If only grammar were simplified
we then could speak uncriticized.
Or, if grammar were abandoned
we’d all be speaking standard.
Think how easy it would be
to speak flawed yet naturally,
and not worry that what we say
is the right or proper way.
The purist will of course object
and castigate me as a derelict,
arguing that ungrammatical English
is speech reduced to gibberish.
But I remind him of this fact:
language is a spontaneous act,
and much of what passes today
as proper English was yesterday
condemned as bad and therefore
unsuitable and socially improper.
How, then, is it today acceptable
when once it was objectionable?
I’ll tell you why and clearly: Because
language does not progress by laws
fixed and rigid: rather time and usage
are what mold and move language.
And so, to every stuffed shirt scholar
I say, don’t get hot under the collar,
what you angrily dismiss today as rubbish
will tomorrow be proper English.
Was in Burger King when I spied her
The other staff, mingers beside her
I ordered, hot under the collar
She asked me, go large for a dollar?
Next day, I went there quite late
I asked if she’d come on a date
You buying? I heard her boss holler
She guessed I’d go large for a dollar
We had a good date and she said
Why don’t you take me to bed
She frowned at my ‘eager young scholar’
‘So, do you go large for a dollar?’
Artificial Intelligence
By: Tom
2/14/2021
Things are created each day
that will be man’s downfall.
example:
A.I. has given me a robotic dog,
he isn’t bothered by cold,
has no problems with fleas,
but is plagued with a skin rash called rust,
so he stays inside when raining or has to be oiled daily.
oh, and by the way,
During summer months he does get a little hot under the collar
when he don’t get bottled water.
Don't tell me to wear a mask, it's so frightful.
I find God's fresh air more than delightful!
So be on your way, and happy vaccine day!
Natural living, great immunity and organic diet are my way.
Now this makes some people hot under the collar.
But since I can't leave my house, why bother?
August 27, 2020
3am PST
I LOOKED AT HER
IN THEM TIGHT FITTEN' JEANS
LIKE WHAT I SAW
SHE WANTED TO BE SEEN
SUMBODY KNEADIN LOVE
WOULD CURSE OR SNEAR
TURN ROUND TO WATCH HER
AND COMPLIMENT FROM THE REAR
THEY MY SONG IS DIVISIVE
SUM SAY IT'S DEFINED
IT CROSSES BOUNEDRIES
YET STAY'S WITHIN THE LINES
HOW CAN I WONDER
TO WORDS THEN
SHOULD SPEAK
HOT UNDER THE COLLAR
WORDS CAUSES HEAT
JINGLE DEZ BABY
WALK, DO YO THANG
BABY SWITCH LIKE YOU MEAN-IT
JUST DO THE THANG
POSE FOR THE CAMERA
STOP AND WHISPER
DINNER AND SUM LOVING
SUM THANG TO TALK BOUT
TOMMORROW
She's thwarted his advances for bluer skies
cat chasing her tail
to poking at nothing there
why is this such a fail
retrieving her blank stare
he tries again, his paws
grasping thin air
his teeth into her jaw
for answers to her impair
he scowls, then paces to scare
purring none the less
as his eyes scream and glare
at her mandates digress
come on what's up with you
he would say if he were a man
did you forget the screws
that drill holes into your playpen
hot under the collar he yells
get yourself ready, he stews
under hell bells
I'm taking you without further ado
she looks back at him and laughs
as a she sees a molly walk by
laying the wood into her chaff
sorry females are my bluer skies
connie pachecho
1/5/17
it was hot
makes you feel spent just breathin'
but she was comfortable as judas in hades
just like ice cool in the shade
you shout and dance about with all this jealousy
you are electric hot under the collar
but the winds are blowing in her favor
but the rivers are sweet on her lips
it was hot as death warmed over
not an ounce of inked shade to be had
and you got issues hounding your thoughts
beginning to feel like its a church to the
apostle's of rage
darken your horizons with her
like the universe is her little game
the wind walks its ignorant gesture across you
and that just fans the flames
after all she just acknowledged her divinity
its hot enough to cook my head
but you are wrapped tighter than a prisoner
all used up and jealous
key to surviving this day lay in her eyes
in them you see your forgiven soul
in them you see your salvation's way
if you can forgive yourself first
if you can grow that fast
We’re writing hieroglyphics for the next civilization to decipher
Armageddon is brewed in the lab for children like us born in petri-dishes
Raised like crops plugged amid weeds
We downgrade to something less than human
The weather forecast is hot under the collar
Amid self elected rule
A runaway economy fallen off the tracks
We salvage what we can from the wreckage
And build our shacks anew
Missiles resemble fireworks at major festivities
Love is a script written for puppet theatre
Hate is a t-shirt mass printed,
And worn to peace rallies and even weddings
Boy soldiers give their lives needlessly to the killing fields
I hugged my lover’s dead bones today
In her memory like a bullet to the temple
Alive, I buried her in a shallow grave, dug with my rifle as I returned fire
I mark my final resting place next to hers
To replenish the soil with a kind of love
Wearing your ego in that ride as you go
A new fragrance to hide an old flaw
A cool flow that’s hot under the collar
In that overdue ostentation soon to follow
Wearing labels you are labelled like a billboard
And branding a fake patriotism and brotherhood
You are new age sold out to an old syllabus
If I were you I would jump off that bus
Undermining life like you struck gold
The wrong directions this generation has been sold
As if it pays to run life over like road kill
Though even dead, some things are useful
It’s the froth of lack of self-restraint
The rotten brew of utter contempt
I won’t cover my nose next time you walk by
It’s the smell of breast milk, you've just been born free
Intoxicated by the vast open sea
Her music and fragrance
Let me entice you with my words sticky
Don’t get hot under the collar
For it is nothing but words
Simple words yet powerful
That is, if you allow yourself to be carried away
Whatever you are thinking right now
Is not what I am writing
If you could see me grin
You will know this is but a game
Where is it taking you?
Your thoughts are really your own
But I have to wonder
Some will think this insane
And some will feel it!!
No fault of mine
It may seem wicked but then
I guess this is a playfully wicked write
LOL
This is what happens I guess
When I rendezvous with the sun
It is part of who I am
To inspire and motivate
But can also reduce you to tears
For this is the power of words
So hold on to the reigns
As I poke your horse’s behind
Your, beloved holding on
Her arms tightly around you
Clinging on for dear life
Your, horse raging forward
Into the dusk leaving behind
A trail of smothering dust
Ronnie was born on October the thirteen.
Ozzfest was here on his first birthday.
Next year he will be twelve years old.
Nearly a teenager he will be.
Inch by inch he is growing up.
Every year he reminds me more and more of lil' coy.
Careless and daring he is.
Out going and full of life.
Young and healthy he will be for a long time.
Living life to the fullest.
Extra special in his own way.
Extra kind when he wants to be.
Wild and wacky on demand.
Hot under the collar at times.
Everybody knows him well.
Everybody likes him when he's not being a brat.
Love is not hard for him to show.
Everybody wants to slap him sometimes.
Ronnie is ronnie is ronnie.
Here are some fun things that happened
On that classic Candid Camera show
A man walked backwards on a sidewalk
People copied him, wouldn't you know?
A man wearing only tighty whiteys
Asked the hotel clerk for a room
A street cleaner starts cleaning the gutters
With a broom handle but missing the broom
A man was pumping gas at a gas station
It ends up costing eight hundred dollars
Obviously, the dial was tampered with
Strangely, he got hot under the collar
A lady is surprised by a job interview
Conducted by a six year old boy
A mailbox that says, “Have a good day!”
People didn't catch on to this ploy
This couldn't happen in today's modern world
Where everyone's on top of their game
Back then, we could all laugh at ourselves
Too bad the time's had to change!
© Jack Ellison 2012
I'm lost inside your world...
Hang on every word...
A love I can't afford...
I breaks my heart...
Sapping my hopes..
Draining my dreams...
I live my life in a constant
daze...
Confused,bewitched and
bewildered...
Hot under the collar...
My love is far too young...
It's painfully naive..
For a man matured in years..
I worry...
About the money...
Living faraway from friends...
about the years I have not got...
And yes I love too much..
Your always on my mind...
Not to sure if that's healthy...
You make me feel ten feet tall...
And then I fall..
Or hit the wall...
I am a fool...
For believing dreams come true..
They only make you blue...