I can't do it
My heart tries
But the bee
Is where my rose lies
The River flows
Giving life to all
But the snake
Is where my eyes fall
The snow offers joy
So many sledding on slopes
But the pending danger
Is where my hope ropes
...and I hang on for dear life
Life...that's a laugh
Where is living in dying
Try as I might, my system
Forbids access to what desire is buying
I press my pen against paper
Demanding it write out my joy
But it sighs and retracts
Sighting all effort as a ploy
My pen is right, there's no point
In writing about what I haven't known
I'm told a great harvest is coming
For the many good seeds I have sown
...and I wait in the patience my tent now holds
Written by Trudy Schrader on 08-30-2026
A constant urge
Gnawing, relentless, overwhelming
It preys on my mind
Refusing to let its guard down
But I keep my defences strong
My soldiers fight to their last breath
Every battle a defiance
A rejection of your concrete ways
Try as I might
My castle will never be satisfactory
My cavalry, my strength, my empire
Will never match your desires
But my longings
My desires
Live on
And I refuse to live this way
To tiptoe, to whisper
To silence my voice at the mercy of your thunderous demands
To obey you at the expense of myself
Thin Mints, an oxymoron
Heavy Mints is spot on
I think willpower deserves a badge
Never can eat just one
My goal? To make a Scouts’ pledge
I hem and haw and hedge
No more cookies, I wail
Try as I might I fail
So I eat the whole sleeve instead
Morning Sonnet
The news this morning was something new
Greece has a banana plantation near
Mount Olympus, and they are yellower and
bigger than bananas from Greenland
A British surgeon pleaded guilty to cutting
off his legs to satisfy a sexual need
Try as I might, I struggle to understand how
The removal of legs can be sexually necessary
On Thursday next week, they are removing
a growth on my left side, can the surgeons
be trusted to find and remove the cyst
Ghostly fear forms, a dark gossamer web,
caged my consciousness once cradled by bliss
but try as I might, my pain did not ebb,
hurtling me down a bottomless abyss.
Feeling grief-stricken, situation grave,
my weary, groaning soul godforsaken,
searched for heaven’s gate, so that God may save
me from dark despair that left mind shaken.
Trauma bonding with fear no more, I paused,
shifting to heart, pushing open love’s gate,
engulfed in bliss mists, pure intent had caused,
breath by breath reshaping my earth life fate.
Walking the path of light, God-search I start ~
He dwells in the cave of my glowing heart
Lately, nothing seems to be going right.
Sorrow spills from my heart every night.
Try as I might, I simply fail to understand
why my tears gather like grains of sand.
I'm hanging on for dear life, but how I miss
the love we shared. I've fallen into an abyss,
and in the distance I watch the sun as it sets,
filled with forlorn emotions and rueful regrets.
I've lost my verve for living and paying the price
for listening to my sad heart's quixotic advice.
Miscellaneous, multifarious
These were my musings, mixed and various
Poems that were happy, poems so sad,
Left me heartbroken or cheerily glad.
Poems about people and nature and such
Sometimes I wonder if it’s all been too much
Questions arise as I struggle to find
The perfect balance of poetic kind
Are the lines a bit short? or are they too long?
Is the meaning too deep? or simply a song?
Is it telling the truth, or telling a lie?
Or wild imagination out on the fly?
Rubbish or nonsense, it’s all much the same
I won’t even try to give it a name
Once I would write, I would write every day
Then something happened, and it all went away
And try as I might, it is hard to regain
To coax fine words from an unwilling brain
Other poets I read, whose wise poems shine.
What on God’s good green earth happened to mine?
It’s been a long time, some ten years or more.
Perhaps a bit less, I’m not keeping score
But I’ll keep on trying in this the new year.
And hope that my muse will seek me out here
So this is my goal. I would like you to know.
Is it attainable? I surely hope so.
Try as I might
I've lost the might to try
see her, you see
That distant part of me
Never to be lonely
In the mind of my "one and only"
Omare in her sight
Feelings are aflight
Jousting for attention
try as i might
She will not ignore me
Nore has she ceased caring
Transparency of my love
I am undeserving see
A crisp brown leaf from the sycamore tree
Silently fell to the ground
It gently lay down amidst more of its kind
Having landed with no hint of sound
How could it know of the silence required
To survive through the night in these woods
I’d crunched one such leaf underfoot in my haste
And fell prey to the people in hoods
The moon though dim, waxing gibbous, I think
Throws monochrome shades in the night
Against this old oak I am helpless and tied
There’s no escape, try as I might
What did they mean, “That’s her gluttony sated”?
No woman I see hereabout
My knees feel weak as shrivelled leaves crunch
And they fail as that dull moon…… goes out
When I was younger and thought of old age
Thought we all became senile at this elderly stage
It appears I was wrong, I can still go potty
And able to dress this tired old body
Try as I might, I don't see very well
And my wobbly old legs are as shaky as hell
Sometimes my words come out like a squeak
Other times I whistle when trying to speak
Have a secret my young whipper snappers
It's as good as it gets except for my bladder
It seems to be constantly wanting attention
I don't have a problem with pee retention
So now that I've told you what to expect
I must tell you all it's as good as it gets
Enjoy your youth cause it's downhill from here
You'll soon be old and decrepit I fear
I ordered a sandwich in a corner cafe.
I remember like it was only yesterday,
How my close friend solemnly bowed his head to say,
“Something has happened to Merry.”
When the subject came up, he was so badly shook,
And his eyes dropped down - he was unable to look.
“What was it?”, I asked - to find out, I undertook,
What was it that happened to Merry?
“Is it something too horrible for you to say?
I should know of all people, your friend, don’t betray.
So, tell me right now, please, in all candor, convey
The dire matter in the life of Merry?”
Try as I might, the truth, I just could not pry it.
It seemed spec’ly to me; he would not supply it.
Leaving me in a state of dread and disquiet,
Wondering, what ghastly thing happened to Merry?
Here and there, when I occasioned to see a friend,
I’d see horrified looks, as the chat would suspend,
But up to now, and maybe even in the end,
I’ll be asking, “What was it that happened to Merry?”
Troubled times,
Awful rhymes,
I cannot write,
Try as I might
Words won't come
Fingers drum
Look up in the air
No words of wisdom there
Fuzzy brain
Going insane
No longer sure
Of anything anymore
Spelling muddled
Mind befuddled
I despair
There are no words of wisdom there
Brain thwarted
Mind distorted
All senses have gone haywire
Feeling cold now
Getting old now
I need some strength to light my fire.
It's happened again, dammit
And try as I might
Spring cleaning's an urge
I just cannot fight
I need a remedy NOW
For this kind of addiction
As I'm down on my knees
Scrubbing the kitchen
It's a terrible affliction
An absolute blight
I started at dawn
Now it's late in the night
The days been a blur
A whirlwind of cleaning
A hysterical enthusiasm
Untempered by reasoning
But when it's all done and dusted
And (temporarily) neat as a pin
I'll be pleased I gave into the urge
And sit down with a gin
My entire life, I have ran
Avoided, buried, ignored
A wound that could never heal
Try as I might to not see
At times, it would appear
Weeping...oozing pit pain
Down in the dungeon
It is hot, isolation, so cold
It's hard to sit, where it is
Soul sear, burns and rips
Leaving tears to flow like a river
Desolate...no one to drink
Longings grow out of silence
Imagination runs in green lush fields
On the back of my trusted steed
I soared through visions of freedom
The wind whipping through my hair
Matted...abrupt reality of despair
Even after He came, lifting me up
Totally restoring the scarred soul
The ache screamed, piercing the darkness
When I left all the abuse for LOVE
My whole being longed to be pursued
Anger...great wrath is all you could muster
For daring to leave you alone.....
Written by Trudy Schrader on 11-25-2023
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