Best Short Pants Poems


Nudge Nudge Wink Wink

They sit in the long grass
Cuddled up to smooch
She smiles at him sweetly’ saying
You can look but not touch

He looks so dejected 
That’s not what he wants
He is hungry inside
His breath comes in short pants

He tries to coax her
With a nibble on her ear
But she’s having none of it
He’s going without, I fear.

Bet your minds are a quiver
Nudge  nudge  wink  wink
But it’s only the sandwiches
He’s after 
                I Think???

Out of the Grey

I have a grey shirt, grey short pants and grey socks.
The grey school with its grey toilet blocks and grey nuns
made my mother buy them,
which was understandable, because folks like us
were supposed to only buy grey clothes, and live in grey towns
for fear of going color-blind. 

If ever we had understood
that the grey faces that ruled us
were all working for the Ministry of Greyness,
we would have run.

The Queen, the B.B.C. and all our betters 
felt that too much color in our lives 
might lead us to seek impossible rainbows,
and so, we were taught to know our place
on the color chart of life.

At ten, mum bought me a pair of long blue jeans.
I felt like I could ride a horse, or rock and roll
as good as Elvis (he was an American who lived far away
in a world of razzle-dazzle grace).

The girl next door, without prior warning,
took off her long grey dress and put on 
a red short skirt dotted with colorful butterflies.

Neither of us being grey that day,
we gravitated together dangerously.
Dad warned us not to be too flashy,
but we went to the park anyway.

As we walked in a hand-held gentleness.
We saw the flowers turn their blooms to us.
We knew then that we were in an English poem
a poem that had never been grey, 
but was forced into shapeless muted tones
by those who kept all the words to that English poem
for themselves.

Premium Member Two Limericks For Tuesday

~ GREEN JELLO ~ 

A fellow from an archipelago
Puts on caps and hats made of green jello
   Doesn't care what you think
   His short pants shocking pink
Wears lipstick and rouge too ~ bright hot yellow



     ~ THE TOOTH FAIRY ~

The cutest girl in the monastery
Is planning to become a Tooth Fairy
   She hides teeth in her bra
   Young boys cry "Ooh-la-la"
Saying their prayers eagerly, quite merry


Premium Member Funny Kid's Tinkle Dance

I wanted to wear my best outfit to school
So I went in my closet and stood on a stool
Looking for my socks, I had a special pair
I kept looking, but couldn't find them anywhere
Bright ones and dark ones, three in a pack
But the ones I wanted , were purple and black 
I found them, so I didn't wear polkadot or green
Wore them with short pants, so that they would be seen

Finally when ready I headed for the bus
Mom made me late with all of her fuss
I ran really fast in hopes I'd catch up
Unfortunately tripping, on my little brown pup
Down I went with force on both knees
It seems I have a kinda clumsy disease
I got up and wiped, the dust off my pants
and suddenly was doing my gotta tinkle dance

So I ran to my neighbor "Please, I gotta go pee!"
Mrs. Smith said "sure, down the hall at door three."
Past her I ran, by her picture of Flipper
Into the bathroom but couldn't open my zipper
The rest was embarrassing I hung my head low
As the wetness on my pants, started to grow
Around me I wrapped, a towel of great size
Leaving the bathroom, I couldn't look in her eyes

She hugged me and said, "it's an okay thing."
"I have the perfect pair, of cool pants to bring."
She said they were magic, with a button fly
And could only fit a fun little guy!
After she let me wash up, I put on the pants
She said with them, I wouldn't do the tinkle dance
Purple and black with perfect matching socks
Boy Mrs. Smith that woman really rocks

With my new pants, I made it to the school
But before I went, I thanked her for being cool
Kindness is special it made things A okay
I thought of her, when I went to play
A bit of kindness turned my day bright
A friend is an angel who makes things allright
So in art class I made her a special card
Me in my special pants and us both laughing hard!

The First Game of Spring

The first game of spring
It was the first game of the year.
The go lumpducks vs the hot rugcats.
On 1st base for the hot rugcats is: Tiny judy mad cat
On 2nd is Flash betty furball 
At short stop is licky slip maybell 
On 3rd three leg piggy polecat
Rt field Cassy cool cat
Cfield Tiffy Mudcat
 Lt field Vicky short pants Field cat.
Pitching Wild arm Jayne legcat
Catching Junkcat Kitty
The game is cancel due to Rats on the field  the team is hard to control
A real mess the lumpducks left after the first rat was tore apart.
But that's your line up for tomorrows game.

Oldd the Days

Old are they; those fables
Green they seemed so idle,
murrain of theirs still but
stand.

Odd how all of us prattle
Lads indeed we still are
longing hearty; throstles  
songs sang_we all are.

Old; we wot these birds
their silent screams,
their feathers whim;
Nwunwani ya malena
oh swain to boyish manner.

Odd these tricks;futile
that laugh; humor felt
fainly graft; lusty marks
brat indistinct;two of these.

Old indeed friends many, 
lunatics, lovers, poets;
to me:days where fine
the faces, the smiles;
the best_my closest: my mother.

Odd_history of man's fall
from glory; temporal but
lowly, to the swam of folks 
indulged in folksy fables
and wind drought eagles.

Old the age of time,
if he were to count her down
feast_lamps shone_indwelling clans;
of rocks as bread and
lands as fields of gold.

Odd these slippers_my
lullaby, the gentle embrace
of firm support and fashionable
hey, hello; nice shoes,
intrigue in loops.

Old my looney_little mate
from lands only of  myth,
imagined places: those
created films_my pixel pinky.

Odd my interest in single
females,of simple yarn and
lowly glory that's too fragile for;
lollipops_kisses and pecks like
v award winds.

Old these melodies of Bome_yes
bome; these loving tides of
beautiful countenance rose
as roses at noonday;as
waves at water pools.

Odd these Irish boys of Ireland_
Scottish accents in American films
faked acts of Hitler in short pants,
Black dark doves; the purity of beauty
Africa.

Old yes odd these remarkable words:
these watery lines_the days.


Premium Member Who's Running This Show

So early on a Sunday morn
Our little Boy Blue was born.
Dad nearly blew his hat.

When Blue was born, Dad said with scorn
“On my son, no short pants are worn.”
Mom said, “We’ll see ‘bout that.”


April 18 2012

The World of Illusion

The World Of Illusion 
 
Just Like a bird in a guilded cage we are all
supposed to be free ?  But  are we really 
free ? The answer is No !, in Australia we 
are compelled to vote, we are fined if 
we don't vote, as our governments make
laws that control our lifestyle, when life 
was created by God he deemed all of us 
were born equal, that being the case why 
do we need a leader to govern as we are 
all as good as each other, laws create 
problems in society, and corrupts our 
lifestyles. When society, tells us what we are 
permitted to do and even what we say and 
wear, is that freedom ?, the answer is No, 
we live in a society were we are forced to 
accept rules on our personal appearance, 
it was alright for women to wear skirts and 
men to wear long pants, and boys to wear 
short pants all in the name of tradition 
and this is dictating our lives, if we fail to 
comply we are discriminated by society and 
looked upon as anti socialists which in some 
extremes can lead to civil unrest and world wars, 
we are all prisoners of tradition and government 
laws, we do things to please everyone except 
ourselves and that is selfishness that needs to 
change as people need to wear and look as they 
wish. here are some examples these days women 
can wear pants and men even wear skirts, they 
are called kilts that Irish and Scottish soldiers 
would wear into battles. Makeup only woman 
wear allowed to wear, yet in very early times 
men would wear make up, back in the Egyptian 
dynasties. It was also the same in indian tribal 
customs only men wore war paint, but it has 
all changed. If a man wore lipstick in the street 
today he would be laughed at as being gay or 
a drag queen, yet circus clowns have done this 
in there work amusing children, even actors 
use it with no incriminations, so why can't 
men and women have a say in what they 
wear and how they dress and have nothing 
said about it, if we were truly free we could 
do all of this, but as long as discrimination 
rules society we will always be forced to obey 
tradition and follow the rules that suits a select 
few and not the majority of the world we live in. 
This explains my thesus that we are just like 
that bird in a guilded cage, we seek freedom 
but can never really be free. This is the order 
of our society today.

Turn Hand Make Fashion

The cooking oil ran out
Before the dough began to fry
She took the fishgut out
And broast it empty till it dry
Then making smaller cakes
She potted them crispy again
On medium flame, flakes
Of brown, the royal taste remain.

When the pants were shabby
This grown boy saw her cut the leg
And with competency
Placed a seamless patch, I couldn't beg
Nothing newer for pride.
I wore my short pants  out of tall
With a warm smile inside
For the most industrious of all

She cured wounds with the sod
Mixed in with a little spittle,
Made soap from ackee pod,
And her meat with spanish needle.
She shined the floor with fat
From melted candle, boiled water
With glass and sun; her chat
Was in prayer, her drink laughter.

Nothing was wasted there
Were mother kept us in her flock
Her folks ways did she share
Through proverbs; her faith tough as rock.
They say turn hand, make it
Turn hand and make fashion, my dear
The unconquered spirit
Of my mother, forbids the world a tear.

-reflections: Those Pompous Pommey Days-

THE POMPOUS POMMEY WAS GOOD THEN

     AND JUST AS GOOD FOR MAN NOW

     FOR COURTESY AND CHIVALRY WERE CODES

     TO LIVE BY, WHEN DISCIPLINE AND ORDER RULED THE DAY

     AMONG ADULTS AND KIDS AT PLAY


     WHEN CHILDREN SHOULD BE SEEN

     AND NOT HEARD, OR IS IT THE OTHER WAY ROUND

     AND SIX O'CLOCK WAS SUPPER TIME

     NO EATING BEFORE GRACE WAS SAID

     AND WHOLE FAMILIES SAT AT THE TABLE'S FARE


     REQUEST POLITELY TO LEAVE THE TABLE

     ONLY SPEAK WHEN SPOKEN TO, WITH ADULTS AROUND

     AND TABLE MANNERS AND ETIQUETTE

     WAS PRACTISED ALWAYS TO SHOW YOUR KIND

     AND THANK YOU'S AND PLEASE'S WERE THE NORM


     RESPECT FOR YOUR ELDERS RULED OVERALL

     WITH DON'T DO AS I DO, DO ONLY AS I SAY

     STAND UP WHEN A LADY ENTERS THE ROOM

     WHEN BOWS AND CURTSY'S WERE IN DEMAND

     AND BREEDING AND CULTURE COUNTED MORE


     WHEN FOREBEARS WERE LORD POMPOUS AND SIR MUCKUS

     AND PANTALOONS AND BOWS WERE FOR GIRLS

     AND SHORT PANTS AND BOW-TIES FOR THE BOYS

     WITH SOCKS PULLED UP TO JUST BELOW THE KNEES

     OH YES! PLUM PUDDINGS AND WELSH RARE-BIT WERE THE TREATS.

                              



Premium Member News Clips - Post Scripts

D. Trump
     we dumped

     Ted Cruz
     you lose

     Cuomo
     should go

     Newsom's*
     gruesome

     Biden's
     hidin'

     Faucci's
     grouchy

     Meghan's
     ragin'

     Harry's
     scary

     Queen Mom's
     aplomb

     Prince Charles
     just snarls

     ISIS
     crisis

     Iran
     new bomb

     Kim Jong
     King Kong

     Bit coin
     come join

     T-bonds
     abscond

     Oil price
     up twice

     Brit Spears
     cry tears

     Doc Seuss
     cut loose

     Big Dance*
     short pants
  
     Sis Jean*
     Prom Queen

______________________________________________________
*Notes:
  Newsom - California governor whom voters are trying to recall
  The 'Big Dance' is a nickname for the NCAA basketball tourney,
which begins this week.
   Sis Jean is Sister Jean, a 101 year-old nun who works at Loyola
University, which made the 'Big Dance' for the second time in the
last four years. At age 98, she accompanied the team to the 'Dance,'
sat on the bench, hugged and cheered players, even gave them 
advice(!) and Loyola came made it to the Final Four! Wow! This year, 
she's going back again, at 101! What a gal!

Abnormality

Abnormality

God knows I don’t want to be normal
I want to stick out in a crowd
You have everyone look at me
And have them ask, “what in the hell is that”
I never want to wear a suit and tie
I want to go out in short pants and a muscle shirt
Black in color with a big dragon head on the front
I want to go into Macca’s and order a Whopper
And drink a forty year old New Coke
While eating a whole case of Twinkies
I never want to comb my hair or trim my beard
I want to wear glasses Elton John would turn down
I want to listen to the William Tell Overture
With lyrics added from Vanilla Ice
Maybe drive the wrong way on the freeway
Or hitchhike in the middle of the road
God knows I don’t want to be normal
I just want to be me
With all my quirks and strangeness 
So accept me for who I am
Because I am not going to ever change
No matter who or what
I will always be the best me I can be

Before It Rains

Surely,   it will rain
The rigged erosion site
Will yield up the graves
With the mangled duffers
We must see

I cannot stop the rain
The cast is already overused 
The thunder lines have marked 
Out themselves in the sky
Bidding for time

Oh!  it will surely rain
It will rain the hard beetles
Resplendent  at the castle 
Their strange tangles with
Cruelty and promise
Will evaporate

About our virgins
They  lost their seals 
They  walked provokingly
In short pants and bustiers.
Rods of derision pierced
And so they should walk 
As they like.

Before it rains, My Dear 
Goats will lose their shame
But they must never  be allowed 
To scud to the rock, and
Ridicule quest for an account.

After the rains, My Dear
The survivors will be happy
The losers will be happy
The spectators will be happy
They would all have learnt
From  the  rains.

Short-Pants Potentate

Short-Pants Potentate


Inferno of a summer day
Mother’s dozing

Tommy, tiny, three,
paring knife in hand

tiptoes out, flops
short-pants potentate

upon the sidewalk sunny,
operates on ants


Donal Mahoney

Premium Member I'M the Man - In Trump's Own Words

I will very very probably do it again
Anyone who knows me and has a brain
Can see that Biden's old and lame
Now's the time to reignite my reign.

MAGA folks love me and want me back
They need our country set on track
For what I have all others lack
Of running stuff they know sweet jack.

As to DeSantimonius, Short Pants Pence and Chippy Cheney
That they'll burn out I'll wage you money
I'm the one that's smart and funny
My golden touch makes all things sunny.

So once these midterms are sown up
I'll squeeze lame Joe just like a bug
Show the world that he's a dud
For I’m the man, I know it in my gut.

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