Long Claustrophobic Poems

Once,
or twice, 
maybe thrice,
surely not
not fractal

A clan of crazy ecofeminists
conspired within an 88 unit residential castle
in their historically converted 
sometimes hysterically clueless condo
colonial-red predative brick 
badly bald aging building

With a sometimes soggy south walled school,
but...

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They called their gang The ReVolutionaries,
my Father Sun and Mother Earth drew time with them,
but they often called themselves Yang and YinYin,
respectively and mutually respectful
yet privately erotic,
not so much politically and economically
where Yang could not...

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Healthy nutrition research
starts with wealth producing past searches,
individual through community co-investments
in good and fragrant meals,
or even harmonic and graceful music with dance performances.

Ingesting healthy passions 
consumes PositivEnergy wealth
for future co-productive system projections.

My evidence for future...

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I'm so confused,
raised to believe cooperative love overpowers competing fears
about scarcity of time, 
and other resources,
and anger about past over- and under-valuing of myself
as a regenerative resource,
CoPresence Source,
raised to believe the Golden Rule
is most effectively...

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Some days and nights
I am terrorized by death,
cold silo ache-echoing fear,
claustrophobic breathless dark
barking inevitable factness and finality
of my decomposing mortality,
and posthumous demise,
probably post-humorous as well,
should we discover any essential difference.

What good is death
if it cannot...

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I wonder if everyone
has a most dreaded dreamed
nightmare worst way 
to conscientiously drop wrong dead.

Mine is claustrophobi-recallish buried
half alive at best is worse
in a wooden rough pine crate.

I'm feeling angry with those who raped,
then buried...

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This is how it starts
the decline of who we are, the decline of something more
the start of wars
Installed in us is confidence
confidence, a blessing or a curse
Without confidence we stand degraded, disenchanted, alone
while with too...

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Back in the height
of our pre-millennial military-industrial
post-revolutionary days
of competing excess...

No, love,
Stick with
Once upon our Sacred Times...

Once upon a time
here in the US of Northern Americas
we used a Reservation Model
to dispose of hopelessly disabled aboriginals,
too RightBrain...

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To faith communities
and fraternities,
brotherhoods
and sisterhoods
and sororities,
local non-profits
and friendly neighborhoods,
mediators
and counselors,
cooperative associations,
trauma-informed learning theorists
and practitioners for resilient
mind/body peace,

Do not deceive yourselves.
Continuing to gaze and daze 
on a monotonous monocultural path

Disassociating 
internal v external
navel v social 
my...

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My continuing impatience problem
with smug fundamentalists
self-asserting holier than thou moral positions,
is that Christ's main point is not
Holier Than Others, like Chosen People
but Holier With Thou,
as one interdependent EarthBound BodyMind.

British King James monotheistic readers
digest at AntiLiteraturist...

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They say society's heart
is changed by story
and not by theory.

But what is history
if not also a theory about evidence
for healthy and pathological stories?
Experiences,
narratives,
parables,
analogies,
ecologies,
theologies
with active Yang EgoSubjects
and yin Eco Understories
favoring healthy WinWin ego/ecological theory

Entering the last...

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Much has been felt
then written
about loneliness at the top

Less written,
yet perhaps far more often felt,
about claustrophobia in the center.

Problems with delegation,
boundaries,
predictable timelines,
responsive management focus,
follow through performance,
closeted partisanship,
competitions to be heard
listened to
appreciated
respected 
for our therapeutic,
and not...

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We could speak together,
Decry rabid violence of chronically stressed kids
and young adults acting like kids,
apparently regardless of income or race;
perhaps not of enculturation.

Feeling claustrophobic,
anxious about an unpromising competitive future,
drowning in inch-deep and narrow boxed-in mentoring...

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ThanksGiving advances

Arising thoughts about boundary breaching risks
and perennial partisan issues
and deep listening opportunities.

Perhaps only the Othering
and Othered One Percent
instilling in their children
and future grandchildren
that extended family meals
are never an appropriate time
or sacred space
to speak of...

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The structure is imposing, massive and fearful.  Built in 1862 as a jail and
gallows for the worst of humanity.  "Living"  conditions were sickening and
appalling.  The top floor was reserved for death-row...

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"Evolution
takes its sweet time
in its work
on our collective consciousness;
the lasting leap from fear to love
in the human mind
will be its masterpiece."
     Walking to Listen, p. 139
     Andrew...

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It was the summer of 2014, I was just about to turn 13, spending June of summer vacation with my Grandmère, in Paris. Tonight, we’re at a fundraising benefit for African relief (it’s always *something*)....

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Easy to get stuck 
inside my head 
outside Earth's neglected 
aching hearts

Breathing in and out togather
fumes of historically fueled
graphite sheeted walls
too all-encumbering to smell
as monoculture's indoor trauma

Failure to wonder
nuanced appositional
wandering outdoor non-positions,
dipolar bipartisanships
passing in transitioning...

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Punishing for revenge,
could this occur to natural systems
without capacity to imagine alternative futures?

Punishing others for their defiant behavior,
actions and words stronger than merely ignorant
bolder than merely angry with each other, and ourselves,
but how much more
to...

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I doubt it was a philosopher,
more likely an emperor,
but possibly both,
who first explored this sad relationship
between exclusion
and punishment,
colonialism
feeding repression.

I'll bet it was a Taoist mother
afraid bad weather would smother
all hope of restoring future peace
who first...

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Waking up to despair,
sadness,
bone-tired at war with a beeping alarm clock,
an alarming list of immediately urgent responsibilities
without an opportunity in sight,
or at least not this first despairing fright,
at end of night.

If this sounds familiar
as at...

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The wails that disturb very few in their bed
Reach only the ears of the psychic… or dead

                  ...

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Written: April 27, 2024

                      ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 Seraphic, sibilant wisdom,
    a grace-gorged vista,
...

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I have been reading a rootless thesis:
Lack of commitment to a permanent home
causes depression,
over-commitment to inside claustrophobic voices,
failing deep-rooted immune systems,
obesity,
disassociation,

Fear of outdoor climate pathologies,
un-walled infestations
alien predators
threats to our own ongoing ecopolitical empowerment
too competitively overwhelming
to...

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Around the corner 
Of the unpaved driveway
Was a claustrophobic shack

The front door 
Was once a cherry red
Like his father's 1968 Cadillac

My car door 
echoed 
As my heels stumbled across the driveway

Caught my balance on the...

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