Confessions of a Grammar Nazi
I know the fact that it's Facebook
it somehow gives you an excuse not to abide
by even the most basic of grammar rules.
And I admit seeing an apostrophe
where it's not needed kills me a bit inside.
But, alas, I will restrain myself
from starting any spelling duels.
The truth is you just wouldn't win,
not even the slightest chance.
And even if you did there would be
no satisfaction on your behalf.
It would always come back again
to the same redundant dance;
me - taking the time to voice my message clearly,
and you having a big hair-pulling laugh.
It's true, there is a great deal of time saved,
cutting the words short and omitting punctuation.
But by God it's like throwing away
years of hard-earned education!
I wouldn't mind writing like a five-year-old
(aside from the fact I'm almost twenty).
Some say it's nothing to fret about -
isn't the rest of the world's problems plenty?
The fact is writing is one of the few things
I can keep in order
(Lord knows my room doesn't fit the bill!).
So if by chance you find yourself,
staring zombie-eyed Into a computer screen,
with extra time to fill,
I hope that you will remember your I before E except C's,
that you will recall the three different there's of English.
Maybe someday you too will join
this small club of Grammar Nazis.
Perhaps you'll find there's more to words
than just ink on a page...
For you have the whole world within you,
first step is too climb out of your cage.
Copyright © Timothy Hicks | Year Posted 2013
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