The Past

I never learned anything from my younger self, I knew I needed therapy meds and a lot of help Thoughts from my past are creeping up on me fast As a child of many many children in the family I was born third so no one gave a damn about me! 17 years old I saw my dad cheat on my mom He gave her the ultimatum to choose him or thee I was kicked out to my sister's so hard to move past this I'm now in my forty somethings. Relationships I have found to be the hardest to have. What's wrong with me? Why does everyone hate me? What did I do wrong? Why am I still here on earth to this day? Thoughts from my past are creeping up on me fast