I love how deep your eyes are
and the spark they have in them
I love how big and your smile is
and the way it gets me
I love your thick, dark and curly hair
and how they move with you
I love your delicate soft hands
and how warm they are when you hug me
I love how caring you are
and always ask how I am doing
but above all i love the feeling i have
when I am around you
and even the feeling i have
when I think about the fact
that I’am never going to have you
but I’m always going to love you
Definition: programmed cell death/cellular suicide
in an attempt to remedy damaged components,
neatly shrinking and dismantling damaged parts.
A cognitive dissonant conscious
exists at a crossroads.
My mind fractures at the mere thought
of going back into the closet of deferred romantic pursuits,
even if hiding can ensure survival.
My dilemma encapsulates the quintessential concept of coming out.
Taking a step out of closeted comfortability
opens up the avenue for external toxicity,
while retreating into latent potential is
unintentional self-immolation.
My disillusionment with organized religion
came as a result of my realization of its
ambivalent nature.
Church clothes clothe hidden judgement;
secrets ingrained in button downs,
sinners treated like cash cows,
and knees sore from repeated attempts at repentance.
You were not like that.
Though you suffered the stings of persecution's arrows,
your humanity,
the morality you possess from the altered reality we commune in,
was ever more human than the prized proprietors of the pulpit.
Our lives entail getting used to
the ground moving underneath our feet,
for we are immune to inertia, my love.
Hold me once more as you journey onward into fragile memory.
Goodbye Bible Camp Girlfriend, goodbye.
if only she knew how i thought about her
about the way she makes me smile
the way my heart swells inside
when i picture her walking down the aisle
i want her to see that she’s more than a friend
she’s suddenly become my whole life
i can’t imagine a future without her
i dream of becoming her wife
i wish that i could tell her
be open about how i feel
but i know that she’ll never feel the same
and our friendship could never heal
but her name has slowly merged with mine
i feel that our hearts have become one
i dream of stroking her blushing cheek
but i know that she’d be gone
i want to reach towards her hand
and hold it tight in mine
to gently kiss our entwined fingers
until between us there is no line
if only she could realise
she’s perfect in every way
and i only dream of holding her close
of becoming more than friends one day
i like the way she smiles, but all girls talk about each other like that
he smiles at the way i laugh, but frankly he’s just not my type
and i want to love a boy in the way i love the sea
but rather than falling in, i just kinda sink
is it supposed to feel this way? like im lost in a tidal wave
the current’s pulling back and forth
i feel i might snap in half, but when i look in her eyes everything seems fine
i want to love a boy the way i love the sky
i want got be in cloud nine, not just passing by
and i want to want him more than anything my heart wants
but when the truth comes out it’s the moon that he’ll find
i’ll never love a boy in the way i love the moon
so human, far, and flawed, everything i’d loose
in a boy’s eyes im nothing but a seed
maybe i’d like to sprout far from the sea
Lying in the afternoon sunbeam hues,
Ambers and violets warm our flowerbed.
Beside rivers of pastel pinks and blues,
Floating, milky clouds stitches up our threads.
And as I lie within our lovely field,
Gaze lost in your pearls, squeezing your soft hand,
I exhale. My hard prejudicial shield
Migrates for summer, while birds and bees land.
Sure, in the city, beneath a new moon
Night, dark enough stars serve as lonely lights,
Someone in the ice glazed dirt curses you—
Wave at them, my opal gem, stand upright,
The city’s chaos does not touch us here,
Our love belongs—To be qu eer is not qu eer.
They asked me if I'd ever been with someone.
I told them,
I have been with a girl.
I talked to her until the moon turned to sun,
and an absence of childhood stories
became our own tale of normalcy being absent from our lives.
Childhood dreams not yet realized,
because heterosexuality was not realized in them.
Cherries stain her fingers bright,
Deep and dark as midnight wine.
She pops them slow between her lips,
Her smile lazy, soft, divine.
The window's cracked to summer air,
The city sighing, fast asleep.
She smokes and laughs, her lashes low,
Her secrets folded warm and deep.
The cigarette burns slow and thin,
Forgotten in her careless hand;
I lean to kiss the cherry taste
And feel her breathing where I stand.
Her teeth are gentle on my skin,
Her lips a quiet, glowing spark;
She bites, she soothes, she bites again—
The night is soft, the hour dark.
The clock has stilled, the world is far,
Just cherry pits and curling smoke.
The moon is pale against the glass,
And every kiss a promise spoke.
We stay until the sky turns gray,
Our shoulders bare, our feet entwined,
And every cherry, every kiss,
Is sweet and slow and wholly mine.
If our love is a sin, then heaven must be full of such tender and selfless sinning as ours— Radclyffe Hall
Explore themes of love and identity
Of Stephen Gordon’s innate sense of masculinity
Since a child, her desire, ‘women’
The idea that if love is considered a sin
The unfolding of a female sexual invert
The act of loving must be a tender selfless act, revert?
Love itself is not inherently sinful or
complexities of love, we shan’t ignore
But rather the circumstances surrounding it
Misfits from Malvern to London and then to Paris!
Ira furor brevis, the frailty, taboo and strife
Fellow q***r characters, all walks of life
From the *sapphic salon hostess Valérie Seymour
To the 'miserable army' and more
of outcasts that frequents the 'merciless
Drug-dealing, death-dealing' bars of Montmartre
Written in another time, still support and solidarity to
generations of LGBTQ genre
*Sapphic is an umbrella term for same-gender loving women or woman-aligned people, including lesbians and bisexual+ women. It is used to describe topics, activities, and ideas related to same-sex attraction among women. The term can also refer to the Greek lyric poet Sappho.
I am a rainbow kid
I take pride in who I am
And embrace the crown as I am
These colors I embrace,
This rainbow, running through my blood stream.
They call it debased,
But, I call it redeemed.
My identity I embrace,
Out of the ordinary,
I've Created my own special place.
Showing a full display to the world,
Freely,
Unapologetic,
And delightedly
There’s a tugging in my chest
It leads me straight to you
Bubbling, broiling love and luck
Of pink and golden hue
A kind and sweethearted soul
Deserves the world anew
And when she talks, my heart goes light
And face burns red for you
Sweetheart, sweetheart, hug me close
Pull me tight to you
My little blue jay, birdie, love
Fire alarm, love me too
I'm willing to worship
Any girl that calls me a name other than disgusting
The world is progressive
But it has not moved forward
I turn to face the linoleum, saying,
"Oh the ceiling is looking mighty fine today"
And then they squeal
"Ew, she's looking at me!"
Report me to the principal if you dare
I dare you to be outed
And still have to show up to class every day
I leave the locker room
Gym shorts and ugly gray t-shirt
Covering up the undeserved shame I feel
I'm just focused on trying to make the volleyball team
I'm not worried about how high you're hiking up your shorts
It doesn't make you look cool
Oh, and Josh, I talked to him
He doesn't like you
I hope your Christian parents
Can see how you dress when they aren't there to check in the morning
Putting on mascara that's full of vulgarity
And misleading phrases
Your pretty polished faces made middle school living torture
I should have stayed in the closet
Instead of coming out for you
i see the way you look at him,
holding his hand,
kissing him,
and i see you’ve been cursed.
cursed to love a man you never truly loved,
cursed to lose the girl who gave you butterflies.
if you were a boy,
you said, so many years ago,
i think i’d want to kiss you.
so unsure of yourself in your sentences
out of fear of being cursed with a life sentence
damnation, you said.
but how could a love so sweet be so wrong.
how cruel for a sixteen year old girl to hear these words,
i cut my hair,
i bound my chest,
i made myself a reflection of who the world wanted,
in order for us to be together.
i waited for you.
but time did not wait for us, my dear,
your parents laughed when you brought me home to meet them,
then their laughs turned to violence
when they saw us
said we were cursed,
laying with the devil
they turned your bright green eyes into
swollen shades of blues and purples.
now, nearly twenty years later,
i see you with him,
saccharine smiles,
absorbing his touch
like a reluctant sponge.
heartbreak is not nearly strong enough a word for this kind of pain.
my love,
we were never cursed,
the world was.
Does it all matter?
That I am gay, I am a lesbian?
Does it all matter?
that I am transgender, I am Intersexual?
or rather Asexual?
tell me,
Why does it matter
how I walk,
How I dress,
How I speak.
Is my confidence threatening you perhaps?
That you want to crush my spirit so bad
with silly questions and remarks.
I am a she, she is a she
and the bravery of asking "who is the man in the relationship"
I mean...?
Can't you see the breast breathing out the chest?
He being a he, dating a he
and you still ask the same question " who is the woman in a relationship"
I mean...?
Do ya'll understand what sexuality is?
Do ya'll understand its fluidity?
However, it shouldn't even matter to you what gender anyone is attracted to
It is their life afterall,
Go clear your confusions in encyclopedias
In CAPS this is my conclusion,
It is none of your business who I attract,
and it is none of your business who I am attracted to.
Perhaps this is the kind of letter you have been waiting to recieve
SEXUALITY is FLUID.
I cant help but ask why.
Why did she become my friend way back in year 12.
She was so funny, and kind, and perfect.
so perfect.
Why would she choose to spend time with me.
I wasn't fun.
I was quiet, and sad most of the time.
But she chose to stay with me.
A year has past and I'm still asking why.
Why did she kiss me after walking me home in the rain.
She's gorgeous and can get whoever she likes.
I've never met anyone like her.
She deserves the world,
and i will never understand why,
but in her eyes,
i am her world.
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