Best Pinch Poems

Yikes, all I feel is attitude with zero Christmas mood.
Blessed am I for Jesus’ birth and sacrificial rood,
but Santa and his deer had best just skip our roof
or I might very well rage out on every furry hoof.

All my Christmas feel of unique is long...

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A quick
Sharp
Pain in a vein
Barely notice it
Blood is drawn
Rushing from the vein
It feels unnatural
Leaving from your vein
But the pain is unnoticeable
as more leaves
A feeling of faint
The one drawing the blood
gives a kind look with their eyes
Taking more blood
worry sets in
Skin becomes ashen
vision blurs
More blood is...

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Today, I'll do my best to teach you
the recipe to keep Christmas true.
You'll need to start with a loving heart,
or else your plans will all fall apart.

Decorating a tree sets the mood;
so smile and indulge in Christmas food.
Eggnog and ribbon candy are fine,
also, uncork a...

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O help me!  I've fallen
And I can't get it up!
I'm stuck here acrawlin'
Up a Double-D cup

Now don't let us dicker
I am over the hill
Just be a mite quicker
Slipping me that blue pill!...

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Leather, rubber, PVC 
Synched waists, stiletto heels 
Chicken cutlets shoved in bras 
Body stocking, pantyhose 

Sitting around, TV on 
Laptops open 
Googling... 
Waiting 

For a sleaze bag 
To book a session 
Half hour, maybe more 
Fingers crossed 

The bell rings 
Door’s buzzed open 
Short, fat,...

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Great Italian Lovers                                          ...

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Pinch

Rarity often governs price, 
and availability 
more so, than the need,
and acceptance of what is on hand.

Pinch...

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Take life with a pinch of salt
So the old adage goes
So follow the advice
Take it from one who knows
Take life with a pinch of salt
Take it from a wise fella
Just follow it with a slice of lemon
And a good shot of tequila...

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OF ROY AND PINCH BANDITS

Claims Roy one day
to have been approached
by an angel of GOD
alleges the said angel
brought him news
news that he would pass to glory
complete with day and time...

Come the day... Roy
arranges meeting with cece..
.. his beloved siz..
Roy unable to confess..to cece..
the truth.. bout...

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A Different Pinch

Key left by Charlie Sheen
Allowed the theft of his Mercedes so keen.
Cops came like so many times before,
But this time he stayed to close his house door....

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A pinch of salt or even two
  never enough, just will not do

But let it rain down, pour it on in
  you'll get ulcers faster than with Mr. Clean

The sweet spot's somewhere in between ~
  sodium bicarbonate and 'buttered pretzelines'...

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On the Who Net a rumor was making its way
the mean old green Grinch planned to steal Christmas Day!

Cindy Lou Who(who was not more than two)
and all the Who kids knew just what they'd do.

Thus on Christmas Eve they all went to bed
like angels—parents didn't...

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Silly Dilly in pursuit of school
Always late which was not very cool
	Two legs in his pants
	Broke out in a dance
Oh, how that zipper was so damn cruel...

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Because I'm not wearing green on Saint Patrick's Day, a man gave me a pinch and I gave him a punch.
I hit that moron so hard in the stomach that he lost his lunch.
About an hour ago, another man pinched me and I kicked him...

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Irish tales of what a leprechaun gives away
If you don’t wear green on St Paddy’s Day 
a painful pinch
Like Suisse’s Grinch,
a green tie or  vest so invisible you’ll stay
               ...

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