Seen as a collection of spare parts
swimming in close formation
neither fish nor fowl
from a southern hemisphere nation
sewn together as if torn asunder
the amphibian antipodean
from way Down Under
is the odd-looking bottom-feeding
no muss nor fuss
otter-footed beaver-tailed
egg-laying duck-billed platypus
the males of which are venomous
an excellent swimmer
whenever it dives
it closes its ears nose and eyes
altho' a riparian carnivore
electroreception is how it survives
It's enough to make one chunder
there used to be a time Down Under
when fair dinkum the label on the tucker tin
only stated the true blue maker's name
and the Vegemite we'd eat for brekkie contained therein
while not a porky implied mate there's something to hide
with a shonky no responsibility disclaimer
I’m spewin’ cranky as today's focus is on what's not inside
no GMO cholesterol additives gluten calories caffeine nuts
no added colouring sugar preservatives
no artificial sweeteners monounsaturated
no polyunsaturated &/or trans fats
and bloody oath cobber that's not all as I recall
no worries tho' there's also low sodium
not whingeing but one wonders if it's a dodgy admission
there's no bonzer thingo within such as ace nutrition
meanwhile I'll fill my billycan from yon billabong
surrounded by a few emu and a roo or two
as up a gum tree the kookaburra laughingly looks on
there's nothing more I can do so may as well
bung another shrimp on the barbie blow the froth off a few
have one last blast on me didgeridoo Blue and shoot through
When a pastor asked a lady
if she was planning a trip
down under she hesitated:
Yes, I am, she said nervously.
It’s my first trip to Australia
if that’s what you mean
at least that’s what I hope.
Yes, that’s exactly what I meant
he reassured.
By-the-way, I’m a pastor.
I thought you looked familiar
she said eagerly.
And though I’m not
a congregant of your church, sir,
I have read a few of your sermons –
and I find them quite radical
given my little knowledge
of biblical Christianity.
“Really?” said the pastor
as the plane began its descent.
Perhaps we’ll meet again
somewhere in down under,
who knows he said.
Yes, who knows, she said.
But don't look too hard for me;
by saying down under
I didn’t mean Australia.
in my darkest mind,
cosmic scenes bind.
vivid dreams come true
in rhymes, stained blue.
in my place of wonder,
i’m dragged down under.
i mask life’s swift scurry
as I ask, why the hurry?
solemn ties of deceitful lies
compromise my needful cries.
blossom eyes of peaceful skies
disguise my sweet demise.
and in my brightest night,
stars align in all their light.
vivid dreams come true
in rhymes, stained blue
Swathed in shadows deep
she looked up
from her far below
of down under
seemingly afloat
hesitating at the bottom
of the long staircase.
Only a faint outline
of her oval face perceptible,
framing dark eyes
opened wide hugely round
pupils expanded
like an exaggeration
a caricature drawn...
The doorway to her soul
open wide
revealing a pathos
deeper than hell.
The koala's spiritual beliefs
Are difficult to assess.
He attends no mosque or synagogue
And never does confess.
He's not a cannibal and so
Communion is appalling,
And as for gospel singing,
It's just so much caterwauling.
I suppose he's an agnostic,
Yet he often stops and ponders
The reason for this universe
And all its many wonders.
And so we must be satisfied
With this insight that's been slipped us,
While he goes back to being cute
And munching eucalyptus.
can you please had me a cold one, mate?
we haven’t even had brekkie yet!
you are making my choices your bizzo?
hold your daks on.
I was joking, okay?
Kangaroos bounce lower
for tis the season
some roo laze on their backs
smoke electric cigarettes
Green moments
are discovered in Antarctica
Give your thanks America
give us your huddled elves
your heaving tinsel mountains
sprinkle all our glary nights
Wild-eyed are the rug-rats
they expect a baby-born
one bearing gifts from Toyland
alas alack the three wise guys
took a wrong left in the sand
and found themselves Outback
they waltz now around the billabongs
seeking the vapor trails of large marsupials
and they, the Aussie big boppers
the hoppers, are just chilling
unwilling to face more festive day's
nor shovel up or scoop
yet more reindeer poop
Oh, so bluest the sky doth shine
A hint of the new season’s ploy,
Sweet November a springtime shrine
Grains of golden sands of pure joy.
Towards December’s hottest sun
Where the dust is stirred to a tune,
And winter waifs become undone
When gone the drowsy days of June.
Wild Lilac flowers bend their heads
Touch rainbows of unwasted weeds,
Swell the colours of feathered beds
As rainfall shrinks forsaking reeds.
End of year is the beginning
As nature moves in lucid tones,
Dawn’s chorus keeps the world spinning
While Cockatoos perch on their thrones.
Entered November, December Poetry Contest
Sponsor Karen Krutsinger.
poem wrote 15/11/2022
Paris Down Under
I heard the thunder
all the kangaroos hid
children screamed in fear
the witch, her brew asunder
I calmed the innocent
peace is within my sphere
I danced with a Wolfe
Birds took a glance at philosophy
A druid mumbles
give peace a chance
I swallowed a lemon
said are crazy Sheilas in sanity?
Life full of questions
answers fly in the wind
just remember these wise words
ignore the ugly echo's
of skeletons in the wind
Ukrainian soldiers will fight
The Russians by day and by night
They don't need sleep
Because they keep
Chewing Australian Vegemite
autumn time in may
blue mountains and coral reefs
southern hemisphere
11 / 19 / 2021.
Poetrysoup syllable counter.
DON’t CHUNDER DOWN-UNDER!
In the land of the Southern Ocean
Legal forces have been set in motion
Binding those who once wandered free
With restriction: imperious decree
When did wild and free spirit take flight
What became of ‘No worries! She’ll be right!
Once a destiny set for enchainment
Was transformed to a land of attainment
With demeanour of free careless rapture
Like a will-o-the wisp hard to capture
Then fear came like a thief in the night
Where now: ‘No worries! She’ll be right!’
Let that old psyche bring remission
And defy decrees of politicians
And of those who would cower in fearing
Of a threat enabling domineering
Bring a future that still can be bright
With: ‘No worries! And with: ‘She’ll be right!’
If you chase death, it might not be your life that is cut short.
Don't put your keys in the same pocket as your cell phone.
One source for news heralds only one outcome.
Communities make cents, governments seldom see sense.
If you want a job done, join the ques.
We sometimes underestimate the size of the shadow we cast.
A genuine smile can warm up a room.
Fraudsters like companies that are understaffed.
Apron strings tied with a bow show running away is not the only way out.
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