Rumors abound
All around town
Lily White
Needs a knight
She is tangled
Being wrangled
By the tricky trees
Planted by Peacocks from Leeds
Wolves are down under
Hearing wraths thunder
Drinking Burnley claret wine
Getting ready to do second tier time
In comes the Hammer girl
Wearing expensive pearls
Bought using Gallo credit
Wondering, ‘will anyone get it?’
Message, ‘relegate’
Easier opponents await
Fans will have reason to cheer
Dousing the same expensive beer
As players work on maturing skills
Crunching numbers, paying the bills
Oh yes, who is going to get dropped
Commentating, ‘our season truly was a flop’
Officially closing the show
Taking the athletic production to parts unknown
Goal now ‘will want to come back’
Claiming healed healthy, surviving a relegation attack
I grew up living in the countryside
an only child, adopted and on my own
it's something I've never regretted at all
looking back now like a river with one stone
I found I could cope with myself
having a stammer people was not my thing
so I found ways to spend my time
a lover of football it became my wedding ring
Across from our backyard was a field
'The Honie' was its name, there I did play
on my own, a football and me my all
many an hour spent no matter wet or grey
The grass never got cut but I kept it down
with my ball, me and team imagination
doing everything a team does as one
win and lose but never got relegation
I did love 'My Homie'
a place to spend many an hour
so many memories to call upon
drawing them from above like a shower
(This is written about my favourite place in my childhood and the memories it has for me.
Football - means soccer as we play it in the UK.)
Citizens were upset
With the Honey Hornets set
They played dance songs
But it was all wrong
Records being abused
Scratching them when used
Stingers created a vibe
That said let the music die
Before the first forty five ended
Twilight Zone Rod should be commended
Two for Stirling
Hometown hive was swirling
Only to see another pair go by
Relegation staring bees straight in the eye
Four score
Sky Blue headed for the door
“Nice seeing you here
Will be playing for champions league cheer
In the coming year
Tabloid stuff did not work
Honesty was how we popped the cork”
Later in the day Gunners held fire
While Aston’s Villa was put on the tight wire
If this was the end to the show
Arsenal would let them know
First half saw one in
Enough for a claret blue army crucial win
This allowed a table jump
To safety over buzzing hump
No need reporting anything new
Except the canary could be dining on honey dipping stew
In the dungeon
Doing some number crunching
Asking themselves why did we go to that high profile luncheon
Where we did all the munching
Staring out at the bridge
Empty was his fridge
In a United Kingdom dungeon
World crumbling
Canary needed attention
Wondering about pension
Off to Stamford he went
Figuring out how to pay the rent
When he arrived Chelsea honestly tried
And before the brake
A goal they did make
Leaving Canary with nothing
Except relegation while huffing
Then puffing
Keeping it close
Canaries did not roast
Dreaming a shot went through
Everything would be level between the two
It did not happen
And Canary returned home flapping
Pensioners gave the song birds a chance
To perform a shirtless dance
Leaving them with a thought
After they fought
Saying, “We are back on top
Not ready to stop
Winners of the lower division
More mature then those having high profile missions”
Next time when things are down and out
Remember this lesson to think about
Do something with that pension check
And tomorrow there could be successful respect
Thackray thought up a plan
To get three points for the west hams
Called upon Antonio to do a task
“Fetch my friend a theatrical mask
Tell the canary meet for a luncheon
Of course at his dungeon
There will be no bubbles to burst
Only an answer to why Miss Thackray was cursed”
Antonio took the orders
Did contact a reporter
Hornet Daily decided to decline
Meeting with the royals from the new castle on their mind
Evenly spread out
Antonio very calm no need to shout
Four across the board
Before shutting the door
Royals in the new castle
Felt this get together was a hassle
Found a goal early
Surely,
This would separate the west ham from the buzz
Staying united as they always was
Claiming two fouls
Hornets’ staff went to print with a howl
Still on the hammy’s heels
Not investigating if Thackray will ever get another deal
Antonio returned
Successful not burned
Thackray now felt at ease
No longer relegation a tease
Taking a shot of Claret wine
Things getting a good sign
“I will not stalk alone”
Thackray reminder herself in a British tone
There was a buzz in the air
About Astin’s upcoming weekend affair
A Friday night match
Where Astin was such a catch
Lured in with bait
Wolves prowling looking great
But alas a mistake
A correction needed to make
Someone wanted cake
Decided to change plans to an afternoon luncheon
Wolves and Astin hiring catering for the munch on
Bags were packed at the Canary’s pad
Waiting for a downtown cab
Going to a positive place
Maybe a championship to build a successful case
When it heard
From a news worthy credible bird
Hornets did not distance themselves from the demotion third
Apparently a few glasses of Claret wine
Relaxed the stingers at the time
When the clock struck seventy three
Hornets grabbed the honey for a spot of tea
In the ball it went
After the purple and red posted it sent
One to nothing
Shutting them out which was something
Leaving the relegation decision tight
Making the next footbally month a competitive fight
Right?
today the past is now present
jarring brass voices carry weight
high-pitched illustrations
shutter light from daybreak dawn
future tenses refuse reflection
engineering a blinding bluff
seeking slogans fruitful echoes
crisp loud voices snap rebuff
the past passed to relegation
discreetly forecasts novelty
waiting for fresh perspective
voices laced with parody
language marred messaging
puzzling pundits pontificate
message mongers stifle voices
waiting for the phoenix to rise
mis’ry merchants manufacture
crafted paper pledges
baiting dunces to suicide
bards, poets and manic court jesters
silver-tongued foxes oft’ report
incestuous machinations
chilling wind numbs the dying
lying flaccid vocally bound
blinded targets hear no warnings
the deaf fall with no reprieve
parents dance to order
children chant a mantra’s song
in droplets
oceans swell
Something happened that shook the ground
The Hammies were victory bound
Two goals up late in the game
They thought the words of relegation would be tamed
Suddenly, the seagulls started to pest
Not allowing the Hammies a rest
Finding the net, a goal closer the Seagulls did get
Only a few minutes later a bright move was made not using a hand
And the incident put more leverage into the relegation plan
This review situation scene made West Ham yell and scream
What is this said the marooned fan another video replay scam?
All level and if this keep up the Londoners will spend a year with the British futbol devil
Relegation haunts those who play at the Olympic home and this situation is like being biblically stoned
On the bright side
And this is no lie
A whole new league could invade, and they could have much EPL information to trade
Also, if West Ham makes the drop
The losing may stop
Leaving West Ham England Champion on top
Where were you last year
Back in relegation I did hear
Have your beer with your cheer
West Ham will level it soon
Under this Friday Night moon
Hammies gave it a try
And it would have worked if someone did not let out a cry
First time that the ball went into the net
The boss on the sidelines dropped a flag it wasn’t time yet
Offsides was the call there was a violation in the futbol law
With one on the board the Blades needed not another score.
Hammies played them tough trying to draw even feeling that would be enough
And then it happened, an aggressive move on the enemy side
With a nice kick the ball was giving a ride.
In it went and the players celebrated knowing full time was almost spent.
Once again there was a complaint
And after a review the athletic feat was not done by a saint.
The Blades player had physical contact
Which told the Hammies it was time to pack
After watching this I must say
It was 2-1 Hammies if the goals were okay
But fouls were committed and the Hammies bit it
Now that the match was done, and The Blades won
It should be noted it was the Hammies who were the ones that made the two hours fun
Today West Ham Went Berserk
And Bournemouth Lost Its Shirt
No Need for A Cover
Since Jason Was Sent Home to His Mother
So Far, Its Four
That the Hammies Have Scored
This Will Put A Little Space
In the Stay Out of Relegation Race
A New Coach Is Here In Spirit
And The Supporters Let Them Hear It
Hopefully He Knows How To Steer
As Everyone Cheers
But Honestly What Will West Ham Do
With This Athletic Job That Was Real Cool
An Olympic Year Is Hear, What Could Be the Fear
Must It Be Chatter About Building Costs That Matter
With the Stadium Finished in Japan
West Ham May Want to Make Good with Its Fan
Money and Goals Are Hard to Come
And We Enjoy These Two Things Since They Are Fun
So, Keep It Going My Dear Hammies
And Next Time Lets Do Another Slammy
For the Enjoyment of The Fannies
Arsenal first Friday, always start well
New signings too, will give Leicester hell
Arsenal easy, next,
Liverpool in the early game, a win at a canter
Watford offer up more presents than Santa
Arsenal easy, Liverpool canter, next,
Chelsea at the Bridge a cert to crush Burnley
Untouchable last season, this is money for free
Arsenal easy, Liverpool canter, Chelsea a cert, next,
Man City away win, there’s simply no reason
Why Brighton won’t be relegation fodder this season
Arsenal easy, Liverpool canter, Chelsea a cert, Man City away, next,
Spurs to cane Newcastle, big gap in class
Don’t think the magpies are gonna last
Arsenal easy, Liverpool canter, Chelsea a cert, Man City away, Spurs pure class, last,
Man United on fire, all glitz and glamour
Scoring for fun, gonna stuff the hammers
Arsenal easy, Liverpool canter, Chelsea a cert, Man City away, Spurs pure class, United on fire,
Fifty quid on a six-fold, what could possibly go wrong
.
.
Arsenal Nil Leicester 1
.
.
Damn
Bluesy woman carry my tune
rasped in relegation
of a crying crimson moon
Forge forth steps of beaten breath
left alone in trepidation
destined to outdistance death
Blast out those baby blues
seep past storms of surrender
climbing barriers broken out by you
Bat your eyes and croon your cries
let your soul come play for me
build me up in a knock down world
in every simple note you bleed
must refuse relegation, obey
only the roar of our own angels, then reshape
breastplates to shield the motherland
from any warlord who dares
to pimp our flag.
Battlefields have always been a woman’s place,
We were born to bleed, to fight-
off advances, to heal from the inside-out.
We, nasty, nasty women
who dare castrate filibusters, know grit,
audacity, the combat for higher grounds.
History is lit by an army of fiery
heroines, burnt at stakes by low-life
aristocrats, suckling-pig-kings.
We, Nasty women rise from ashes
to become better-armed daughters,
knightmares, hallowed witches on frontlines,
glorious, undefeated legends.
After Jeanne d'Arc et Saint-Michel by Eugene Thirion, painting seen above
If you go to Villa Park
You'll be in for a lark.
From kickoff the opposition will look on fire
But that is because Villa are so dire.
The goals go in one two three four
By halftime it could end as a cricket score.
The Villa fans slide down in their seat
Knowing they are heading for another defeat.
Thinking there is no inspiration
And heading closer to relegation
Twenty minutes to go the fans head for home
They have to face work with no safety zone.
But don't expect me to take pity
Because I support Leicester City.
Haiku version
Sad Villa fans. Cry
Relegation looms. Bottom.
Leicester fans smile. Top.
This day I have much to say
To say “I do” is long over due,
Pressure has turned to treasure,
As relegation transformed into relaxation,
Gossip is now a floral of roses,which
Makes our foes to swallow shame as hexoses.
Her necklace glitters like corundum
which is a beautified addendum,
After waiting for four seasons
before going to the altar,
This union is going to be better,
For deep love is observed to the latter.
Pain has turned to gain,
and tears to ‘cheers!’ ,
Loneliness of the past is now blessing at last,
Being a groom today makes me bloom with joy,
As my bride walks towards me with pride,
Couple we are, couple we will be!,
From ages to ages without rage.
*Hexoses-six carbon sugars e.g glucose,fructose and galactose…
Sub Categories
Looking for the formal definition, structure, and history of this poetry form? Visit the Poetry Dictionary entry below. Then return to explore how PoetrySoup members bring the form to life through their own poems.