Best Chuck Poems
There was once a guy named big Chuck
Who always seemed to have terrible luck
Until he met June
One sunny afternoon
She left him for a Doc, that offered a nip tuck
5-31-17
Alexis Y.
I will no longer be trying to cook a hearty Chuck roast
For it usually ends up dry,and about as dry as burnt toast
I tried so many ways to cook this hunk of meat
Though in the end the results,are definitely no treat
That cut of meat to me doesn't seem to be the best
For it never turns out,quite as good as the rest
I know how to cook them,steady,slow,and low
And to use a slowcooker is the best way to go
If your going to make a roast,use a rump,a round,or a sirloin tip
Stay away from those Chuck roasts,and it will surely be a hit
I guess their is no one to blame for these mishaps you see
For I was the only one cooking them,Chef Danny,that's me
Dannyboy:9-7-12
:oP
Chuck Berry is eighty one
still performing and having fun,
it is a while since fifty- five
when his repertoire became alive.
© Harry J Horsman 2012
Here comes Buck Toothed Chuck
from Hickville Street,
sorriest feller you
ever did meet.
Walkin' his flea bitten dog
down the street, scratchin’ his head
and flip flopping his feet.
If he asks for money
best say, "No way"!
'cuz it'll slip through his fingers
in less than a day.
He'll be spittin' tobackee
the whole day through,
'cuz he ain't got nothin'
better to do.
There goes Buck Toothed Chuck
from Hickville Street,
hasn’t had a bath in
over a week,
Best steer clear cuz' the
smell ain't sweet,
sorriest feller you
ever did meet.
You can gargel peanut butter
And slam a revolving door
You were born with a beard
And at the age of two drunk your first beer
And afterward crushed the can on your head
You never run thats why you are Walker Texas Ranger
You help old ladies across the street and tell children not to talk to strangers
When you play monopoly
It affects the whole world's economy
And your biggest secret is Too-Wong-Fu is your favorite comedy
You don't have any microwaves in your home because you believe revenge is a
dish best served cold
And if all that isn't enough
You beat connect 4 with one move
Ate a bottle of sleeping pills and just blinked
Chuck Norris you are amazing
Bucking Did Duck Did Chuck
Have you ever seen a bucking duck cluck?
Maybe he fell down and did not suck
Into the oats and grain for he could not duck
The bucking, clucking, duck could not fill up on muck
Could he wallop an ugly duck of Chuck’s wallop of pucks?
Of woodchuck, woodchuck then maybe he should pluck, duck.
Written: 11/26/14
Theresa Marie Hummingbird
There is a man we call him ChuckSluck
I must admit his poems don’t suck
He drives a corvette
Which put him in debt
But with the girls has given him luck
"Hey kids! have you seen the keys for the door
I'm sure I put them down there before
I'm thinking this place is haunted
Or is your mother being taunted
Own up, or your backsides are gonna be sore"
Why cant I find my keys?
Pardon me, Excuse me, I'm sorry
Don't say these words on a safari
Lions will eat you
A tiger will too
Real soon you'll look like calamari
There is always a way, the optimist says,
Yet the creak of life’s tensions groan low,
They shadow the quake that the floor he walks makes,
And the air as it travels says so.
See the mist pale & thick,
It caresses each tip, every leaf, every needle and frond,
He smiles a wide smile at a metallic knell
Like sweet chiming bells,
Speaking scenes to his minds inner eye.
The paleness surrounds like great steam clouds,
Then a strong rasping sound cuts in with a short rhythmic note,
He sees a blue breaking through, the white tendrils grow few,
he gazes on grey shining ribbons of track
With a curve running clean through fields of sage green.
Wheat silos by pale gold hay stacks.
Then with curses and clumps the foreman climbs up and
Hauls another rasping board to his stage,
“Hey grab hold of this mate! You’re making us late”,
As a bucket of clamps clatters down!
So with a spanner in hand he re-joins the gang,
And puts his hand to a galvanised pole,
It’s cold and damp to his grip, and he feels his heart dip,
As he thinks on the way life now goes,
Lost in terraces grey while for hours he slaves,
So far from his Wichita home,
With his quiet English wife and two children besides,
And too soon, into a day nursery they'll go.
But dear God in heaven the sign said 7 to 7,
Is that the start to a balanced home life?
© Joe Maverick 2010
Cool Chuck
The first time-- on the school dance floor
Feeling hot, yet thrilled and much more
You’ve been there…tortured, waiting but looking around
A guy saw me hanging on the wall, just staring at the ground
I looked up to see this guy coming my way
Nervous---wanted to run but had to stay
When he pulled me in, had to stand on my tip-toes
Like the first sprinkle of rain… then and there-- I began to fall
Johnny Mathis love song and him holding me so tightly
Ohhh, feeling his breathe, he whispered in my ear ever so lightly
You’re Callie aren’t you… Gold dust...My name is Chuck
Purple velvet meshes against the face ---me, pitifully awestruck
Never, can't disremember that flutter in my heart
Erotic yet innocent in simultaneous start
No foolishness with him…he lured me right in
Our bodies swayed together feeling as if it were a sin
Kissing my neck aware he was in charge
My feelings were obvious and way too large
Moving to that slow song body to body, we both knew
Like never before, cool Chuck had felt it too
Remembering that night long ago with his kisses on cue
Brings a smile to my face as though it were all new
TO; Chet, CHUCK, DAD, MOM. & LARRY
Dear Chet, Chuck, Dad, Mom, & Larry
I thought of you all again today
As I always think of you all
As each day goes by
Chet I have never met you
as you were born and passed the same day
so I miss knowing you and getting to know you
you may be gone but I will not forget you
I miss the togetherness
I miss the visiting
I miss the calling
I miss the talking
I find things have changed
In ways I sometimes don't understand
As I get up each day I expected to see you
I know your not missing nor are you dead
I know your still alive as I am always thinking of you
as I know I will be with you all when my time comes
yes I know your in a better place waiting for me
Yes God has you all now
Yes all I can do is wait till we meat together again
As I do God's work
I find that some how your words still reach me
Yes I am filled with your presents once again
I do love and miss you all very much
As some day we will be together again
So till then I will be solace
And to remember you and think about you daily
will have to do till we meat in Heaven once again
In memory of Chet 1955, Chuck 1999, Dad 2000, Mom 2007, Larry 2011
Rev. Samuel Mack, OMS, DD
Copyright 2011
My feet are stuck in the muck, cried Chuck the duck.
Sean the swan came to his rescue across the lawn,
Chuck, grab my wing, and we’ll swing into the spring!
Chuck used his beak, as chic feathers tickled his cheek,
They flew out of the muck, we’re now unstuck, Sean clucked.
Chuck felt happy, Sean felt scrappy as they fished for crappie.
Chuck felt struck with luck as he caught one, but it stuck,
Sean the swan, brave and brawn, caught the prawn.
Now a pack, enjoyed their snack, as they happily clacked!
Chuck Norris
Too strong....
Never Wrong
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For the contest A FOOTLE RETROSPECTIVE
Beethoven was awakened by the sound of a guitar
Played by Chuck Berry, a rock 'n roll star
'When Beethoven heard those rhythm and blues
He ran to Tchaikovsky to tell him the news'
He made that guitar sing like no one else could
As he rocked us with 'Johnny B Goode'
'He stole a kiss at the turn of a mile
But her safety belt was stuck for a while'
So he had to take it slow
With no "Particular Place To Go"
He didn't know just what to do
When 'Maybellene' was untrue
She left him brokenhearted on the highway
As her cadillac sped away
He will play that guitar by an by
In rock 'n roll heaven up on high