Bachelor Poems | Examples

Premium Member Bachelor Crow Suggests Another Meet Up

Three shiny-loving crows found a perch, and plunked their talons down
Two had landed on a rusty antique pick-up truck – Tom and Town.
Their cousin Lee had found a place to sit on a telephone pole.
Bragging, laughing and sharing stories was their goal.

Their stories were bawdy, and funny, fowl-like and fine.
By the time the sun began lowering, they had told forty-nine.
Cawing, squawking, crackling creaky beak laughs floated in the air.
Let’s meet here Wednesday said Lee, if you two married ones dare.

Premium Member Sam the Eligible Bachelor Cat

Sam was the fluffiest Tom on the Parisian block
The tittering of females was found around the clock
They came into Starbucks at a quarter until eight
Giggling and gaggling, which he did not appreciate

Give it a rest, Sam thought, as he tried to read his book.
They were older ladies, giving him a “come hither look”.
He was tired of being married, he had done it six times before.
He would always amble home to Mama at a quarter to four.

Premium Member James Fuchsia Bachelor Pad

James did not invite a lot of guests
they had to know him better than the rest
his mother had decorated his apartment nest
in hot pinks and fuchsia, a friendship test

he had protested when he had first seen his lair
I am the expert, his mother said, to be quite fair
she also wanted to give overeager girlfriends a scare
staying over meant that they probably did really care


Premium Member Old Bachelor Wants His Privacy

How merry could the old bachelor be?
We decided to set him up, times three.
He was polite.
Not contrite.
He then demanded life privacy.

An Old Bachelor

A fast depreciating currency, 
Pity arousing like an emergency 
His low earning not an excuse 
For a now irritating celibacy 
 And choice of a lifelong recluse, 
Whose quitting ought to have been with immediacy! 

In closely knit societies the first outlaw, 
Easily emerging the night’s gossip served raw; 
In every ranking the lowly esteemed 
To take up the rear among the fondly dreamed,
Be he a scholar or a voice, 
A guidance counselor or one whom children rejoice: 
What the hell has been stopping him from the Holy Sacrament, 
If he has in a wife’ foreseen an Ornament.

Always outdoor activities shunning 
But in the nocturnal hours shining, 
If not among his likes the Unhappily Married, 
Who when not bemoaning their marriage, already buried 
Are enjoying his clever bachelorhood 
And mistake avoiding manhood!

Premium Member Bachelor

still life
no wife


Bachelors Xray Report

The eligible for a female partner
Between the highly placed and a gardener;
Thirty years a massively supported age,
As one still doesn’t seem a sage,
Who wants to a union solemnize
And the honorable fun and sex officially recognize.

Maximally forty five years for any male to stop being bloody single,
His voice, strength or money to start arranging a marriage jingle.

Often of few worries, a lot of liberties exercising
And to a lifestyle of softer morals compromising;
No fathered babies to be humoring with toys,
A decided diversion of attention to other joys…
No infant to on its behalf bulging envelopes release,
No reckless nor fastidious wife to scold with ease.

A time and again experimentation with women
Of a life largely swayed by bad omen:
What he ‘d been snatching from ***********,
With the promiscuous posing in careless photography
The same practices this married counterparts had dropped behind
In pursuit of the mature lifestyle of the Non blind.

Handsome Bachelor of Bygone Ages

Oh, you never married and wanted to settle down,
today you regret it and cry alone;
beautiful girls, you held in your manly arms,
some were fooled, many looked for love, not fun!
Oh, are you proud of the crazy things you've done?
Hearts don't break easily unless one lies!

Handsome bachelor of bygone ages,
aren't you sorry for using those poor girls,
promising them Haven, and never marrying them?
How sure were you not to have found a gem?

Oh, you took pretty girls to your castle,
there you were king and they obeyed your rules;
little they knew you deceived them with promises;
oftentimes, they didn't smile but tremble!

Handsome bachelor of bygone ages,
you were blessed with charming smiles,
making everyone fall for you and it felt cool
without realizing you didn't feel complete!
Handsome bachelor of bygone days,
you didn't live a godly life, but a lustful
one using them and hurting them
as you pleased feeding the flame of your whim
that condemned nothing, everything was obsolete!

Handsome Bachelor of Bygone Ages

Oh, you never married and wanted to settle down,
today you regret it and cry alone;
beautiful girls, you held in your manly arms,
some were fooled, many looked for love, not fun!
Oh, are you proud of the crazy things you've done?
Hearts don't break easily unless one lies!

Handsome bachelor of bygone ages,
aren't you sorry for using those poor girls,
promising them Haven, and never marrying them?
How sure were you not to have found a gem?

Oh, you took pretty girls to your castle,
there you were king and they obeyed your rules;
little they knew you deceived them with promises;
oftentimes, they didn't smile but tremble!

Handsome bachelor of bygone ages,
you were blessed with charming smiles,
making everyone fall for you and it felt cool
without realizing you didn't feel complete!
Handsome bachelor of bygone days,
you didn't live a godly life, but a lustful
one using them and hurting them
as you pleased feeding the flame of your whim
that condemned nothing, everything was obsolete!

On Wanting To Become a Bachelor

Less any objection with the missus,
versus never experiencing living alone
well...yes during that rough patch,
(sans during early adolescence),
I existed in a bone

huff fied impenetrable cocoon,
and just maybe before
yours truly dies, a clone
can be created from
stem cells of this doggone

melon collie, whimpering
beastie boy finally revelling,
where destiny does enthrone
me rendering unfettered
with round the cluck nymph fone

mani yolk hen pecking, nagging,
and leaching... from blood sucking
vampire spouse foregone
as a "bad" dream worse
than getting Rhode

Island sized gallstone
removed subsequently
saving said as gemstone
whiling away hours, days, weeks...
chiseling away at my gravestone,

no matter yours truly will get cremated
ashes scattered, liberated, and dispersed
finally exempt from grindstone,
where thee spirit
of Math Hew Homophone

Scott Harris appeased
as powdery gray flecks
similar to limestone,
that swirl reintegrating with Earth,

this quirky I poetically intone,
and soundlessly utter from jawbone,
perhaps communicating more
clearly by knucklebone.

Premium Member Gourmet Bachelor Man

Noodles kept fluffy and warm
   Peas from the can shorn
Water drained from tuna's can
     Now, bachelor man
       Add all the mayo
         You can stand
              Feast!

Bachelor Unity

Bachelor 
unity       

Which words can you come up without
duplicating that use the most different 
letters? The above two words use thirteen
different letters. They also use all five
vowels. See if you can top that. Also,

I did not realize how many different 
definitions to do had. Jim Horn

To do: 

perform, execute

slang: attack

slang: have sex with

work, suffice

be reasonable or acceptable

in questions

in negations

for emphasis

referring to an earlier verb (pro-verb)

cook

visit

be exhausted, finished, ready

take care of, be well

be in jail

Premium Member The Eligible Bachelor

My son Scottie, the eligible bachelor
Has been down the road, still a lonesome traveller
His time will come
Sure as the sun
Keeps rolling around, he's a charming feller!

Premium Member The Eligible Bachelor

My son Scottie, the eligible bachelor
Has been down the road, still a lonesome traveller
His time will come
Sure as the sun
Keeps rolling around, he's a charming feller!

Bachelor Day

Bachelor Day 
It was father’s day he got up early and 
drink coffee near the phone just in case
his daughter rang.

Then it was afternoon and he must have
fallen asleep and he fretted if the phone
had rung and he hadn’t heard it. 

He went into the kitchen but left the living
room door open, he had a ham sandwich 
which he ate by the phone.

It was now evening and she was not ringing
how could she a product of his wishes, 
childless man, she was a figment of your dreams.

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