Campfire Vampire

The vampire saw the campfire and was hovering around 
For all the little children were just sitting on the ground 
He doesn't mind the fire, it’s not ultra violet light
So he listens to his dinner telling scary tales all night

But when he feels that pretty soon it shall be getting light
He picks a chosen victim and he moves in for a bite
Alas his chosen breakfast was a little lad called Rob
Who turned around too early and punched the vampire in the gob

At the back a tooth went crack, the vampire squealed in pain
Holy flaming nuns, it hurts like I’m alive again
The vampire shrank and as a bat he fluttered into town
Snuck into a dentists where he pulled the shutters down

The dentist said ‘Your early mate, your time keeping is rash’
The vampire said you’ll fix me though I do not carry cash
The dentist grinned and said I have retirement looming large
So as my last good deed, my friend, I’ll fix you for no charge

The vampire thought the anaesthetic wouldn't work on him
And so he was surprised to find he’d dribbled down his chin
So lying in the chair, with the dentist in his face
The vampires jaws were numb as the dentist worked apace

The dentist’s constant chatter with his Adam’s apple bobbing
Did not distract the vampire from the jugular vein throbbing
Suddenly the vampire snarled, I’m starving, what the heck
He lunged to sink his canine teeth into the dentist’s neck

The dentist staggered back and yelled you hit me like a truck
Why on earth did you just give me one almighty suck
The vampire gasped, my canines fail me, it’s beyond belief
The dentist held his hand out and said, do you mean these teeth?

The vampire sobbed I cannot live without my pointy biters
The dentist said don’t worry, I’ll put back those ugly blighters
But first I’m gonna finish off that molar I was filling
Good job I am not charging you, for I would make a killing

So, the dentist said, the molar that you broke last night
Is finished once I’ve set it with this ultra violet light
Before the vampire could protest the light was in his mouth
Demonic hands burst through the floor and dragged the vampire south.
Copyright © | Year Posted 2021

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Pettit Avatar
March 31, 2021 at 6:04 PM
A very entertaining read that was written well.
Flood Avatar
April 1, 2021 at 12:22 AM
Thank you Robert. Glad you enjoyed. Terry
Laurie Avatar
March 13, 2021 at 3:11 PM
Hello Terry … a wonderful tale to read to children at bedtime. Another string to your imaginative mind - thanks Terry - Lindsay
Flood Avatar
March 13, 2021 at 3:20 PM
Thanks Lindsay. This was one of those writes that just seemed to flow unplanned from my metaphorical pen. Sometimes, as I’m sure you know, it just happens that way. Thanks again, Terry
Leffanta Avatar
March 13, 2021 at 11:39 AM
Well done! Enjoyed! Aloha! Rico
Flood Avatar
March 13, 2021 at 2:02 PM
Thanks, Rico. Glad you liked. Terry
Lamoureux Avatar
March 12, 2021 at 2:53 PM
Great story telling. This was fun.
Flood Avatar
March 12, 2021 at 4:28 PM
Thanks Richard. Who’d be a vampire when ultra violet light is in the hands of anyone with two AAA batteries? Cheers, Terry
Allison Avatar
March 12, 2021 at 2:00 PM
oh i wasnt expecting that twist at the end, I assume your story is the tooth the hole tooth and nothing but the tooth lol:-) hugs Jan xx
Leffanta Avatar
March 13, 2021 at 11:38 AM
Clever retort, Jan!
Flood Avatar
March 12, 2021 at 2:12 PM
I hadn’t had a filling for years, so when I had one a year or so ago, I was impressed by the little ultra violet light pen that instantly set the filling. I remember thinking then, ‘Good job I’m not a vampire.’ Thanks for your visit, Jan. Terry
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