Long Dentists Poems

This is a rather nostalgic piece -


Meandering around on rural roads, in search of one-horse towns, with no place in particular to go,     
Connie - that’s my wife - and I,...

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I JUST CAN’T HELP IT, YA KNOW?

Elderly Lady: Help! I’ve fallen and I can’t get up!
First Alert: Duly noted, will there be anything else?
Elderly Lady: Are you going to call an ambulance?
First Alert: Ambulance? ...

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CROCODILE     CHIT - CHAT



So there  am  I  sitting, basking,  mouth wide-open in the swamp,   
An Egyptian plover just a-cleaning my teeth  -  ...

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Incredible Product Warnings

By Elton Camp

Far from folly this hair dry warning is keeping
In telling snoozers, “Do not use while sleeping”

Thinking of putting a curl in your colon or tongue? 
“For external use only,” on curling...

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Segun my child! My son!
Soon, the cock will crow at dawn
And the east will showcase the sun
Soon, you will leave my home, 
To found your own
With words of wisdom, you won’t be alone.
Like a mini-skirt,...

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Americans, Algerians, Australian aborigines,
Corrupt leaders of the world involved in illegal activities.
Bloodthirsty bullies brazenly bombing bystanders,
Militaries full of corrupt army commanders.
Charities for children, carers in communities,
Third world countries deprived of equal opportunities.
Doctors, dentists, drugs, disability...

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My depression doesnt really stay as a single thing. 
It doesnt have a name.
It doesnt really stay as anything.
Its a reflection of the skies, the rain ,the grains of sugar left over on my lips...

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E Pluribus Unum ~  Out Of Many, One

[Author's note: E Pluribus Unum is a traditional motto of the United 
States, but the scope of this poem is intended to be of a more global...

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The vampire saw the campfire and was hovering around 
For all the little children were just sitting on the ground 
He doesn't mind the fire, it’s not ultra violet light
So he listens to his dinner...

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I have the dentist blues
I have them bad
Have to go to the dentist
For my twice yearly torture session

In order to save my remaining teeth
I must endure the never ending pain

I have the dentist blues
I have...

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(William Hammer, Thomas Alva Edison's assistant,
has reached the end of his tolerance.  His boss is
planning to electrocute an elephant for a publicity
stunt.)

If he goes through with this, the dam has burst.
I'm done with him....

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You can line up at the bank
Or you can line up at the mall
If you in a real big rush, you can line up in your autocar
Coffee lines and fast food lines
Even I, have some...

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periodontal disease the bane
of Homo Sapiens, 
   and many a canine species 
   such as Great Dane

or an alien pet smart tumblr trying to feign
bing the best faux pas footed friend...

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I am your champion, I fight for your cause,
my love and devotion give some people pause.

When I saw you I knew you, just like with your dad.
I guess our deep happiness makes some people mad.

I...

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Sorry you don’t love me
Sorry I loved you so much I almost killed you 
I didn’t know caring about you was crazy
It only made since cause you didn’t know how to do it like me
Thought...

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Prepping For The Test

The standardized tests in my country come from me
The questions are designed, refined, and masterminded in secret 
When they are perfected we feed them to the masses
In truth there are no answers...

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tooth ache
                nerves shake
                ...

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My teeth were bad
 My family was mad
 Horrible dentists I’ve had
 You are a dentist, you must be a cad

 Forced to your venue
 Long awaited dental care was to continue
 I prefer to...

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So sudden was the thrusts
So quick the pain fades
That my mind didn't fully comprehend
what it is my body was really doing
I spent hours thinking about this
and i've written countless poems
I always wondered what this would...

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Goldfish appear to prefer the color orange
They have no arms to reach conclusions 
Live out their lives in water bowls or tanks

Some college students swallow them as pranks 
Bad people with no manners
Gold fish are...

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Now I lay me down to sleep
In my home that's really sweet
Had three large meals and a snack
There wasn't a hint of any lack
Comfortable shoes and clothes that fit
My heart's desires my money can get
Friends...

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Inky Dinkys

Here in our family – our own vocabulary
Skizzors cut fabric – lettucini in our salads;
Flutterbies in the garden – burple for purple;
Empires on first base – the Umpire strikes back;
Alfanso Bedoya – no stickin’...

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'Tis said that God loves all His creatures great and small.
Here are just a few of them - I can't begin to name them all!
He loves us one and all the whole world wide from...

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Obsessed
and running tight circles
to a dream come true
Late for the future
an escape from monotony
trapped by a compulsion i cant explain
i wont admit it, and you prove it to me

obsessed
and dreaming of that day
living every moment...

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Time waits for no man.
The saying goes.
Does it not?
I beg to differ.
Yes , we are Governed by it.
Ruled by time.
Our lives are constantly 'on the clock'.
You have a due date at birth,
Sometimes early , sometimes...

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