Aristotle, doth he opine,
That parrots grow saucy with wine.
I can't help but think
He drove it to drink,
The source of its moral decline.
We were learning to play bridge, and it was okay I guess.
I always outbid everyone at the table including sister Tess.
Mom and Dad took one each of us, “you get that twin.”
We always took them down, rarely would we win.
One day when the rest of them were away from the table
Sassy joker jumped into my lap and said “I shall call you Mable”.
The glint in his eye said “Let’s be a couple, you little minx!”
I was so shocked, I threw him under the couch cushion, pink.
Where is the joker? Asked Mom as she put the cards away.
I professed not to know, but picked him up the very next day.
Let me sleep under your pillow tonight, the saucy joker said.
I was horrified, but thrilled too, as I took him to my bed.
We were learning to play bridge, and it was okay I guess.
I always outbid everyone at the table including sister Tess.
Mom and Dad took one each of us, “you get that twin.”
We always took them down, rarely would we win.
One day when the rest of them were away from the table
Sassy joker jumped into my lap and said “I shall call you Mable”.
The glint in his eye said “Let’s be a couple, you little minx!”
I was so shocked, I threw him under the couch cushion, pink.
Where is the joker? Asked Mom as she put the cards away.
I professed not to know, but picked him up the very next day.
Let me sleep under your pillow tonight, the saucy joker said.
I was horrified, but thrilled too, as I took him to my bed.
Saucy Sally, sits solemnly on said sidewalk,
Stifling sniffles, sees sympathetic staring,
Some snidely shuffling slowly sideways, so
She surreptitiously swallows her sadness.
Studly Sam, strolling six shaggy sheepdogs,
Soon seizes on saucy Sally’s situation, and
Saunters steadily, still standing; swiftly,
Suggests she stifle her sniveling sadness.
Suddenly, she’s sharing six shaggy sheepdogs,
Silently, Sam says, sweet saucy Sally stay.
Written August 18, 2022
FIRST PLACE WINNER
Submitted to "Alliteration - Old or New" Poetry Contest
Sponsored by Joseph May
August 30, 2022
The Halloween queen puts cement in tarts
A crafty way to bond with a man’s heart
One tart is enough to stiffen one’s bits
Witches have such extraordinary gifts.
This witch is not of the usual sort
Casting of spells is not par for the course
She’s a thriller, cement is her filler
The tarts she makes are her for sure killer.
Some men can’t resist the charms of a witch
Dressed up to the nines, quite an exhibit
With the skill of seduction, they mesmerise
Promising their suitors the time of their lives.
With tarts appealing, simply delicious
The men are won over and lubricious.
Taking all that’s on offer, however
A moment’s pleasure, they’re gone forever.
Halloween - 2021
Pat the Nonagenarian
No one would guess Pat was over ninety
She'd had pins and tucks, is trim and lively
With implanted bust
Inflated buttocks
She drives men crazy, undeniably.
That is till they get her into the sack
Pat can't raise a smile as her face would crack
Her buttocks and bust
Pop when they are touched
Sadly for Pat no man ever comes back.
26th May 2021
Nell’s Bells
Bren's often to be found around at Nell’s
Who's bosoms dangle down like big church bells
To peals of delight
They go on all night
Whilst their neighbours cannot sleep for Nell's Yells.
23rd May 2021
There was a damsel beautiful
The fairest in the land, and she --
As saucy as a wench could be
Her teeth shone white, her lips carefree...
She gave out kisses two by two
Red ruby lips and tongue at play
One kiss for me, the next for you
We twitterpated, you might say
But then one day, a tragedy
Affecting every man in town
The damsel, bitten by a bee
Her lips, dear me, had turned to brown
No more her ruby wares displayed
To rest all naughty whispers laid
_________________________________
'Twitterpated' is a term from the Walt
Disney classic, 'Bambi,' meaning 'head
over heals in love.'
tactic theories tamed
by moaning brain
callous crescendoes' bait
airy acumen craved
felon feasts fostered
hoity twin triggered
rusty rules reeled
raging rumple reek
punctured politics' spree
dark dances dribbled
saucy syllables scribbled
did curves cripple
lanky lust birthed
vying veil's verge.
'20:03:21:11:01
Note: Dedicated to Plato.
tactic theories tamed
by moaning brain
callous crescendoes' bait
airy acumen craved
felon feasts fostered
hoity twin triggered
rusty rules reeled
raging rumple reek
punctured politics' spree
dark dances dribbled
saucy syllables scribbled
did curves cripple
lanky lust birthed
vying veil's verge.
'20:03:21:11:01
Note: Dedicated to Plato.
When we stirred the pot
Mum pulled out the wooden spoon
Could one of you clowns
Be so kind…Get me some hot
sauce for my hash browns
/center>
Springtime’s saucy sweet;
makes me want egg rolls,
fried rice with veggies,
curlicue sprouts;
with fried shrimp for dipp’in.
Of course, with smiling fortune cookie!
I know I do this every time I think of you
I end up with a stiff little pickle and in a flipping mess
Now I know you think it’s saucy and like to have a laugh
But I’m the one with spicy piccalilli all over my flaming lap
I relish the challenge in being a pickle in a tight squeeze
For this little pickle marinades himself in honey from a bee
You may think that a pickle and honey wouldn’t go together
But I can rest assure you they are actually the spice of life
A condiment together, and though you chutney sometimes
I always relish dipping my little pickle in your honey pot
Can’t wait to savoury spread your legs and syrup my pickle in
For honey you are the sweetest dessert that there’s ever been.
ps: If you ever need to find me I’ll be in the supermarket isle - savouries and sauces.
Sweet and sour sauce
Drizzled on your dreams
Adds a spicy tang to
Imaginary ice creams!
Sub Categories
Looking for the formal definition, structure, and history of this poetry form? Visit the Poetry Dictionary entry below. Then return to explore how PoetrySoup members bring the form to life through their own poems.