Best Clothes Poems

~TAKE MY MONEY ~

Crimson Joy, L'Oreal Lips, DOLCE & GABBANA eyewear 
Mascara from beyond LONDON Bridges
Like the pretty face found in front of Vanity Fair
What...

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There’s a party tonight so I bouffe up my hair
Pamper and powder my sweet derrière,
Arrive at the door, all done up to impress.....
Oh man, I...

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Sue’s panties gave her so much woe -
She suffered from dire ‘camel toe’
But with help from soft plastic
Her new outline’s fantastic
It’s discrete and no one...

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For a man of the cloth, our dear vicar
is not very partial to clothes
He is almost allergic to trousers
and y-fronts get right up his nose.

Ev’ry...

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In January’s chill, my woe is exposed 
Like a mesh of rough woolen lint
Hanging on thick icicles when hours pale ;
As brittle fleece of dreariness
Grips...

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Poor Viv got caught in his loo 
(Was sporting his pink tutu) 
His Mrs. was mad 
Said you ‘stupid lad - 
your hairy thighs still...

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He arrived wearing pink skinny jeans
They were scruffy and ripped at the seams
He looked like a wiener
I will not be meaner
But he’s sure not the...

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Olivia Newton John
A stunning sex bomb
Starred in the film Grease
Talk of ‘ those pants’ never cease!

I wonder how she managed to dance
In skin-tight shiny black...

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I’m lunching with my bestie Mylie
She’s upset and no longer smiley
I ask her what’s wrong
She said in my thong
My bottom is no match for Kylie!

I...

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My shoes lie prone like dogs waiting for a new adventure
Will it be a soft seashore shuffle?
A jaunt through the mall, all dusty with grime
A...

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I went to the shops with my bride,
Our nakedness we didn’t hide,
We followed what folk ask -
Just wear gloves and a mask,
Both bereft, we stood...

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There was a man with many hats,
that lived in a house with his cats.
When he went outside,
the cats stayed inside.
Hat choosing was driving him bats.

One...

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A is for Aprons, like Moms used to wear.
B is for Barrettes that adorn young girls’ hair.

C is for Coats, many colors and styles.
D is...

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People make me smile the way 
their eyes shine when they talk 
about something they love 
when they feed me food. Or tell 
me how...

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Black Bird
Sitting on a wire
Why is your back turned towards me?
Do you wish to hide the intelligence of your eyes,
or do you wish to create...

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