Long Wrong number Poems

Since you asked me directly,

I can tell you about it, only indirectly.
The weeks and months and years
now that it happened,
and still happens from time to time 
when I am really paying attention and ready
to play.

It's...

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(This may be a lot of peoples personal testimony)
In my clouded, muddled, mind I got a lot of things going on and in my mind I hear the phone is ringing but I won't answer...

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A mother holding her child in her hands, saying “How gorgeous she is!”. 
A mother watching her 3 year old son saying his first word, and thus say “How smart he is!” 
But neither do...

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Winter nights, the darkness comes quick
Key in door, to an empty house
Jacket falls fast right on the floor
I stare at the stand, at the telephone for sure

There she sits, alone, unmoving
No blinking light
No message at...

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Wrong bread for Fred

here I am sick in bed
got the chills and aches in my head
called the pharmacy and spoke with Ned
was told of a remedy  of  oatmeal bread

thought that was new so...

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She looks like a Mede,
talks like a Persian
Got Democrat soft bray skin,
but underneath is
hard tusk tongue Republican

Girl Pharaoh-day
loves to zombie talk Friday,
while sleepwalk listening on Monday

Talking pretty contentious,
looking glossy pretentious

Her Primary job 
is to give...

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In the cold of the morn with a crisp cloudy day…
A flat tire assailed a young girl, as she went on her way.
Young and full of life but definitely overwhelmed…
She was late for work and...

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I didn't want him to leave, I begged him to stay,
It had been snowing all night, it was a winter storm;
      The wind was howling and everything was white,
 ...

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Every now and then out of nowhere you come across
you discover…you find…a story that makes you believe again…
that there is hope for humankind:

A woman…addicted to drugs with a husband who beat her
who knew she was...

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At one-thirty in the morning, while I was lying in bed reading my book. 
My mind wondered with thoughts of my husband. I couldn't stay focused on the story. I remembered I had my husband’s...

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SHE IS A SINGER
THAT YOU LACK
 THE INTELLGENCE OF KNOWING!
WHO IS THIS, HE SAID: SPEAKING
 OF THE PERSON
WHO HAS BEEN CALLING
 EACH DAY. tHAN THE VOICE SAID
"I WILL TELL YOU WHAT
 YOU NEED TO KNOW",...

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That’s how she saw me

A lying jerk
Filled with mal-intent
And inebriated twist of the devil’s tongue

She removed my smile
My patience
My need for her

She was a professor
with a Masters Degree in Investigative Drama

Drinking shots of animosity and...

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In my senior year of high school, my mother signed me up to go
to a computer school in Texas where I was to go after the summer.
But the winding roads of life don't always take...

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She called my number by mistake,
Still her voice I just couldn't shake,
Every word I could still hear,
Just as if she was whispering in my ear,
Not knowing the number to that phone line,
I simply dialed *69,
Not...

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“How was your day?” I ask,
“Fine,” You walk away.
“How are you feeling?” I question,
“Okay,” You sigh and go upstairs.
“Do you want a hug?” I smile,
“No, I’m late!” You rush out the door.
“What time will you...

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At the Doorly Zoo a well-trained guerrilla waves
It’s 3:00 am
Gorilla flung his manure like a combat soldier in guerrilla warfare
No one but the ground keepers are there, MAN DOES IT SMELL

The phone rings at 3:00...

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She picks up her books
That fell on the floor
But her hands are so full
They fell again once more

She takes a deep breathe
And picks them up again
She’s a new student
Boy what away to begin

She drops it...

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I am sitting in the sun now, letting the rays love me.
And heal me.
It’s a beautiful spring day, and I have called
Everyone I know, and a wrong number
To tell them to get outside.

I have a...

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Winter nights, the darkness comes quick
Key in door, to an empty house
Jacket falls fast right on the floor
I stare at the stand, at the telephone for sure

There she sits, alone, unmoving
No blinking light
No message at...

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I hope the whole world excuses me while I'm being young and reckless
Going to bed with beautiful girls and not staying for breakfast
Giving them the wrong number so they can't send a message
I hope the...

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PEOPLE HAVE BEEN CALLING ME AN EXPERT LIAR AND IF THEY ARE RIGHT, THIS IS PROBABLY 
THE GREATEST LIE I’VE EVER TOLD

             ...

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I just got a message on my machine
“This is Jesus if you know what I mean?”
“I’ve been meaning to talk to you.  You see I got a whole list of 
people and your number...

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A Father Calls Home

By Elton Camp

A little girl answered the phone’s loud ring
From it, a man’s voice proceeded to spring

“Hello there, Honey, this is your Daddy here.
Is Mommy perhaps to the phone very near?”

“No, she’s...

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In an attempt to increase sales, a gas station in rural Mississippi
posted this sign for all of its potential customers to read.
Free Sex With Fill Up is what the sign read.
So after filling up his...

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There I was about to telephone
a friend who used to live next door
he moved away up the country
thought I better before time moves on more

But when I rang the number
I said who was speaking
the person...

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