Best Tall Tale Poems

"Billy, it's time! Get up for school!
Your drawing project's due today.
You know about your teacher's rule;
she must have it without delay."

"But, mom, my arm is hurting bad!
There is no way that I can go.
I must stay home, though I am sad...
I'm really hurting, don't you...

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honest mum it wasn't me
I didn't take a nibble of the cake
it was just as I walked into the kitchen
I saw something move....mum....I did ...
was the biggest mouse you ever saw,
it was stealthily moving towards the cake
whiskers twitching, nose in the air
I watched amazed
then it...

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Come all ye, kiss that blarney stone
Join in the legend and be known
For the gift of gab
Ye come kiss the slab
Eloquence and luck shall be shown...

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I must say Peter, I've had the most extraordinary day. It all started when I woke up this morning. I was brushing my teeth with this new toothpaste Pepsibrite and literally after just a few minutes, I was amazed at how white my teeth became....

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Hi Mom. Sorry I'm late. I wanted to bring you something cuz I love you.
See, I was walking by the lake and saw this pretty flower waving at me.
It was like it was saying, "Hey Joey, take me home to your Mom."
It kept calling me...

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My big old dog had no tail         
He laid around because he was frail     
He ran away with June     
Frisky living on the moon   
Dinner is fried...

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On one summer night’s boldest game
We hunted and attacked vicious pirates,
Riding on bubble rafts of spokes and rubber
Our young skin caressed by the velvet air;
This mission devoted for an honored Celtic God.
Yielding our mighty wooden swords,
We protected the river to save the children
From all the...

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“HOSPITAL HUMP” 
(a tall tale – or not?)

The wind and the cold on the hill
they stood still
as two shadows arrived
near the peak
above what was known
as “Hospital Hump”
a devious, dastardly,
butt crushing bump.
So started the legend
a Grand-dad and Grand-son
who challenged the hill
“OH, just for fun!!”
The younger had...

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I worked with a lady called ‘Titch’
Though tiny, she was quite a witch
So bitter and twisted
Her faults can’t be listed
We re-named her the office *****!

Total fiction… I did have a boss we called the dodecahedron… let’s just say she was more than two faced lol

04~17~17...

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It's a cute and funny little tale
Or on the other hand
An amazing con
To fool little girls into thinking
That their lifelong fantasies 
and silly dreams
That their mothers fix in their heads
(I guess)
when they say:
'One day you'll meet your Prince charming
A nice, wonderful man
Who'll love you for...

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Dedicated to My Father with Endless Love

My child’s serious eyes targeted me as his prize.
I could see pondering and wondering forming words
for my small child’s mumbling.

“Mommy, Daddy says you’re short”, he spoke.
“People come in all sizes.”
“Will I come in short?” he questioned.
“Would you care?”
“Don’t think...

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A long time ago in a very distant past
A tall tale my remembering mind yet holds fast,
An intriguing story and it'll be a blast
Indeed, it’s a surprise that it should this long last.
Promise, I will begin right after the breakfast
And I say, I’ll get it...

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,A Skunk’s ‘Tale’,

Twas a puzzling mid-summer’s eve
When I became acquainted with Steve
Bear with if you can
For Steve’s not a man
He’s an odd little skunk who won’t leave!

I was driving, unwinding that night
As my headlights swam over his sight
On two legs he stood
Like he owned street...

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In the small fishing town of Tunafishlips
The competitors lined up all of their ships
The race for the biggest catch had begun
As they listened to how the last winner had won
With all eyes upon him, he began his tale…

“It was thiiiis big”, he announced with such...

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You may not tend to believe me 
Perhaps you’ll start to suddenly
Put your logic up on a shelf
Open your mind and let yourself
See things you never dared to see

The year here was 1901
An unknown battle had begun
No news on any TV show
Or Orson on the...

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