Best Grammar Poems

I am a curled up comma
When I sleep, so give me pause.
I’m sentenced to insomnia
Which grips me in its clause.

I’m subject to a poor night’s rest;
That’s predicated on
The fact that I have tossed and turned
Each night that’s come and gone.

Don’t question if I’m in control
Or...

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Grammar

When it comes to grammar
I always break the rules
I am from the old school
I never adhere to the “do and don’t
 I am a devious character indeed... oh! guess what!

 My Dali lama teaching
Was never influential because
Nothing else matters to me

I am who I am...

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Brutus said to Cicero, “Hang on, let me get this straight-
A Hypernym's a collective noun?” “No, no”, said Cicero, “wait-
I'll give you an example if you let me have a minute,
'Weapon' is a Hypernym and all the hardware in it,
the swords, tridents, ballistas that are...

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I know the fact that it's Facebook
it somehow gives you an excuse not to abide
by even the most basic of grammar rules.
And I admit seeing an apostrophe
where it's not needed kills me a bit inside.
But, alas, I will restrain myself
from starting any spelling duels.
The truth...

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THE STRANGE CASE OF THE PREPOSITION 

The preposition is a peculiar case
No use on its own by itself with no function
It needs an attachment to have any place
Alone would decease, be due extreme unction

Now some words may act without others at hand
Such as Nouns as...

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Rote an esay
Cheked IT twise
Lot's a' mistakes
Graide not so nice...

I yused comas
Perfetley placed paws
"2 much incoheeseivenes"
I cant, brake up a, claws

Yused fulstops.
not tolong a .sentense
But teecher. was furryous
Marked down with a venjance

Did exclamashons!
Sumtimes .3 @ once!!!!
& YUSED CAPS 2 SHOUT!!
Butt "you ownly need one,!!"

Coalon,
Wen I...

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The Grammar Nazis Will Get You

By Elton Camp

The grammar police are on patrol
Writings they seldom will extol

For how can they possibly commend
A preposition at a sentence’s end

Your write they have so much hated
For it violated a rule now antiquated 

Should a comma be put out...

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GRAMMAR   ALWAYS   RULES


If if and and were pots or pans
There would be fewer conjunctions 

But when  because  or  some such word
Was changed  into utensil it became  absurd

For although since the demise of if and and
There have...

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The curse of grammar

The curse of grammar includes spelling
Witches and wizards stewed it from far away
They’d like to make your heads sway
They used eyes of cats
Boiling them in copper pots
The refined magic brew is spread as chemtrails
Unclearly set spelling rules make us clumsy
Uncertain article rules...

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Veni, vidi, vici
Julius conquers us
The imperators' command and rule
Inflation and decay ends Roman Britain
Their legacy inhabits our grammar
Should reigns supreme
Over would and could...

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Durin' my shaky academic career I was an 'A' pupil in gym and art,

But when it came to parsin' sentences, my grades just fell apart!

I could never get the drift or hang of puzzlin' English grammar,

Tho' teachers tried to pound such in my skull with...

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I abhor
Those that feel it’s their chore
To toilet paper my creative door
With their opinions that lack color
I’d rather hear a walrus snore
If not for self expression what’s poetry for

By Robb A. Kopp
All Rights Reserved © MMX...

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The Grammar Years


On that train an hour ago, 
though he did not see me,
I saw a teacher I had years ago,
a proper man was he

who in the margins of my papers
wrote short sermons in a script
so perfect and so neat
they looked like samplers.

But on that...

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“Ringo Starr” is your popular name.
With it, you have achieved fame.
Few people know you as “Richard Starkey”.
That is the name you use legally.

You were the drummer for a four-piece band all would know.
However, you parted ways with them long ago.
From there, you became a solo...

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What is the past tense of Quit?

 a. Quitted
 b. Quitten
 c. Quitude
 d. Quittined
 e. None of the above

 Which of the following is the correct meaning of Alacrity

 a. Stubborn, unwilling
 b. Alarming, Surprising
 c. Mediocrity
 d. Eagerness
 e. None of the above

...

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