Long Pun Poems

Unique: I need someone to hold me and tell
me it's alright.
I need someone to hold my hands and feel
my pain.
I need someone to kiss away my pain.
I need someone to look into my eyes and...

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Limericks
by Michael R. Burch



Clyde Lied!
by Michael R. Burch

There once was a mockingbird, Clyde,
who bragged of his prowess, but lied.
To his new wife he sighed,
"When again, gentle bride?"
"Nevermore!" bright-eyed Raven replied.



The Platypus
by Michael R. Burch

The platypus,...

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Still wrestling with impasse to contentment

Dispense sing with fidelity blithely agog
just me and mine dark shadow 
slinking along outer limits of 
the edge of night doth blog
passivity, the path 
of least resistance ohm my dog,
shocking...

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I wanted to write
 The best slavery poem   ever written—
Perhaps win a Pulitzer or Faulkner. 

I had every intention of conforming 
To the standards 
Of modern verse and composition, 
Lyrics fluidly written, 
Perfect...

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Wrestling with impasse to contentment

Dispense sing with fidelity blithely agog
just me and mine dark shadow 
slinking along the edge of night doth blog
passivity, the path of least resistance ohm my dog,
shocking voltage surges an emphatic...

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Geese, Goslings and the Bridge

Sometimes, when you least expect it, Mother Nature makes a u-turn and draws you into the ridiculous.  Such was the time recently as I was returning from a friend’s home...

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He is looking at her a bit sanctimoniously
He is about to mansplain again

"Am I spooking you?" he asks grinning
"I'm not trying to propose, Cutie.
God no. Could you imagine?
I just think it's possible, you know?
I'm just...

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Long 'ere legends encountered finesse amidst flairs of passionate cravings,
thereupon, be a period wherein an episode occasioned an opportunity that will be reserved forever.
An outbreak of dismembering words are been exchanged between groups of rapscallions.
The...

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‘ In general, quantum mechanics does not predict a single definite result for an observation. Instead, it predicts a number of  different possible outcomes and tells us how likely each of these is. ‘

...

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Unquotable quotes: Poets, Poetasters and Platos – XXXVI

     For James McAuley – in remembrance of a memorable week in Cardiff 1965 

The greatest poet ever is NOT Homer, Lao Tse, Ovid,...

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[R-F] = Roundling facsimile
[H-Z] = Human: Zenaide
[G-G] = Gaia-Google - Earth's world-wide internet mind


Dr. Zenaide Arnau, team leader of L 4 investigation
U.N. assignment to Space Station 1
supported by logicians, technicians, physicists and geneticists
unsure why assignment...

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Please Michelle Obama...
can you save American democracy?

I highly hugely grant 
Barack Hussein belated kudos
what with his wizardesses 
in tow wrought wonders 
to one nation analogous 
while an under dog
sweeping in like... 
It's a Bird... It's...

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In April of this year I began preparing a new organic gardening patch,
planning to have it ready for next year's expansion from a too-small garden
in front of my recently acquired Connecticut Cape Cod home.

I have...

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The moral mortgage of mice and men 

Yours truly quite astute,
especially regarding cute
little field mice, also known 
as meadow voles,
which imprecation one doth emote,
when aforementioned animal burrows inside
leaving pellet size poop in their wake
suddenly presenting...

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"Bits and Pieces III"      Posted 1 Aug 2021
Pun Ishment
	bread is like the sun      it rises in the yeast and it sets in the waist

English Class
	epitome...

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SAD Seasonally Affective Disorder

Some are prone to depression in winter when days get shorter when
less light enters the brain through the eyes and thoughts become darker

I am also affected and when news gets explosive when...

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DEMONS DO EXIST . . . 

You can't spend all your time stuffing them in your bottom drawer
In time they will all work their way out and when they do, it's war

Thousands of years of...

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Ongepatshket torqued skewed reflection

drawn courtesy lots of byte size chalk.

When e'er I summon fat chance
to empower me self with courage 
and steal a passing glance
in the mirror then instantaneously 
hairline fractures appear
than 'afore long 
snap,...

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Everything that’s happening this year
was all planned out.
That’s what Agenda 21 (declared as false online)
 is all about.
Documents related to the plan
are out there in the world for anyone to see.
When I first heard about...

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A Coffee Merchant was the first man to find,
The corpse as he started off on his daily grind!
What he saw filtered through, so he had grounds
To send for the Police, to investigate what he'd found!

He’d...

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An anticlimactic sexual event...

with Barb Black née Beebee
to help set the ghost
of little Willy Brandt free
(a non German, but germane fellow  
courtesy Craigslist classified
personals of mine invitee
she replied, I took liberty
to Google her first...

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In our Sharing Circles
we have a ground rule
to share a one speaker at a time floor
and unitarian silent listening support

And rules to not share uninvited commentary
suggestions
verbal agreements or disagreements
during, and after,
this formalized Circle.

Speakers are invited...

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Heterosexual married sexagenarian male...

Aims to trigger cerebral orgasm;

Other terms for said phenomena are 
"brain tingles" and "head orgasm." 
This sensation is described as a pleasant, 
even euphoric, tingling warmth and/or feeling 
of relaxation that comes...

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Support Your Local Po' Whet (Hick) Bummer, i.e. me

Freedom from onset of pervasive gloom 
(attendant with profusely perspiring palms, 
hut tree men duh us aggravation), would be 
a dog send to this melon collie bow...

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I am ill eke quipped to dusk hoover dawn ting task of badinage

Indentured gumption forsaken 
courtesy each pulled wisdom-tooth
this hug gust aspiring writer..., albeit youth
fool looking imp posse Hubble wordsmith,
(i.e. the babbling dad) coon sitters...

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