Benny the sad dog
artichokes, peas, carrots,
but no meat
for this sad dog to eat
Benny dreamed
many a dream
of being free from his owner
He could smell him from here
Extreme Body Odor!
Benny needed a plan
a plan to get away
of getting LOOSE
and catching the tail end of a Caboose
Benny would be free
free he would be
to hunt and eat his own prey
that would be the day!
Benny could not wait
wait to open this crate
to get out and be free
but what is that did he see
Benny saw the lock was not locked
he was completely shocked
how it could be unlocked
all he needs is the front door unblocked
Benny's owner was standing by the door
the door that led outdoors
The owner was talking to the UPS man
now was the time to execute this plan
Benny the dog made his way through
through the unassuming two
The two gave chase
trying to match Benny's pace
Benny passed this street
and passed that street
until he saw a squirl
Benny began to quarrel
Benny gave his owner enough time
time to catch him on 3rd and Pine
Benny's hopes were now dashed
dashed and fed with potatoes of mashed
They knew what to do with this guy:
they took Benny into captivity.
They knew what to do with this guy:
they certainly wanted activity.
He knew what to do with these guys:
he glared so his eyes would pierce.
He knew what to do with these guys:
he made those eyes look so fierce.
They knew what to do with this guy:
they truly manhandled his frame.
They knew what to do with this guy:
they kicked him, they wanted to maim.
He knew what to do with these guys:
he suddenly gave a sly smile.
He knew what to do with these guys:
from killing him they were a mile.
They knew what to do with each other:
such smiles and such glares were so many.
They knew what to do with each other:
A thing known so well by our Benny.
Exchange of such violence for guys
is clearly a thing of their choosing.
Exchange of such violence for guys
can be so much fun, so amusing.
(4 Sep 2023)
There was once a middle aged man from Geneva
Who everyone around, called Benny the weaver,
He preferred living in England,
As it was closer to Finland,
His girlfriend lived there, she was a dreamer.
Forgot her address never much of an achiever
Ended up in Sweden, got sick had a fever,
Collapsed in the street, an ambulance came,
The next day was better but forgot his name,
The Doctor sat with him, astute and very clever!
You Mr….the patient shrugged, have a bad heart,
I suspected this from the absolute start,
And unfortunately you have Alzheimer’s disease,
Do you know where you are, who you are please
But Benny forgot, had nothing to share or impart!
Benny opened his mouth for the first time,
Doctor he said I forget more and more its sublime,
Now I heard what you had to tell me today
I have a bad heart, but I forgot , what else did you say
What a shame, Alzheimer’s, and still in your prime!
The path of the righteous man
Is beset on either side
Of the torrential river rapids
But i have all the horses on my side
And there are no more fish left to eat
Since the water turned into blood
To be fed upon by a swarm of locusts
In the delta that God forsake
Until the only thing apart from sand left
Was an apparition or a mirage
Of an oasis in a desert
Remember Jack Benny, but hold your applause
for the master of the pregnant pause
'Your money or your life, Mr. Benny?!'
Folds his arms, rolls his eyes ~ Chuckles, then Guffaws!
...Applause!
Benjamin Kubelsky
Who became Jack Benny
Almost didn't change his name
~ It cost a penny!
It's Benny Hill here entertaining you all
With antics so silly, hilarious with falls
Irreverent without doubt
Scantily clad ladies throughout
Proud to be associated with this hilarious guffaw
It's Benny Hill here entertaining you all
With antics so silly, hilarious with falls
Irreverent without doubt
Scantily clad ladies throughout
Proud to be associated with this hilarious guffaw
Was told my humor reminds them of Benny Hill
But a Canadian version, what an enormous thrill
He was known for smut
That's how I'm cut
Creating sexual exploits for the guffaws they instill
Working like dogs to get there,
Finally she rested her warm skull against the curve of my neck.
I say skull because the weight of her head had been appointed
The Carrier of all Grief and Weariness in her pregnant body.
It was then we rolled into our old rhythms.
Our heads resting against each other
While rivers of thought rushed into lazy streams.
Warm light ran along the wooden columns that lead to
The perched squeaks of young children belting out carols.
All the while our one-year-old was putting on a show of her own
Jack Benny would've had dreams about.
There we were in the back of the church,
Laughing on mute, upturned by joy.
Born and bred ko kasi that built the boundaries that made me bold and brave with...
Everlasting memories that created the fuel for my natural elegance of self entered and electric self esteem...
Not just and ordinary nothing but a...
Narcotic that arouses not normal expressions but...
Yet leaving one yearning and yellow forward going without yielding!
Mr. Billy Benny sits, staring at a knife..
As bored as bored can be, in his very boring life.
He dipped a pen in tea - and drank a cup of ink,
The mirror sees him turn into a rosy shade of pink.
He shaved his black hair off - and stuck it on again,
He counted sheep, and 1 to 10, and rusted coins of yen.
He bought a yellow marker and drew pictures on a stone,
He made up jokes himself - which poked his funny bone.
Now, Mr. Billy Benny sits, staring at a knife.....
As bored as bored can be,in his very boring life.
Little Benny Ben told Roald Amundsen
Let's go to South Pole with my pretty hen
The hen was very stocky
Came to Ben with gait low-key
Asked for a diary and a gel pen
Benny O Bean stole a kingpin
Kept it secret in the cabin
Wife Sarah was a dork
And loved the grunter pork
And re-stole the pin for cookin'
There once was an
old man named
Benny.
Who never in life
saw a penny.
When once saw him
dollar,
he fainted in a hollar.
O poorest! the old
man named Benny.
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