Best Chewed Poems


Upside Down

If the leaf wore a tree
And the ocean ate fish;
If a flower sucked the bee
And beans ate the dish;
If a beggar was chief
And a boy was a girl
A song would be brief
If a bird wore a curl.
If the grass chewed the cow
And night turned to day
I'm wondering how
Work might be play.
Wouldn't it be great
If the sun was the moon
If early was late
And a line lost its tune.
If all of these things
Were natural to do;
Then a song wouldn't sing
And teeth wouldn't chew.
              ***

Foreplay

Yer briny whore
akin to boar
wit' mangy hide 'n scurvy-pocked
chomped 'n chewed
me black 'n blue
wit' carnassial chompers as of croc

Be curs'd, yer nit  
me ample bits
equated ter yer own be nowt 
yerz be carnivorous  
scaly 'n scabrous
yer plaque be axed ter beef up grout

Uncomely wench 
yer skunky stench
blunted me hook 'n scorched me beard
me peepers stung
me hornpipe hung
shorn ter th' bone 'n shrivelled 'n seared

Comely 'n curvy
riddled wit' scurvy
th' cap'n's whore-maid tooken yer whole
yer rat o' th' sea
holed and *****
yer fired yer cannon in a rottin' port'ole


Blow me down, lover!!  I love it when we talk dirty.

(Hahahaha.  I see the Soup powers-that-be deleted my word.  I swear it's not used as a swearword.  The word rhymes with "hussy".   lol)

Premium Member The Write of You

Inspired by the write of you
creamed through a paper sieve to cup
with both hands the leavings that you trail
 the write of you

like the chewed edge of hand pressed paper
like the apostrophe of lash on the cheeky page
I ogle the syncopated semen-antic drop of
 the write of you

how often does the wonder of you flash
across the film of my eyes unable reach
for I am so enchanted with the coffee-au-lait
 write of you


Cleaning Solution

Sticky smears on the table top.
on the couch spilled soda pop
one chewed up shoe and one flip-flop
I’m doomed to clean this mess non-stop
            
Greasy dog bones gone astray
found buried in the rug today
the hamster made a getaway
where he’s gone it’s hard to say.

The shower drain is plugged, I swear
the tub has grout and needs repair
dirty laundry everywhere.
it really is a mess out there.

Under beds dust bunnies show
all closets are on overflow
the fridge is packed with things that grow
dishes clog  the sink, I know.

Spaghetti sauce dumped on the floor
12 eggs broke, need I say more
fingerprints on every door
this place,  a never-ending chore

Just when I think things can’t get worse
the leaking fish tank cracked and burst
40 gallons was dispersed
I think this house is cursed.

In every corner, ledge and groove
dirt and grim must be removed
there’s one solution I approve
pack your things, we’re going to move!



Liz Relly – 3/06/2012
“Cobwebs and Dust”  Contest (new start)

Finding Forgiveness

Finding Forgiveness


Can you forgive my humble home?
A cardboard box my diamond dome
Can you forgive my scanty clothes?
The least that I worry of my woes
Can you forgive my crooked smile?
The frigid air a thermostatic trial
Can you forgive my lack of food?
Your leftover meals I have chewed
Can you forgive my hungry heart?
A life brand new I’m hoping to start
Can you forgive my tapering tears?
There’s little left after all these years
Can you forgive a saddened soul?
A love lost in an empty echoless hole
Can you forgive my losing of will?
A shattered stain of a splitting spill
Can you forgive my only existence?
For the Lord has in his holy presence.





Nov.06.2017
Healing power of forgiveness 
Sponsored by: Line Gauthier

A Possum of Worldly Descent Oh My

There was a possum
of worldly descent
Gathering diamonds
and things it had spent

Chasing a catfish
down dragonfly row
Wanting to see if
it was someone to know

Laughed at an aardvark 
with tangerine pants
Filling it's pockets 
with yesterday's ants

Climbed up a staircase
that led to the sky
Waving at meadowlarks,
saying goodbye

Chewed on a cabbage
it found by the gate
Wondering if it was 
something it ate

Sat down alone,
which was normal you see
Crying those tears
as it hoped it could be

Somebody's friend
that he never could find
Merely a possum,
just pay him no mind

He'll get along,
it's just something to do
And if he passes
in front of you

Maybe just smile
and tell him hello
He might be somebody 
you'd like to know 

Or let him be
without well wishes sent
For he's just a possum
of worldly descent


For the Dandelions Tiger Lillian and Bear berries Oh My Poetry Contest
Sponsored by Maureen McGreavy


The Old Dog

At a point where the old road meets the hill
and runs down the other side
There's an old tin shed that's standing, still
and a grave where the old dog died

He surely had seen better days
when our paths chanced to cross
As I lit up a fire and laid out my swag
he got up and wandered across

I could see from the look in the old dog's eye
that his race was almost run
but he sat by my side and offered his paw
So I gave him a pat and a bun

I cooked up some meat and he chewed on a bone
then he rested his head on my swag
We sat and we watched as the stars all came out 
and his tail did a slow steady wag

We fell fast asleep and I woke with the sun 
to find the old dog passed away
So I gathered him up and I buried him deep
and sadly I went on my way

It was later that morning I stopped at a farm 
to ask about work round about
and I happened to see a new litter of pups
one turned and came waddling out

He sat on the ground and he offered his paw
and I saw a strange glint in his eye
Had the old dog returned? Was he telling me now 
that I shouldn't be sad that he'd died?

Well I picked him right up and his warm puppy tongue
quickly licked off the tear from my cheek
I couldn't think straight, I was stunned and choked up
and found my knees going all weak

So I bought him right there and I gathered him up 
He settled right down in my swag
As I walked down the road I could feel the odd thump
as his tail did a slow steady wag.


From my PDF book "Bush Ballads and Bulldust"

Forget About Her

I can’t breathe.
It isn’t because I’m upset, 
Because I’m not.
Not upset.
I rarely am anymore.
No, that’s wrong.
I am,
Sometimes,
But it’s not painful
Like it used to be
Back when I had real emotions;
Back when I knew what it meant
To be human
And not an empty husk
With nothing going on inside.
I’m a husk, 
And God
But it hurts so much 
To be empty.
Words echoing,
Screaming,
Always screaming in my head,
Slamming their fists 
Against my battered throat,
Tripping over my bloody tongue,
Whispering past my chewed lips
Because all their power 
Was lost fighting me.
I’m my own villain,
My own executioner.
I wrap ropes around my neck
And take a leap of faith
Off the nearest building.
My community service?
Suicide.
Wipe my remains off
Of your three-hundred-dollar boots
And forget about the girl
Who used to sit across from you in class
With the saddest smile;
Twisting her depression
Into something almost edible.
Forget about the girl
Who stood for 
Everything that burns 
And curdles
And breaks.
Forget about the girl
Who used to be okay.
Forget about the girl 
Who’s nothing more
Than a streak across the pavement
And a brief vigil in the streets,
An excuse for tears
When she didn’t deserve them
In the first place.

Premium Member Ladies Nite At Clyde's Bar

News flash
Huge bash

Big fight
Last night

Clyde's Bar
Bizarre

War zone
Chairs thrown

Snouts poked
Gals choked

Eyes blacked
Ribs cracked

Hair snatched
Backs scratched

Throats slashed
Heads bashed

Tossed stools
Blood pools

Ears chewed
Tossed food

Knees kicked
Knives pricked

Low blows
Stomped toes

Dames sprawled
Cops called

Clyde's closed
Foreclosed

Premium Member Ding Go In Style

We buried our dog, Ding
With her favorite things,
Like our couch, plus our bed
And pillows for our head.

Our carpet she muddled
With dirt and pee puddles,
The window she stared through
To bark at who knows who.

The hedge she sniffed and chewed,
All of our leather shoes,
My truck’s passenger seat,
But not the children’s feet.

Two of our best chickens
She chased like the dickens,
Seven of my wife’s hats,
But not much more than that.

We paid a contractor
Who with a large tractor,
Dug a humongous hole
For our dear doggy’s soul.

And it did our heart good
Though we now sleep on wood;
Without a comforter,
Since we did comfort her.

Premium Member Haunted Woods

Dare not rove in the woods on Halloween 
There are witches there who are best not seen
They tempt one with brew that resembles stew
Truth is what goes in the brew’s not for you.

They put in chewed bones from fingers and toes
What they consider gravy, no one knows
Avoid the brew or you'll blow up and bust 
Ending up becoming a cloud of dust.

Stay alert for ghosts and ghouls, one must do
They're out to frighten the life out of you
Never accept a trick or treat from them
A trick is a prick from a toxic pen.

A treat is a sweet one should not dare eat
They are made from remains of frogs webbed feet
One would then croak and jump for evermore
Take this advice, stay behind your locked door.

Premium Member Meditations On a Derelict Wharf

The tide worn and barnacled pylons
holding up the wharf wobble 
on a sea swell like loose teeth.
Most of the decking planks
are missing. Those that remain 
span joists with bones
of rotted wood fastened down
with rust. A chain wire fence 
bars public access
and a large red sign
screams a message of danger.

I find myself looking through
the wire, asking who else 
would stop by and perceive
a strange beauty here,
that in the wreck
of this derelict wharf,
something immutable
has found a home in the rot. 
Its history
is not mine nor does it
conspire with a notion 
to snare me with a kind
of enticing nostalgia. 
What is here is more like
time chewed pick up sticks
stuck in mud.

And yet I don't know why 
I am moved so, standing here
with all the reverence afforded 
a relic of something almost holy,
why my pen should waste time
chasing such an elusive presence 
around a page.
Perhaps what is here
is an essence of what my mind
cannot grasp, that other,
a mystery imprinted on a finite world,
a longed for sign of hope
in a language known only
to the soul  -  or is it simply
something more mundane,
slowly loosening the pylons 
holding up my brain.

Premium Member - Black Night -

Sometimes
             the myths characterize us
             more than we realize
             You who have never been here before
             a nocturnal drama in the open air
             A worn and skinny body with bright green eyes
             Five hundred and two winters old
             That's what the king is looking for

             If only
             Friday the 13th was a lucky day
             listen ... a barking dog or is it a wolf
             No goddess of love has a broken heart
             The night was so long that the goat
             chewed several times on the rope of hunger
             Suddenly the light came on

             Maybe
             everything was nonsense
             and not scary horror at all





             02/08/2020
             Sun :) - A-L Andresen :)
             Copyright © All Rights Reserved


             If only, maybe, sometimes Poetry Contest
             Sponsored by: Silent One
             3rd place in the contest


             Poem Of The Day : 04/08/2020

Premium Member The Ghost Train

Along the mountain pine valley did the Iron Horse roar,
A steam belching black demon, burning red hot coals
Within it's steel belly.
Speed's hell bound creation, driven by greed's insatiable hunger,
Faster, faster it moves at acceleration rush, to
Achieve manifest destiny's final arrival on time.
In the distance hear another lone whistle blow, spitting,
And spewing with brimstone's gray smoke.
This indeed is the devil's train, carrying the forsaken,
To the depot of no return.
With a half empty payload aboard, Satan makes a deadly
Judgment call, stoke up those engines boys, ramming
Speed if you please.
Made man beasts are these mechanical monsters
Of destructions, lethal death weapons, chained
Down to the steel rails, and iron pikes.
Ebony stallion's racing against the winds,
As redden sparks sizzle and bite at the crisp autumn
Air, bellowing fumes poisoning the night.
The engineer of the 10; 15 out of Tombstone,
Checked his pocket watch, speaking impatiently,
He did so yell out, come along fellow's, we have a
Schedule to keep, and we've hours behind in our dead line,
So let’s pick up the pace.
Now the devil's train came out of know where,
With hell's supernatural master at the wheel,
Heckling, and laughing, relishing in the carnage’s
Utter calamity to come.
On a lone chewed up mangled piece of track,
Lies wreckages debris blood, flesh and twisted metal,
Lain stewned for miles beside the wild wilderness.
Broken bones, and sheared off limbs, weeping mother's
Cradling limp, lifeless bodies, crying why, God almighty
Why?
But the lord and heavenly father, had nothing to do,
With this unnatural disaster, nay the devil had many
Empty spaces to fill, and his passengers list was lean.
So he leveled the crimson ground with his dark gavel,
Taking souls at high velocities supernatural speed,
For this is the devil's ghost train, and it is so
Hell bound.

BY: CHERYL ANNA DUNN
© Cherl Dunn  Create an image from this poem.

Premium Member The Best Pizza

I could smell that fresh baked dough, rising up 
through the air. Created from double zero flour,
from Italy, carefully prepared.

A fine effort, was made to preserve this delicious
perfection. A secret recipe handed down from 
generation, to generation.

All the spices were fresh, to create an awesome
flavor. San Marzano tomatoes, fresh garlic,
and basil to savor.

The crust looked crisp, as this creation was pulled
out of a wood fire oven. Melted provolone, mozzarella 
and asiago, cheeses, I was Loving.

As I chewed, my taste buds were having a love affair
with the tomato sauce. For me it would never again,
be store bought. 

I would love to share a slice with you, because I know for
a fact, you'd find it delicious too!



Michael Tor 8/22/2015
Dedicated to all pizza lovers.

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