Self Hate Poems

I thought for so long you were my good friend,
trusted you with a faithful mind without any doubt,
but in the difficult times I didn’t find...

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"The dealer cheated!"
You cry to deaf ears
Or at least, ears that need some aid
"The game makers should've by now retreated,
You will keep in mind my...

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Farther and farther you go
I hope you dig yourself a grave
Buried and no way out
Without a coffin so I can watch you choke
On your sins...

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If love is...
feeling unloved, 
anxious and starved,
give my  regards
Does the torment of love's hate
eliminate pain?
If love is trembling lips
and sultry eyes, upon them
everlasting cries,
Charcoal...

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a small position given in a place of chaos
perfect place to flourish and gain
hiding behind unhealed trauma and pain 
playing a role as a trusted...

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There’s this voice that echoes inside of me,in the pit of my soul
He has long sharp nails, with which he tears down the walls of...

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What if I'm wrong?
One of these broken messes
Always a ghost in the corner 
The fractures never healed 
What if these jagged edges are just hiding...

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Cold is the tittering of befitted feet
Cold is the meagre meanders of falling fractals 
Cold is the twinge of bitter blues upon reeling retreats
Cold is...

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Spirals

Smiling so polite
to regurgitated lines that we recite
A serene sea 
A tranquil facsimile
That's what you see
That's what I show
all so you don't know

In the mirror...

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Within the shadows of darkened lanes and alleys, 

There i dwell hidden from sight ,sounds and smell, 

Humankind knows me not walk away as if...

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Her soul cracked, cheeks burned, eyes swollen with sorrow.  
She saw her cheerful past walking by the corridor, head held high.  
She once bloomed like...

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To be immune from aspersions mean and vile
May assuage our hurt feelings for awhile
But to really uphold the Golden Rule
We must also withhold words harsh...

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the soul
that thinks it has a right to my body.
Ungrateful—
it does nothing but complain.

And really, what right does it have?
It has it too good—so good
that,...

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In Considerations
—————————

Selfish life is so now too, completing me but mostly you. All the hell you put me through, clever lists of “wish I knew”....

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I never learned anything from my younger self,
I knew I needed therapy meds and a lot of help
Thoughts from my past are creeping up on...

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