A car was parked illegally;
The hydrant wasn’t cleared,
Plus it was by a nursing home
And might have interfered.
I never would have noticed it,
But signage did impart
That a tow truck would be coming
‘Cause the engine wouldn’t start.
Thee note said “Please!” perhaps to cops
Who rarely have the choice
About issuing a ticket to
A reprobate Rolls Royce!
My car stalled in the restaurant parking lot.
The waiter ran out,
To give me back my wallet.
I saw him waver from behind the restaurant window.
I have two identities.
I called the tow truck.
The driver told me what he thinks.
I feel the bumps in the rental car.
With me.
I’ve never been in the alternate dimension.
But the gravel I drive over has.
Driving in an unfamiliar car.
Becomes closer.
Slowing down but I wish…
My rental car stalled.
That’s what it’s like.
You rent a car, and rent a car, and rent a car.
A tow truck comes over, and over, and over.
Blue, green, red.
Cars I’ve driven in my head.
Waking up and I’m in Ohio.
I used to live there.
The other one.
I have two identities.
Me and the woman in the grey car.
She knew but said nothing.
I need to take my van.
Drive and get trapped in the sand.
Petals by my shaking feet.
A picnic basket appears for me to eat.
I tried to store too much in the back.
Until the seat started to crack.
Until the trunk started to open on its own.
I forgot to bring an ice cream cone.
The tide could come in anytime.
But for now, everything seems fine.
I checked my phone, no one’s called.
I had a beach chair and umbrella in my haul.
And a beach towel as well.
As the water starts to swell.
Someone else called the tow truck.
I tried to say I wasn’t even stuck.
I tried to convince them with ease.
But somewhere on the beach I dropped my keys.
Somewhere around here is paradise.
If I could see it, that would be nice.
Woke up this morning, it's one of those days.
I see the bright sunshine through a grey, misty haze.
My head hurts, my eyes burn, I hurt in some places,
That used to be located in different places.
Hobble to bathroom to soak in the tub,
And take ibuprophen in lieu of back rub.
Shampooed and relaxed I feel a bit peckish.
Some scones and some tea would make a nice breakfast.
No flour, no butter, my cupboard is bare.
I tell you this morning has started with flare.
I just grab a bite on the way to work.
Paid for donuts and coffee, spilled the cup on my shirt.
Got to work late so I stayed overtime.
Didn't get home until just before nine.
'Cause I had a flat tire and had no spare,
So I called a tow truck and had it repaired.
My neighbor came over with all of the news.
Sometimes that woman just gives me the blues.
She'll talk about anyone who isn't here.
Wonder who she talks about when I'm not there.
I finally flipped out and just had a cow.
It's good that I did 'cause I feel better now.
Tomorrow will be a much better day.
Today was a bad day, what more can I say.
Nighttime is the time when
things spill out of
a child's blanket..
a broken crayon
first day of school
a first hero
a talking frog
training wheels
a tiny tow truck
heart broken
driver's license
cell phone
never home
graduation.
Nighttime is the time when
things spill out of
a child's blanket...
Are tow-eds formally cars that got hitched
To the back of a “tow-truck” or is it a myth
Not sure about that
Must Google that fact
Somehow methinks something got switched
When the towns only tow truck breaks down, the not-yet repos have time to hide in the garage. While I am still stuck in the mud.
11/03/2019
Pithy Pome Poetry Contest
Sponsored by Maureen McGreavy
My favorite junkyard is in Chariton, Iowa.
A rusty old tow truck at the top of the hill
Painted to look exactly like Mater in the Cartoon.
When I approach the junkyard, I do with anticipation
And there he is. Sitting on the hill with his big eyed
cartoon smile, same goofy teeth.
It makes the rest of the junkyard seem happy
Which is fantastic if you can overlook all of the
beautiful cars and trucks that were once loved
But are now rusting away in depressive sadness.
There he is! I think miles before I arrive.
I am not sure what I will feel if the cartoon Mater
ever disappears. Today, at this second, I do not have to worry.
There is the goofy smile.
Assuring me that everything in the junk yard is okay.
The fireplace is roaring with a warm hot fire
With a light drift of snow covering the trees
29 degrees on this cold winter night
So quiet listening to the cracking fire and snapping
Not a thought was wondering through our minds
So tranquil and peaceful ones heart desires
With two glasses of wine placed upon the table
By candlelight we sat
With lights all aglow on the Christmas tree
And sparkling tinsel reflecting in her eyes
Wrapping presents and placing them under the tree
This Christmas Eve is special to me
For a year ago on this very night a stranger knocked at my door
All covered in snow and wet to the bone, I opened the door
It was you my love the love I have searched for
Your car broken down with no cell phone
I asked if you wanted a warm drink, your reply was priceless
A warm drink I would like my Juliet but let me introduce myself
My name is Romeo
I would Wisk you off in my chariot but my horse is in need of a shoe
May I just use your phone to call a tow truck?
One year ago on this very night I met my Romeo
(This is not based on a true story my name really isn’t Romeo)
I vibrate on a higher frequency, I try to hold myself to a higher decency, sometimes it's hard not to go into creep mode, but I try my best and stick to the G code
I ask myself what would I want my son to do in situations I face, but the trick is not to ever have my son in the situations I face, daddy was a anomaly I might have used up all his luck, so I have to be the advice in his head if ever he feels stuck, I have to be there to pull him out like a personal tow truck
Looking in the mirror & seeing your real reflection for the first time can be epic, but if you are living like a dirt bag you may feel septic, what I see when I look is a misguided King but a King nonetheless, I'll get the kingdom back in order no question because I'm blessed
When the war within is fought & won, I won't need confirmation I know I AM the chosen one, enemies will be welcomed with a open arm, my chakras are aligned you can bring me no harm, you may not be able to see it now but we are the same God, when we get together & form Voltron we'll have a unstoppable squad
Mom’s old Chrysler is the scourge of my life
driving it, this sedan makes me complain
forty meters on a ride, the wheels pop--
by that time, I miss the green light... again!
So I'm squatting like a fool on a byway
with prayers, the tow truck gets here real fast--
while counting a hundred 'go' lights blink on ;
my lacy dress spoils, my frail wits aghast!
To make matters worse, tonight's the great prom...
While above the green bulb, a poster reads,
" Is your auto worn-out? Here's an offer!
Get the new Chrysler where each ride succeeds!
Carolyn Devonshire's Contest
Green Humor Rhymes, Old Or New For Prizes
1/16/2019 ~ Revised
The pet peeves of a female tow truck driver
Please don’t hit on me
I’m here to tow your car
Not to date you
Don’t pass me your phone number folded up in cash
I won’t call you
EVER
Being groped while doing an unlock isn’t sexy
It’s assault
And I will assault you with the dolley bar on the back of my truck
Please don’t try to help me do my job
I have been trained to do this
You haven’t
If I’m not there in the time the dispatcher told you
Blame my dispatcher
I only got the call 5 minutes ago
Don’t hover over me while I do my job
My boss wouldn’t have sent me if he didn’t have faith in me
I don’t need a babysitter
Don’t give me pointers on how to do a recovery
You parked it poorly
It’s my job to un-park it
If you call us to change your tire
Let ME change your tire
If your ego is that fragile, don’t call us for assistance
It doesn’t impress me that you know my boss
Everyone knows my boss
And no, I’m not giving you a discount
When you see me working on the highway
Slow down and move over like the law states
I want to get home safe too
Andy had a lime green Cadillac
took him for a ride and didn’t bring him back
he never crashed
he lived until he was 95
here is where the story may
open your eyes
it was late December when
he passed away
then I saw the tow truck on
the very next day
It had his shinning old car in tow
the first time I seen it in the ice and snow
at the service was a picture of
him in his car
I thought that very strange
but everybody knows
times will change
at the cemetery
no body prepared me for the fright
his car on a boom truck
did not look right
Andy sitting at the wheel
man what a sight
It took six plots to cover him in
as the car was lowered down I thought I saw him grin
Andy had a lime green Cadillac
took him for a ride and didn’t bring him back
You think he’d be more grateful.
Neither rich nor poor he’s
never wanted for anything.
He's always had what he needs
but never had any gratitude
until the day his car broke down
in a poor neighborhood and he
got out of his car to wave the
tow truck down and gasped
at the poverty around him.
He’ll catch hell about this
the next time I shave.
Donal Mahoney
Reality is hard to replace
our white elephant is a disgrace
she parks herself wherever she places
usually taking up needed space
in the old days she would win a race
now she'll barely outrun a turtles pace
kids use to play on her face
on her trunk their hands would trace
upkeep we still embrace
her past is hard to erase
through the hands of time she lies in God's grace
through our hearts we loved our old faithful ace
and now the time has come to part waste
the deed to ole rusty bomber is in the brief case
soon her ashes will be placed in the family vase
when the setting sun covered her tears with lace
as the tow truck took away ... her final breath
... reality is hard to replace
3/18/17
Someone, or Something, Replaceable - Poetry Contest
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