My trip to the funny farm
Treated cold places
Where should be warm
I stared into onyx abyss
Where angst chases
Desire off denim cliff
Yet I dare to dream in color
Trump has depicted himself as Jesus
he puts his hand on someone as if to heal them
It seems he has lost his mind
Thinking he is now divine
Some are calling for the 25th Amendment
He needs to be on the funny farm
So he can cause no more harm
Sir Billy Pig’s missing his oats
Miss Piggy Wig’s had hers, she gloats
But she’s looking so rough
Her bum’s full of crap stuff
Its output is brown and it floats!
I’m advised by a pal of mine
To “Never cast pearls before swine”
Or put lipstick on a pig
When it’s mouthing off big
Miss Piggy Wig’s an old bovine!
Funny farm or loony bin?
Depends what kind of mood I’m in
Mad house increases my lunacy
I take my pills and watch tv
Fall asleep, don’t care if it is night or day
The attendants are glad, I am out of their way
This asylum increases my natural lunacy
Weird attendants seem worse off than me
Chickens clucking, pecking paths in the dust
Cow bawling for the calf who loves her bust
Turkeys gobbling, heads nodding
Cats purring, dogs applauding
Farmers heeding, flapping hands in disgust
A funny Limerick - Any Theme Poetry Contest
Sponsored by: Tania Kitchin
Used How many syllables
June 9, 2022
Farmer Frank
raises redickilous
alliterative animals at
Farmer Frank's
Furry, Feathery Funny Farm:
Comedical Cows
Daffious Donkeys
Punnious Pigs
Tongue-in-cheeky Turkeys
Chortifiable Chickens
Showoffitty Sheep
Buffoonic Bulls
Offbeaten Ostriches
Goofian Goats
Hilaric Horses
Slapstickitty Steer
Riotful Roosters
Laughening Llamas
Howlinious Hounddogs
Cartoonic Cattle
Rip-Roarable Rabbits
Hoomerous Hoot Owls
Looniful Lambs
Hysteric Heifers, and of course...
Yakkity Yaks.
Don't talk back!
written 24 Aug 2020
I'm really an adult though my lims don't show it
Why should I grow up, there's more fun to emit
Words like ga ga and goo goo
Or poopy and doo doo
Run when the funny farm wants me to commit
I'm really an adult though my lims don't show it
Why should I grow up, it's more fun to emit
Words like ga ga and goo goo
Or poopy and doo doo
Run when the funny farm wants me to commit
I'm really an adult though my lims don't show it
Why should I grow up, it's more fun to emit
Say ga ga and goo goo
Or poopy and doo doo
Run when the funny farm wants you to commit
Trump On A Funny Farm
Trump's lips do look like Donald Duck
Sad imitating palsied person when he does cluck
Like a cruddy chicken carries on and on
Sure hope pretty soon he will be gone.
Down people he will cut and criticize
Has short stubby hands and sleazy eyes
Then he really tries to put you to the test
When he starts a head-butting contest.
To keep up with Trump we simply refuse
Way people does mishandle and will misuse
Thought of him as President surely alarms
He belongs on either an animal or funny farm.
James Thesarious Hilarious Horn
Retired Veteran and Poet
I fly through the smoky air
then I poke a big brown bear
I balance on a tight rope
and I slide down a steep slope
I eat a ball of fire
and I do things to admire
I clown around and juggle
but with sharp knives I struggle
the things around me do break
but only when I’m awake!
my audience stops to stare
at the straight jacket I wear
bars in my window number
I count till pills bring slumber
One obnoxious orangutan ordered oysters
Staff sympathetically said such supplies sold
Constantly complaining confronting chasing customers
Barred because before being boisterously bold
Two timid tigers tragically trembled
While watching woeful weasels wrestle
Standing straight shaking subconsiously scared
Displaying discomfort dizzy dribbling dreadful
Three talented turkeys taught tricks
Creating courageous crazy circus clowns
Amazingly always attempting additional acts
Frolicking foolishly finally forgetting frowns
Four fabulous flamingos fixed fences
Gigantic glamorous gardens generously grew
Proud pedestrians passing praised perfection
Beautiful bouquets blissfully blended blue
Five fussy frogs found french fries
Every enchanting experience eagerly entertained
Loudly laughing licking lemon lollipops
Sharing sarcastic smirks showing shame
12 April 2016
I live on a farm in the sky;
we milk all the pigs as they fly;
at harvest we reap
the eggs from the sheep,
and shear woolly cows in a sty.
cluck,oink,meow,quack,maa
cock-a-doodle-do,moo,baa
tis my wild kingdom
written 2009
They came to take you away
Napoleon the fourteenth
We remember that ditty
from decades ago.
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