Freddy Poems

Freddy The Mailman

Based on Frosty The Snowman

 Freddy the mailman is just out on parole
 He did the crime and served his time
 For all that mail he stole
 Now Freddy is back as Christmas bells chime

 Freddy the mailman is now a con man people say
 He charms the ladies with words sweet as honey
 Deceiving

Petty Freddy

Written By:  D. Collins 9/17/24


Petty Freddy's a man no child would want to be.
Void of selflessness and human morality.
Stuck on stupid because it is all about him.
May be why wifey doesn't travel to Wisconsin.


This is as clear as day, without stating names.
And, for his infidelity he gave Biden the blame.
Can you see a Petty

Freddy Farkle

Freddy Farkle, fumbling forecaster for Forestville,
friggin' fudged Friday forecast....fair?!
first florid felicitous, falling flurries followed,
froze flowers, foiled!
faraway farmhouse, furrowing farmland,
frigid fanny, furious, frustrated,
frumpy, frazzled!
furry forest friends furnished flannel frock,
finding Freddy's fails funny, frivolity,
fortunately frequent fallible forecasts
found Freddy flying faraway,
fallaciously forecasting for fermented folks!

He Felt Like Freddy In My Fair Lady

I felt like Freddy in My Fair Lady today
Said the young lad who had a glorious day
In the window was his crush, Miss Ida Mae.
She batted her eyes, and he decided to stay

Look at this trick he said, climbing the post.
She giggled at him, not caring that this was a boast.
You are such a Freddy!

Freddy Mercury's Iconic Pose In Statue

Freddy Mercury's iconic pose captured forever
London lost out on negotiations
bronze statute now in Montreux Switzeland
Home of Mountain Studios
Where he recorded seven albums
including Made in Heaven

Freddy

There once was a man named Freddy
he worked very hard and steady
	his battery wore out
	recharged in the blackout 
now he’s Freddy Never Ready

Freddy Mercury

I would like to pull him out of heaven for a day.
Let him know how much he has done for each and every gay.
I would tell him how much we still admire him so.
I would hold on to him tightly, trying to never let him go.

I would ask him if Queen was to make fun

Freddy In My Cupboard

Oh Freddy ,
Freddy my buddy
you haunt my dreams,
and you play the violin
you sit on my couch,
wearing a bloody pouch
you giggle and you creek,
all your wooden little teeth
your buckle is black,
and a button you lack.
It pours acid rain,
when you run through my drains
your fingers they're cold,
as they choke me with their hold
your eyes they roll,
as you

Freddy, the Astronomer

Most astronomers gaze up at the stars
But Freddy took pretty women to bars --
   He'd get in big brawls
   Crash into brick walls -- 
When he came to, he'd have sworn he saw Mars

Freddy and Frieda Flea

Both Freddy and Frieda Flea
Had an itch and felt the need 

To leave their home on Beagle back
So they packed their bags while Fido napped

They'd heard magical tales of the Big Top
Since their larva days on top the pup

They weren't here this time to clown around
As they found themselves circus bound

They hitched a ride in

Freddy Frog

Freddy Frog flipped hopped on 
punned to pond on and on
No more sudden leap to milk-moon
Broken limbs and ache moist June
Freddy Frog's fantasies now fanatics, fun

The Job For Freddy

The Job For Freddy
Tying knots was the job for Freddy
It didn't pay much, but was steady
Early to work
He would not shirk
I guess you'd call that knot ready!

The Freddy and the Twist

The Freddy, the Twist, the HitchHiker too

60’s dances I love so.

Never dreaming they’d die.

Freddy Poucher

I heard of Freddy Poucher
When I was just a kid
Although I never met him
I knew everything he did

Freddy Poucher was the boy
That everybody knew
And everything that Freddy did
You did not want to do

He was the boy who went to swim
When lunch was done at camp
Because he didn’t wait long enough
He got a stomach cramp

He was

Freddy Krueger's Pen

Even through the ugliness, I make my words lovely
But your dreams are about to turn ugly
This is the wrath of Freddy Krueger's pen
Past demons and future sins
You could lose your limbs
With the way I use the pen 
One, two, I'm coming for you
You've Got some running to do 
Your streets worst nightmare
With the words I

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