Best Schmuck Poems

the times I've been here, words in hand
          mind-sculpting verse of phrases, grand
   ...

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Ron Dump says he’ll destroy North Korea
With finger poised, we have so much to fear
He’s a power mad glutton
With his hand on the button
Will the...

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My small way of showing anger for this year's circus of an election process:

I recall when George Bush had to duck

a thrown shoe, or he...

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Give a man a fish, he'll eat for a day.
At least that's what I hear.
Teach a man to fish and he'll sit in a rowboat
fishing...

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Warning, if you are under 60 you may not "get" some of these.

Mohammad Ali
taunting with poetry,
his opponents he'd zing
as he danced 'bout the ring.

Graham Kerr...

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When mom, Naomi, was your mom not quite,
she was a barista at the Starbucks
just blocks away from where your thunderstruck
dad used to curse the name...

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My wife went shopping yesterday
Posted missing what do the police say
Her weight color and eyes
Please tell me he cries
I need to know for the missing's...

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He cheated on you- what a surprise
You’re wife #5 in his pattern of lies
Did you think he’d be loyal ‘cause he gave you a ring?
Did...

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A 60 second embrace, held too long
A kiss on the forehead, felt so wrong
Add more bullets to my long list of regrets
You are one of...

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Poor old Dan was a bit of a schmuck
Ran out of gas in his brand new truck
Now late for his date
Boy, was she irate
No hanky...

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Went to the well and the well was dry

So what shall I do, oh me, oh my

My mind's in a quandary, what shall I do

I...

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-------*To be read in true Italian Mafia voice....--------

I wanna meet the wise guy.
You know, the pai·san gettin' cute with the Soup!

Cuz' the CAPTCHA preview characters...

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Care free driving down the lain, 
sites of yesteryear refrain, 
Children playing inn there yards, 
Tattered houses somewhat scarred. 
  
Traveling inn gay apparel,...

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The redneck was drunk as a skunk 
Couple of dozen beers he had drunk 
Staggered round the corner into his street 
He noticed the flames...

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IT’S WHAT IT IS …
If every day you sleep in church; you may not know God
You are not necessarily spiritual; but you are pious
If you’ve...

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