No Offence Poems | Examples

true blue pride

under this southern sky we all should adore
for this land has never burned with any war.

our life has always been one that is free
free from dictatorship...free from tyranny.

under the southern cross we show our true pride
from the desert plains to beyond the great divide.

under the blazing sun we play, work, sweat and toil
say "she`ll be right" when life spins with great turmoil.

our way is to add O or IE to many shorten words
to outsiders it must sound off beat...so absurd.

our friends we call every bad word under the sun
no offence taken...they know it`s only a bit of fun.

" `ken oath, he`s a drongo" a true blue knows what that means
from Tassie to the Territory...and everywhere in between.

coooee cobber...fair dinkin` your such a galah
we shouted out from our beat up holden car.

whether at a BBQ or down by the sea
it's an ice cold tinny for you...and for me.

our flag is one flown on flag poles oh so high
one we should respect...show our one true pride.

so let's all come together and be as one
in this land...under...the southern sun.

............
*to all the Aussies have a bonza day on Jan 26...and have a coldie for me

Premium Member My new political party

M  A  D  G  A
Make all donkeys great again..! In view of humanity
Moving away from our prime sources of energy.'
And in the aim of attracting..Um?? How should I
Put this?? The more stubborn voters(into the fold?)
No offence of harm has been carried out on donkeys
During the creation of this great new idea-illogical
Party' which I hope will garner billions in the cause of
Un-fixing things.? Well I am always hearing we are in
A fix.!!  And its not like people have not gained billions'
Running a similar set up.!
Hear me out..Out there..!! Hey come back.))))) I have
Free carrots..' Free carrots today..Oh no its the greens
Now..I must email back ( i know of no carrots in carcerated)
Its just way too pc for me!!


Premium Member Some things to consider?

In the ultimate heaven true peace you'll find, when things of
This world are left behind, no lying tounge will you there
Bind, no false teaching, or drunkeness, unless; of Gods
Spirit in kind' no more theiving or idolatry or hate; no rage
No letchery at this improved life state.' Vistas of beauty
All around.' A place of no discord where love abounds.'

Now on hell, I'll cast some thought to you, its heavily populated
If what I hear is true?? Its incedibly hot.' Theres sulphur gas
And demonic wails to top the lot.' There can be no lying
Once your in.' And words are useless with all the din.' So
You'll find no false teaching..Well whats the sense? No idol
Can save you..Now no offence!! You can't get drunk in this
Punishment place'  There can be no letchery, and you're held in
Place, your chains are darkness..Your thirst intense it 
Will get you screaming..' So in a sense? There are similaritys with
Heaven and hell, he's a copier 'old satan.I i often hear tell.'
So its up to choice; from what i see, I think I'll call on Jesus
Oh yes.' its that boring Heaven for me, may it be!!

Premium Member After the party I woke up in a tropical Island

the weather was hot, women were hot,
the beer was cool, and I had a few!
the food was so good, I gorged a lot,
slept with a beauty I hardly knew.
the waves roared in and splashed out all night,
coconut palms wriggled belly dance,
the full moon was drunk and flickered light,
the bats hung upside down in seance! 
around me was laughter and giggles,
weather and drinks bring best in romance,
all shapes, all ages, like coloured pickles,
jam of humanity grab their chance!
sunny morn probed my sedated sense,
knocked on my eyelids to open door,
I swore profanities! no offence,
sleep was heaven, and I wanted more!
soon i was nudged on my naked butt,
by an unknown paw, I kicked it off,
in my mind i thought- must be some s*ut
and mumbled something to say f*** off!
Then surprise! a big tongue licked my face,
I opened one eye, saw a black bear,
I got up and ran! feared it might chase,
but the bear looked away, did not care,
But I ran and ran like in a race!
I still recall those days of travels,
and many tales that I can tell,
but thought of that bear churns my bowels,
its black tail is a nightmare from hell!

My Wooden Casket With Strings

One might call it a 'guitar',
But, sadly, I have to call it my wooden casket with strings,
No offence to the instrument,
Its not that bad of one really,
It's just something with me,
A personal grudge,
I have been playing it for more than 3 years now,
I am not great at it,
HECK I am not even good at it!
I have an older brother, also plays guitar,
Better than me in every way possible,
Because he enjoys it, I don't!
A twin sister, a better pianist and singer,
Only because she enjoys it, I don't!
My family hired a guitar teacher, recently
And now it is too much work!
I used to love music,
Before being given this casket I hate to play!
I am just in 7th grade, but this thing comes and ruins my day!
Well, for now, I have this machine of doom,
My only wooden casket with some strings


Age Only Tells Half the Story

Whether looking for a mate 
Or an Employee who won't come in late,
Age only tells half the story.

You are never too old or too young,
If the add cries out for a young gun,
And not a single one replies,
Or if the add asks for an experienced old one,
And not a single one replies,
Then age will have told only half the story,

If you are a looking for a healthy mate,
Age by itself may not indicate,
A healthy state.
And age will have told only half  the story.

If you want experience,
Don't age ring fence,
No offence,
But age will have told only half the story.

Premium Member The Tipping Point of Cosmic Love

Atop each other, these books rest.
For years tried being into only one interest.
Then I began remembering memories I like the best.
Slowly losing my personas I acted as in jest.

On the edge of the cliff of indifference.
Maybe even if I willingly tossed myself over the fence,
I would still have an internalized panic so tense.
But this is all just in my head, no offence.

Higher love comes with higher prices.
Such as leaving behind prejudices and vices.
Sometimes though, we must give into what most entices.
Sometimes I wish I remained as one of your choices.

Still, our fated moments weighed the most on my mind.
You're one of the few I still adore, I find.
I hope through all those years I was just as kind
As all of the times (for me) your soul shined.

Premium Member Fweddy Fweeman

[As the proud owner of a tiny lisp - in which my ‘R’s
sometimes come out a little more like ‘W’s - I think I’m safe to post this?
No offence intended.]
                      ______________

He told her he soon would be leaving the army
“So give us a kiss, cos you’re sending me barmy.”
She said, “What’s your name, then I’ll give you a kiss,”
“I’m Fweddy Fweeman,” he said with a lisp
She gave him a kiss which filled him with glee
He said, “Let us go and sit under that twee.”
They sat in the shade and he said, “You’re so pwitty,
I’ll be old and gway before you, more’s the pity,
so would you go out with an old lisping twooper?”
And she said , “I would because you’re fimply fooper.”

Scattered

Your sentiments regarding myself being scattered
Have brought me to conclude I’m indeed flattered
Too have your attention with reasoning logical
Drawing no offence to wholeness irrevertible 
Still, though wonder how you got there to give such grand advice
And if all to you are scattered from self suburban heights
As I ponder all the past and think of all that mattered
Whilst gazing at the stars which ironically are scattered…

Premium Member Another Stint For Clint

Mr Clint Eastwood, one top dollar guy
Other film makers just watch him and sigh
With back catalogues they can sit back and rest on
Our Clint has released a brand new neo-western

Cry Macho’s the title, I’ve not seen it yet
But it will be ‘wicked’ on that you can bet
My wife said that cowboy is ninety years old
He won’t stampede horses he won’t dig for gold

I told her I don’t know what it’s all about
But Hollywood know how will figure it out
Maybe he’ll shoot folk and watch them all die
And then tell his nurse he can’t remember why

That one time gunslinger, occasional singer
Gets on screen come ons from each passing humdinger
There’s cheroots and liquor, yet what he wants most
A box of viagra… he might need a gross

I mean no offence to that great fellow, Clint
Who gets propositioned by each passing bint
If my ridicule seems a tad over zealous
Don’t worry, Clint… it’s just that I’m jealous!

Premium Member A Faith Worse Than Death

Afghanistan! would anybody give a damn
perhaps had a chance, under Uncle Sam 
They gave them weapons, to fight Talibans
enslavers of women, for pleasures of man

Kabul was thriving, the west brought calm
young ladies attend school, sitting exams
Mullahs hid in exile, with extremist Imams
Allowed back in, by surrendering Afghans

Another failed state, turns hardline Islam 
say they've changed, nah just a big scam
The door was opened, they choose to slam
right back to poverty, from where it began 

Religious fanatics, resume same old sham
beheadings, torturing, cut off some hands
Warped Sharia law, interpretation of Koran 
no A la carte, only one recipe, Allah flambe *

US couldn't stay forever, done all they can 
must watch Russia, China, Nth Korea, Iran
In tragic war situations, there's no exit plan 
want to point a finger, start with bin laden 

* Play on (A la Flambe) no offence intended
to moderate peaceful Muslims*

Afghanistan Poetry Contest
Sponsored by: Kai Michael Neumann
25/08/2021

God Help Us All

Nineteen eighty four was late
Not quite when Orwell said
But slowly and in increments
They are getting in your head

They're trying to change your thinking.
Quite slowly day by day 
Affecting how you view the world
And, controlling what you say

You're not allowed to voice your thoughts
'cause folk might get offended
Even though they are innocent
With no offence intended

This modern world is changing 
Surreptitiously it seems
It won't be long before they start
Policing all our dreams

They'll cart you off and lock you up
It'll be no use complaining
Then put you in room 101
for thought police retraining

God's Covidence

This novel pestilence
From which we have no defence
Or found sure evidence
Of its maleficence
To do such violence
We can't tell the difference
From hoax or sciences
And though I'm not against 
Giving recompence 
To a pitiful audience
That has no common sense
Our leaders take no offence
To insult our intelligence
And lack due diligence 
For based on experience 
They have preference
I don't own a fancy Benz
Or wear dark colored lens
Worth three hundred pence
But in God I have confidence
As I see his providence
I trust his omniscience
And feel his omnipotence
I hide in his omnipresence
And bow to his preeminence
So its not coincidence
I give Him my reverence
I beg for your indulgence
And most kind patience
For in these sentences 
I make no pretense
I hate church absences
For such conveniences
We lose our innocence
To delight in His presence
This is the consequence
Of our disobedience
In this age of affluence 
And techie influence
At home with our decadence
Our reason for existence
Is not to video conference
Sin's awful virulence
Seared our consciences
In this time of turbulence 
May our hearts be his residence
And shine with excellence

Premium Member The Un-United State

Community or Camp
   A line drawn or cast
   Collecting wins or skins
   Savages...

   More civilized than this.





*just one maple leaf flapping in the breeze
  no offence please

What Is Love -

pomegranate days with a twilit moon at night,
never parting ways even when a silly fight-
staying up late and laughing over tea,
for love is everything...he is to me

our racing hearts connected
sweet passion collected
never being neglected
my defects accepted

the center of a universe when sweet adoration is needed,
weak walls fallen down and a strong castle completed-
when i give care, appreciated beyond compare,
always knowing his affection will be there

needs so intense
fever with chills
take no offence
embrace love’s thrills

love is a moment lasted in time,
proven through metered rhythm and rhyme-
i’ve seen much love in my adoring short-lived life,
but no love compares...to being his wife

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

1.12.20
-luloo

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