Short Handy Poems
Short Handy Poems. Below are examples of the most popular short poems about Handy by PoetrySoup poets. Search short poems about Handy by length and keyword.
his name is plain
we call him bill
he never sit still
he always poping pills
he drinks out of a can
he is the
HANDY MAN
There was a bearded Irish man
who had the very largest hand
whose fingers plunged
when my hips lunged
all his digits at my command.
As sweet and fluffy as cotton candy
Is my love who is so handy
With his repair kit to fix things dandy
It's so nice to have man about___eyecandy
Our son"s name is Andy
He has a friend named Randy
Other people call him Handy Andy
Because he gets things done
He works alone
Getting his job done.
Handy Andy, fine figured and dandy
Asked his mother for a piece of candy
She gave him some gum
But she came undone
When he chomped it like their milk cow Mandy
Handy Andy, such a dandy;
Left his lunch bag in the pantry.
Ended up at a drive thru;
Where Chef Lou had the flu;
Sick Andy’s no so handy.
Rollo Rigby was a lover of candy
he kept a big supply ever handy.
But he became so obese
he waddled like geese.
He quit candy but is hooked on brandy
(making his life fine and dandy).
jack-o-lantern scooped out his own seeds
then carved out his face with a knife from Leeds
he looked amazing with his notorious face lift
being self-sufficient and handy is a wonderful gift
I went out with a boy called Andy
Whose tipple was Courvoisier Brandy
He was a typical bloke ~~~
But whilst drunk, he groped ~~~~
For the Brandy had turned this boy randy
http://www.thehighlanderspoems.com/humour-3.php
There was a craftsman named Handy
Who used to a craftsman dandy
everyday day he'd make
a craved wooden stakes
and boxes shaped like hearts to hold candies
7/11/19
Written words by James Edward Lee Sr. 2019©
She bought a gun for protection
Since the divorce was decided
Now walking out to their cars
After signing papers provided
Suddenly up jumped a large wolf
Her brand new weapon saved the day
When she shot her ex in the knee
An then easily got away!
There was a beautiful girl called Mandy
Barman Andy loved mixing her Shandy
He did strange cocktails
Topped with frothy ales
She blew off his foam, to sip the Brandy
A Funny Limerick - Make me Laugh Poetry Contest
Sponsored by: Tania Kitchin
Howmanysyllables 10/10/5/5/10
11/06/22
Carpenter Handy Dandy Livin With His Mommy
There's a man named Handy Dandy
Wore corduroy pajamies
His mom loved him sadly
For he was a 47 year old carpenter
He still lived with her
Still fixing every single floorboard
Handy Dandy is a good boy
A mother's joy
10/28/18
written words by James Edward Lee Sr. ©2018
If your second name is file
don't call your son Peter
If horse whispers spoke louder
would the horses not be trained sooner
Save pounds in batteries by only
putting them in the clock when you want to know the time
Make a trip to the zoo more exciting
by dressing as a zookeeper
carrying a gun
and ask people if the have seen a lion
Listen to poem:
The Handy Work of God
David J Walker
I call them my flowers
as if
They were really mine
As if I really
Owned the earth
as if I could
Make the sun shine
as if could
call down the rain
as if I could refrain
the storms angry hailstones
As if
I were anything more
Than the gardener
Admiring the handy work
of God
Andy's guided a train
Flown a small plane
Steered the wheel of a ship
Spurred a horse with a whip
Maneuvered a 64-foot truck
Kayaked in a typhoon
Won a motorcycle race
Landed perfectly on the moon
Then Andy went on a date
Pop, Pop -- two flat tires
Said, 'I'm not much with my hands'
Asked his date, 'Can you use these pliers?'
More break-up Senryus
to quickly, subtly cut that
relationship cord:
You’re a guy, I’m
a girl... it turns out we’re
just too different!
Look, It’s not you – it’s
me - turns out I don’t like
you much anymore.
Allegory time!
You're a turkey, ok? And
I'm going on a diet.
You smile at him,
and then say: "You've helped
realize I'm gay."
You have three hands; the third hand is the heart,
it squeezes and lets go, grabs and releases.
The heart that is a hand
pummels you from the inside when you fall in love,
it does not like to be ignored.
If you fall for another,
you had better let that hand in your heart
know that it’s the best of all hands
or it will forever let go and dump you.
It’s nice to know a handyman
To help when things go wrong,
Who fixes things around the house
And you don’t wait too long.
A pipe that drips, a door that sticks,
A light to be replaced
And any of a hundred other
Problems you have faced.
When someone with both time and tools
Can luckily be found,
Be grateful for his expertise
And hope he sticks around.
Please lend me your handy man
Let’s share HIM! Now that’s a plan
I too need some FUN
So be a dear, hon
And send me that Irish man
I won’t keep him very long
Oh, dear, now that would be wrong
I’ll send him to you
When my OOOOOOssss are through
For to you he does belong!!!!
EMG
OH I'm NAUGHTY! Please read Debbie Guzzi's Limerick ...The Handy Man! Deb...don't KILL ME!
Now, you see your mislaid candy,
Still your very property and handy.
So, don’t words with your sister bandy
Nor repeat that her hair is sandy:
You might be saying she was The Thief,
Recklessly priming her for noisy grief;
For that’s what ‘Sandy’ supplies in brief
Whilst no daughter thief is fathered by a chief …
And-Alas!-you let candy your mind swirl
Whereas neither gender nor age makes you a girl.