 3:50 PM Yes we do think alike don't we? Might I suggest co-ownership? Thanks for the comment my friend!

Duke Beaufort October 5, 2015 at 3:07 PM Nothing like a good laugh, Tim. You have a gift.

Constance La France October 5, 2015 at 12:52 PM Tim , your footles are delightful and fun, a smiling 7 and thanks for visiting my poem, in response. .. very meaningful writes for me and thanks for the nice comment. .

Jan Allison October 5, 2015 at 5:48 AM Sure made me smile Tim:-) hugs Jan xx 7

Mark Woods October 5, 2015 at 4:49 AM Loved this, nothing like a good chuckle.