Pickle Poems

A Ticklish Situation

Call me fickle
no doubt about it
I’m in a pickle
a firkin full of gherkin
quite a quandary
tho' still a dill
the question isn’t funny
it’s ridiculous
others may tickle us
yet I don’t see
for love nor money
why I can’t tickle me

No Blimp Equals Pickle In Pub

Golly, what a Pickle you’re In -- Bub,
How is it That you’re stuck in a Pub?
Gullible -- You look, Pimp
for why not hop, on Blimps?
and Fly in its Massive Ruba-dub.

Pickle - Mar 19

Pow! the pale powder pumps power into 
The pastor’s panicked pulse. Peeing his pants, 
He pulls his parcel and pitter-patters
To the piss-pot, paying his penile penance. 

Old Pickle

He lies on his bed in the rest home -
the old man that nurses all there
have given the nickname Old Pickle.
(Of course they've seen beneath his underwear.)

Like greenish blue cheese
bulge the veins of his legs.
By this stage of his life,
he wished they were pegs.

He once was as smooth as mozzarella,
melting every woman with his smile.
Now

Blue Cheese Moon

blue cheese moon glows swoons
fickle as an old pickle
maiden not impressed

Dill Pickle Hated Blue Cheese

Dill pickle hated him so
Because he stank badly
Dill pickle screamed just go
Blue cheese wept thus sadly
When I leave the fridg, bro
I'll stink ever much mo
Dill pickle grew older
Fermenting like a bozo
Then opening his holder
A stink scent deathblow

In a Pickle

being in a May-December relationship 
could test the boundaries of patience
like the football socks under a teenager’s bed
it does not age well

these relationships have unique challenges
the rehashed stories of ‘the good old days’
smell of figments of their imagination
as it contradicts with history lessons taught

they harp on about ‘songs with words’
ones people could dance to
with their

Pickle Balls and Paddle Bells

  ~ to the tune of 'Jingle Bells,' please ~

     
   Tushies slide, what a ride
     slipping on the ice
   All we need’s a beaming bride
    and a few bouquets of rice

   Where’s the groom, in his

in a pickle

Remember when the paddle board was used for a different type of paddling

mickle pickle schmickle

Mickle pickle schmickle ding dong due
Eyes on the prize for both me and you
Dragon flies by on a plane summer blue
Mickle pickle schmickle ding dong due

Pickle

Written for and about my eldest daughter, Freya Lily (Pickle).


Ive loved you,
from the very first second I saw you,
you are my beautiful first born.
So the times when I see you upset 
frustrates me and I’m torn.
Because you truly are  lovely,
And trust me when I say 
that I look at you every day
Filled with so

Pickle On the Road

When walking along on the road,
An object appeared, so I slowed.
It was probably tossed
From a car that had crossed;
The surprise on my face must have showed.

‘Twas a pickle, a deli-type spear,
Maybe packed with a sandwich? Unclear.
Crisp and green, its appeal
Would add much to a meal 
Of a passing black bear or a deer.

Still, the person

Panda In a Pickle

Help me Mum I'm stuck up this tree,

I thought it was Bamboo I just couldn't see,

It's getting quite windy, so I gripping much tighter,

And I don't want to worry you but my grips getting slighter,

Come and get me Mum and I'll promise I will be a good little Panda,

Well I will be after I've eaten

Ginger and Pickle Store

Ginger and Pickle store; what is that? She asked.
I had no idea; I was pouring last drop from a flask.
It is where I keep my lemonade, because it feels cool.
Besides it makes the others crazy, in this weirded-up school.

I am serious, she said. Mrs. Hen and Goose are over there.
I ran with her then; we

Fickle Pickle

A fickle pickle occurs when a barytic agent is introduced. Moving onward to eat one of the tainted fruits, the result is shameless drunken bacchanal behavior.  Vomiting may produce sintered clumps. Extralinguistic speech may occur with reversionary doubting crosshatched with psychical deformities of the tongue. Curdling spital may also be present. Unspecific hallucinations, plainspoken

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