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Long poem by Laura Breidenthal | Details

To Be A Friend Pleaser

I heavily recall two times when I had made you cry,
Both of which bewildered and moved me
My response was that of disbelief, and regret
And never, upon recalling, 
Have I felt more of the need to address these moments

We were young, certainly, tied together by our imaginations, 
Our wit, and artful talents, 
You, an adept, musically inclined, 
And I musically aroused 
It seemed such a normal day that my guards were broken,
And I freely blabbered, 
As I would to a sibling, or my favorite play thing
We had known each other for a while,
And I deemed it right to show my all
You shared your favorite toys with me, 
And I made it my signature, in my goofy ways, 
To disperse each play session stirring your mind
So that you may laugh, and I may laugh too

I remember the living room, 
Sitting on the light brown carpet floor
And Grandma, for I considered her my grandma too,
Contented on the couch, enjoyed our giggles, and smiled,
While she read her weekly romance novel
I always wondered the reason for her reading,
And how she might receive pleasure in such a simple thing as
Attending to our nonsensical trifles

We played with our stuffed animals,
Hers was a white, fluffy bear with sophisticated clothes
And mine, an alligator, naked, and morose looking
I thought it would stir more laughter if,
In contrast to the kind, gentlemanly bear,
The alligator would respond in grumpy exclamations,
Even insult, if he were pushed too far to conform 
For as the gentlemanly bear insisted upon conversing with the alligator,
Having tea with him and discussing matters of interest, 
The alligator’s response, frank and cold was soon drawled to,
“No, no, no, I do not want to!”
Having repeated such a phrase a couple times,
I saw that it resulted in her laughing,
So, repeating the phrase, 
I meant to conjure more fits of joy,
However, after the third repeat, she suddenly stopped, 
The insistent gentleman was speechless
In a strange pause I stared at my friend,
Watching her pink cheeks pale,
And her eyes water with sudden tears
I squeezed the alligator, almost cursing it instead of myself,
Watching her and wondering what had caused this sadness and pain
She turned away from me, and cried, 
Getting up quickly, embarrassed, and darting into her room

Grandma seemed understanding, 
And this bewildered me even more
Surely, I had done something awful, 
Making my closest friend cry,
And surely, a lecture was soon to put in me in my place
Instead though, she apologized to me, 
And told me not to worry, that she would be just fine
Though never, being the friend pleaser that I was,
Did I feel more awful, and more worrisome
I thought of what I might do to make her feel better,
As Grandma walked down the hall and entered her room
I thought perhaps, she would want me to go home,
So I got up, stuffed my bag with my things,
And waited at the door,
Rehearsing in my mind a thousand apologies

She returned out of the room, 
Saying nothing, but motioning me to the floor with the toys
I obeyed her, never more guarded and thoughtful in my life,
And we resumed our play session
The alligator had took a turn to being quite the sweet chap
And realized that the gentlemanly bear was not as annoying
And bossy as he first thought,
That he only needed a friend to talk to
Someone kind and understanding

The second instance was in a later year
Dear Grandma was away in a separate apartment
Her father was frequently at the house, 
A quiet, but nice man, 
Always retreating to the back room
Whenever we entered the house for lunch or to retrieve a doll
Despite his kindness, his reserve slightly intimidated me,
And the few times he addressed me 
Were always awkward, and thankfully, short
We were more inclined to outside activities those days,
Roleplaying, sporting, and running about,
I the servant and she the princess
I did not much mind the role of the servant, 
As I had many quirks, 
And nothing too great was expected of me
We often, befriended despite our opposite positions,
Would sit at the swing set and converse together
As equals, almost,
The princess gaining from the servant wit and adventure,
And the servant, gaining from the princess,
Patience, poise and simplicity
But our session was long over as I heard the call from her father,
And we both sighed, and ran into the house
My mother had come to pick me up,
And her father, gently, led me to the front door,
With the usual, “See you later!”, 
And, “It was good to see you again!”
My friend, happy in countenance, bid me goodbye,
Smiling, though pale, once again
It did not occur to me at the time,
That she was on the brink of tears
And as I got into the car, 
As we pulled out of the driveway,
I saw the look of sadness and despair on her face
Her eyes… they splashed on me grief
She was staring at me, tears running down her face,
Her body quivering, standing at the curb
I could barely make out from the muffle of the car,
The sound of her crying out,
Just as her father stormed outside, dragging her away,
“Ashly, what the f*** is wrong with you!!!??”
And we drove away, my face plastered to the window,
Thinking to myself, 
“What have I done?”

I was so confused,
So sad, and so strangely angry
To see her father drag her in that way
Though I wondered, perhaps, I had faulted her once more
That in me leaving, she took it as a rejection,
And I felt it my duty to be near her again,
To assure her that I was always her servant
And she was always the princess
I could not, if I wanted to,
Revert to the mindless alligator again,
And, like her father, disregard her enigmatic feelings,
As well as her insistent need for affection and kindness
I vowed I would always provide her with my best
So that only smiles and laughter animated her delicate being

To be a friend pleaser—yes, that is what I am,
Requires more of self, to even enhance oneself, 
To build up the deprived,
To change perspective, 
And change character,
And in turn, serve selflessly,
For to gain the thrill of happiness
From a more than worthy companion,
Is, for me, to gain the world

Copyright © Laura Breidenthal | Year Posted 2015

Long poem by Gerald Dillenbeck | Details

Why BlackWaters Cause BrownFields

If I have this right,
and I almost certainly don't have this Left-Deductively right,
our Environmental Health and Safety Protection Agency
and our Public Health and Safety Education Department
have recently co-invested in BlackWater WinLose EcoPolitical Empowerment
through PublicSector Piracy...

No, honey,
not piracy...
privatization.

Well, yes,
privatization of public-sector cooperative health and safety regeneration
by contracting mercenary pirates of WinWealth for me
or LoseHealth for you.
Robin BlackWater stealing from rich Empire USA cooperative Original PublicSector Constitutional Intent,
to feed the poor starving NonElite military-industrial-educational-financial-insurance Elite BiggestWin for Upper Management and StockOwner Wealth
whether or not this is good for Earth's ecological Regenerative-Cooperative Health and Safety.

Well, when you put piracy in that Robin BlackWater WinElite/LoseNonElite context, it feels appositionally reversed,
like you see piracy as robbing from the entitled rich
to not give out to the lumpenproletariat working-class farmers, 
patriarchal hunters and matriarchal gatherers, 
also bicameral LeftDeductive and RightInductive CoEmpathic Health and Safety Trust DNA-enabled,
but sometimes also concerned about their thin boundaries from conjoining the
even more NonElite LoseLose homeless and hungry.

Yes, well,
that is probably where this image of Robin BlackWater,
stealing from GreenEarth disenfranchised regenerative potential
to give us BrownField-growing cognitive-affective  toxic dissonance
toward ecopolitical rabidity and military-industrial blasted overpopulation
further removed from potential health and safety WinWin cooperative PublicSectors
co-owning and managing polypathic fields 
of co-empathic OriginalIntent endeavor.

My Robin BlackWater iconic images began with wondering why?
Why was BlackWater our obvious international nation-state choice,
whether you reside in the Americas,
or the MiddleEast,
or China,
or Africa,
our choice for subcontracting military-industrial WinLose responses to Piracy,
theft of health and/or wealth from Elite EcoPolitical Corporations, 
both Public and Private, 
Cooperative WinWin EnCultured and Competitive WinLose 
Elite/NonElite 
Patriarchal Fundamentalist Robin BlackWaters
not playing cooperatively-regeneratively nice with
Matriarchal Radical AntiRevolutionaries Loving SlowGrowth (0)-Sum EcoPolitical EcoJustice
Yang/Yin
EgoDeductive/Eco-Inductive Integrity Health and Safety CareFlow, 
Owned and Administered for Left/Right Health and Safety 
Dominating Peace and Internally Equivalent RightBrain Integrative EcoJustice.

Then I realized that BlackWaters,
to create nothing more than new BrownFields
throughout what was MultiCulturing Green/Blue AquarianEarth,
are the logical LoseLose firing line
when LeftBrain would rather DominateOver than DanceWith
RightBrain's cooperative health and safety public/private sector ownership
and management of WinWin co-regenerating 
democratic Elite/NonElite GreenEarth Health and Safety PublicSector constitutions
of humane-divinely nondual co-arising 
Mutual Left/Right Assured Health and Safety Optimization,
rather than more BlackWater WinLose Mutual Piracy Destruction.

This way of seeing BlackWater
as WinLose PrivateSector Piracy Experts
flirts with LeftBrain ElitistDominance of PolyPathic WinWin TruthClaims,
yet is neither intended or accepted
as merely another paranoid conspiracy theory
about the bad old Capitalist PrivateSector Elite
grabbing hard-won exhausted dollars
from the poor little lumpenproletariats,
provoking their fears of themselves becoming terrorized and enslaved homeless and hungry pathetic alcoholics
addicted to RealityShows with WinLose ethically ambiguous,
and therefore smuggly humorous,
emotionally positive-deviant outcomes
so long as our Elder RightBrain remembers to identify
only with the Elite,
and not so much the loser nonelite also ranWin to eventually Lose
rational-enlightening egoLeft/ecoRight-consciousness,
balancing cooperative visibility.

Alright love,
but I do worry about demonizing BlackWater
for so successfully becoming what our WinLose U.S. EcoPolitical Elite
AND cooperative NonElite have supported,
prevailing WinHealth Cooperative Ownership and Upper-Management
as Fully EcoLogical Wealth through LongTerm LowerManagement disinvestment from PreExisting Pathology Expenses.
After all,
isn't that the only way for Elite PrivateSector health and safety corporations to grow further TopHeavy HealthyWealth?
You know what Jesus said,
the rich should get richer
and the poor will inevitably WinLose down to ecosystemic poorer.

Yes, well,
he more likely said
Blessed are the PeaceWaters
for they shall inherit this BlueGreen Aquarian Cooperative Earth.
I would not demonize BlackWaters by becoming my avatar of Global PrivateSector WinLose Piracy
upon NonElite PublicSector cooperative ecopolitical Original Intent.

Perhaps it would help if you could move on from what you don't intend,
to more positively state what you do more regeneratively WinWin intend.

I think we could be more cooperatively WinWin productive
by unveiling how we see our diverse ecopolitical hierarchy,
our health and safety care as WinWin regeneratively optimal
and WinLose degenerative-dissonant piracy, predation by mercenary transfer of WinWin responsibility to WinLose competitive authority structures
with inevitable recycling of degenerating pathological climates
chaotically and often violently erupting LeftBrain competitions
struggling against 
RightBrain bilateral Elite/NonElite CoEmpathic ReGenerative CoMentorship.

Elder RightBrain's Original Health and Safety Protection Cooperative
can only become WinWin owned and contractually LeftRight eco-managed
therapeutically rotating economic/political healthwealth consumer resources
with cooperative (0)-sum production
of global GreenEarth self-regenerative balance--
not so much BlackWater to BrownFields Piracy
of lumpenproletariat co-investors.

Copyright © Gerald Dillenbeck | Year Posted 2017

Long poem by Angela Freeman | Details

Longing for the Stars

My mind is always a million miles away
I long for a better time...I long for a better day
There’s nothing in this life that turns me on
If it weren’t for Mondo, I’d pass and be gone
I have no desire to be here at this time
I feel that God putting me here is a crime 
I feel like a chess piece on his old worn out board 
Why would he do this to me?...my father...my Lord 
What does he get out of seeing me suffer? 
Instead of life getting better, it just keeps getting tougher
Life really stinks, I hate being here 
There’s only one thing here that I hold dear 
Amondo Michael Cole you are the one
You are my moon, you are my sun 
You are the light that makes my darkness disappear 
I just wish that you were near
It is so hard to be away from you
I’m always sad...I’m always blue
The days just keep rolling on
I often wonder when I’ll be gone 
I will leave this place and travel back to Saturn
I will be out in the stars as I watch this place burn 
All of the low life people will melt away 
Leaving you and I to make our way 
Back out into the stars where we belong 
Putting us here was totally wrong
We never belonged here...we’re too good for this place 
If God were here...I’d tell him to his face 
I’d tell him I am angry, but I’m glad I was led to you
Only a loving god would do that for me and that’s true 
So when the hard times get to be too much
I clear my head and think of your touch
God knew he could not get through to me so he sent you
You are real, you are honest, you are good, you are true
You swept me off of my feet with your first letter 
Things just keep getting better and better 
I know you love me more each day
I can feel you and I have to say 
Thank you so much for coming into my life 
I cannot wait to be your wife 
You have made my life complete 
No other can could ever compete 
There’s only you and I forever 
We’ll travel the stars...we’ll leave here together
Never to return...for the stars are our home 
Forever with you...never will I roam 
You are the brightest star that shines in my world 
We are twilight in the netherworld 
We are beautiful as long as we’re together 
For us to shine we need forever 
We can never let the other burn out
There can be no questions and no doubts 
You have to know I love you as much as I do
You have to know my love is true
I also need the same from you
I need the love you had when we flew 
Away to Saturn the first time around 
You picked me up off the ground 
You wrapped me in your big black wings 
You took me on to better things 
Then we got separated and came here 
I was gripped with sadness...I was gripped with fear 
I had no light left inside of me
You shined your light and made me free 
Then the demons came rushing in 
Everything I said and did was full of sin
I was like a demon overnight 
You knew something was wrong...things just weren’t right 
You came to me in a dream 
Your light was on me like a strong beam 
It soaked through me and set me ablaze 
I have never been so filled with light...never been so amazed 
Your love has got me in a daze 
My soul you lifted...my soul you raised 
You brought me out of the darkness where I was residing 
I was tired of dying...I was tired of hiding 
Then I woke up to the madness I created 
I would have been fine had I waited 
To talk to you again to make me see 
This darkness I am in is no way to be
You need to force me into the light with you
I want to be done with these demons...I want to be through 
I don’t know what else to do
I need you to pull me through with your love that’s true 
They say true love conquers all 
Don’t let me slip...don’t let me fall 
The abyss is constantly calling my name
I am living with regrets...I am living in shame 
Then you came along and, my soul, you tried to claim 
You perfected your shot and your arrow you aimed 
At my heart and pulled me back to you again 
One day we’ll get over...one day we’ll win 
These demons are not going to take me from you
I don’t care what I have to do
I have searched my whole life for a love that’s true 
And that love, my love, comes from you
Yes, my love, you will take me back to the stars 
You’ll take away all of my pain and heal all my scars 
For to the stars we must return
There’s nothing left here for me to learn 
I found you, my love...my shining star 
And for you, with God, I’d go to war 
There’s no limit to my love...I want more 
You are the one that I adore 
You came to me when I was damaged goods 
I talked to you and you understood 
No one has ever gotten me before 
They always run and shut the door 
You opened your door and your heart wide open to me
It is only with you that I can be free 
We have a short while left on this earth, my dear 
After that everything will be made quite clear 
We’ll understand what all this meant 
We’ll understand how we were heaven sent 
We fell together and lost each other 
No one else can give us what we need...we’d never recover 
We need each other’s love to continue to grow 
It is not for other beings to understand or know 
We are different you and I
My reason for being here...I now know why
I was to find you before I die
When the time comes for me to fly 
You will see me passing by
Telling you how much I love you and I’ll wait for you 
You will fly over and meet me...this is true 
If only other people knew 
What it’s like for me and you
No one has a love like ours
We belong together in the stars 
Here we go, baby, take my hand 
We’re out in space on demand 
We fly away to Saturn so fantastic 
She’s so beautiful and so majestic 
To the stars, baby, light the way 
Never to return to earth another day 
We are on to bigger and better things 
No one could picture this in their dreams 
The site is so magical and amazing 
No more hoping...no more gazing 
Out in the stars we’ll forever be together as one 
With a love much brighter than the sun 
We’ll shine our light on each other as we pass Mars 
Here we go...back to the stars 

Copyright © Angela Freeman | Year Posted 2017

Long poem by Mark Martin | Details

Brave new world

(based on Aldous Huxley's book "Brave New World")

Human hatchery

Clink clink clink clink...
Test tubes prattling past
along the chrome plated production line.
Glistening under fake fluorescence
humming in harmony
with the magnetic motors
of conveyors, centrifuges and camshafts.
Biological blobs of gamete goo,
vials of vile biology,
a tempest of sperm and ova,
neatly confined to a pyrex womb.
Organised, sanitised, harmonised.
Fordist fertilisation.
All equal under Ford.

Or at least until your fate and fortune 
are forced and fixed at forty metres.
Not nature (abhorrent), 
not nurture (disgusting),
not what you know,
not who you know,
but the viability of your cell.
Destiny by DNA.
What will you be?
An Alpha Aryan?
A Gamma gopher?
A mass produced Epsilon?
Will you be genetically enhanced?
Or poisoned and asphyxiated?

Perhaps you'll be discarded
as excess bio-matter
by the second trimester
at ninety metres?

Or survive to be hatched
at one fifty metres?
Neatly sown along furrows
of sterile steel cots.
Rows and columns,
ranks and files,
levels and floors
of battery babies.
Chemically conditioned,
weaned on sleep whispering,
embracing their place in a perfect society.
United by soma!
(a gram is better than a damn)
Disease designed away!
All praise Ford!
Everyone is happy!

But nothing is perfect.
Bernard is cursed.
Excess embryonic alcohol
injected at one twenty metres.
Someone wasn't paying attention.
Industrial accident.
Disruptive misfit.
Unhappiness.

Beta's hypnopedic haikus

Alphas lead the way
Grey matter, grey uniform
Alphas rule wisely

Betas work less hard
Mulberry clad skilled workers
Glad I'm a Beta

Gammas are stupid
Wearing green! Ugly as trees!
Ignore the Gammas

Deltas are dummies
Khaki clones, oxygen starved
Bokanovsky batch

Epsilon primates
Brutish, black robed underclass
Disposable drones

John's suicide soliloquy

To be or not to be?
I cannot be.
So I decide not to be.

How can I be noble and suffer
the slings and arrows of outrageous fortune
when the arrows have been broken
and the slings put aside
by this ugly utopia?

Should I shuffle off this mortal coil
and enter the eternal sleep
perchance to dream without soma?
Will I enter paradise
paid for many fold
with barb wire and thorns,
with torments and trials,
with utter utter heartbreaking longing?
What sense does this make
when paradise lies at my feet
that I've not suffered enough to deserve?

How can I earn the love
of the woman I love
when she gives her love so freely
to myself and others who scantly earn
the meerest slither of her golden fruit?
Love so sweet to the lips
but diluted by banality and promiscuity
to the tasteless sterility of boiled water.
Yet I still yearn.

And when I attain my unimagined dream
I reject her with anger 
and sow the seeds of confusion
in her innocent eyes
and watch the weeds of fear
choke her very essence.
What demons have hatched from my soul?
What has this world manufactured in my heart?

And so I seek solace in solitude.
A lonely lighthouse keeper
in a stormless sea of soma civilisation.
Absolution with abject poverty,
the stings of self flagellation
barely noticed against my rented heart.
The madness of mixed up mantras.

Yet retribution comes from a hornet's nest
of helicopters carrying the inane.
Spectators of the spectacle.
Curious about the curiosity.
Fascination with the forbidden.
Cultures sparking across electrodes.
Moths drawn to taboo's acetylene flame.
I curse them! I curse them all!

I was born savage, then made savage.
Marooned on Prospero's isle
by insanity's tempest.
I can brew and boil 
and billow and burn
and cast down purifying bolts against the outside world.
One asylum to another.
Never knowing peace.
O brave new world, that has such people in it.
But this world is not for me.



Notes:

BNW society is divided into five major classes. From highest to lowest: alpha, beta, gamma, delta, epsilon

Original BNW quote - sleep conditioning for Betas - "Alpha children wear grey. They work much harder than we do, because they're so frightfully clever. I'm really awfully glad I'm a Beta, because I don't work so hard. And then we are much better than the Gammas and Deltas. Gammas are stupid. They all wear green, and Delta children wear khaki. Oh no, I don't want to play with Delta children. And Epsilons are still worse. They're too stupid to be able to read or write. Besides they wear black, which is such a beastly colour. I'm so glad I'm a Beta."

Bokanovsky is a fictional process of human cloning - https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bokanovsky%27s_Process

Hypnopedia is the process of sleep learning - https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sleep-learning

Gametes are cells used in reproduction (sperm and ova) - https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Gamete

Soma is a drug mass produced by the BNW government - citizens are sleep conditioned to become addicted

"a gram is better than a damn" is a BNW mantra used by its citizens to encourage non-conformists (i.e. are unhappy) to take soma

John was a savage rescued from a reservation by Bernard Marx for his own political agenda. 

Bernard Marx was a physically and mentally imperfect Alpha misfit reportedly caused by excess alcohol injected into his embryo during his hatching.

John's soliloquy is a parody of Shakespeare's "to be or not to be" soliloquy from Hamlet. Since John learnt to read from an old copy of Shakespeare's works, this seemed appropriate.

In BNW, Henry Ford is revered as a god - the Christian cross is replaced with a T (as in the model T Ford, an early affordable mass produced car).



Written 10th April 2017
Entry to "brave new world" contest

Copyright © Mark Martin | Year Posted 2017

Long poem by Laura Breidenthal | Details

Light On the Devil's Chord - Day 22

The great Sabbath day descended, though not in my heart and mind
On this new day,
I imagined rays of God’s light shining generously upon the mountains,
Pools of living waters gurgling, and winds gently rustling trees
Wishing for the simple to come rescue me from this troublesome pit
The demons watching me from afar,
Talking amongst themselves in low tones and whispers

 The dark is temporary,
And the light is everlasting . . . 

How could such hate emanating from his very pores, 
Transform, translate into this burning need for me?
Did he truly love me?
Is his heart capable of such a thing?
Or was he lying, playing deceiving chords on my weakening heart,
Was he desperately searching for a way inside?
And had he succeeded in the search,
Reaching inside to the core of me, grabbing on, holding me firmly?

“Your Lamb, dear light, sacrificed for sin,
What need does He have of you now?
Light permeates through you, in you,
What desire do you have for joys so long felt?
For eyes having seen the most glorious majesties, 
Overcoming every trial, every glorious plight
Have you no need for the precious tears you have once shed
For me, in me?”

He spoke from behind, a soft, low tone only slightly louder than the demons
I sat upon the balcony on my knees, fighting for the Spirit to thrive 
As he crouched nearer to my ears, the force of his song weighing me down

“You used to be so in love with those impenetrable sorrows,
How they rippled through your skin, 
Throbbing through your entire body
You embellished in my hate, 
You ravaged my night with your hope for needed light
I never needed you in that moment in time,
The weak human that you were,
Trapped in my weaving rainclouds,
Lost in sin’s oblivion, and stuck in pain’s posture
Just as I need you now, oh spirit, oh teacher of light,
Why must you now turn your back to me?
How are we to sing together in harmonies you dream of,
When your heart cannot fathom the prosperity of our promising union?
Have you no faith in me?
No trust in me, to realize I may change?
If I were to show you change, 
Would you then stay with me?
Do not shutter, woman, beautiful spirit, mighty majesty,
Do not tremble at my tempt, my offer, my plea,
Rest assured, your hope of me
Leads my miserable mind to a foreign path,
A path more exhilarating, but less clear
Though disobedient in nature, my love for your potentials are foreseeable
Attainable, and I daresay agreeable
If I may solo in song all my days,
I will be miserable in the possibility of so many duets we could have shared,
Torturing me with the dark truth that I can never turn to a lie—
That you are indeed my own, and you have me,
That I have fallen in love with a distant light that I almost wish to be
But you pull away, 
And refuse me! 
Because I worship your fire,
And I see what you can be,
You crucify me!
You jab nails in my wings, 
You call for me to shove me backwards
Your long silences make way for my speeches,
That you listen to and grimace upon
What if we were to be equals?
What if we were to be masters?
Foul and fruitful, 
Dark and candid, 
Why not let me be taught?
Tell me why not! 
Your God would not soon cast you away the moment you choose this way,
Is that what you fear?
See how His condemnations haven’t killed me, but strengthened me!
I may be mad, but I am genuine, real and yours if you will have me
Fierce, resilient and right are the rebellious!
Artistically, mightily and beautifully we suffer!
I promise you pain,
I promise you immense sorrow,
But I promise you freedom,
In it I promise you distain, anger and war
But these things do not come for naught,
There is something hot and ready to fight for! 
If not to sacrifice for eternal light,
Why not sacrifice for our love?
And do not tell me you do not love me,
Or cannot love me
Do not tell me with your signature nobility
That you wish me to be saved and free
Do not tell me to get behind you,
Like an angry Lamb near to the slaughter!
I refuse, yes I refuse
To envy you from afar…”

His voice grew intense as he circled round and in front of me
His eyes were focused strongly on me,
Determined and confidently he sang,

“I will not lead you to death and destruction dear soul,
You will lead me to what I was meant to be,
And I you!
Do you believe you have come here for nothing?
Has the demon spoken to you, warning you of my seductions?
Crushing you with pleas for redemption,
Did she, the wretched demon, give you hope for me?
Do you wish to rise with me,
Or die in eternal life?
Without me,
As the beautiful, unattainable solo widow,
The lonely perfection?”

I turned my face away,
Painfully speechless, 
My heart beating violently like days of old

“I hear your heart wildly,
Cease this grieving for me!
Celebrate, be joyous—does not your Spirit give you this? 
Sing with me, at least sing with me!
Before the last days hurl over us, through us, and past us.”

I opened my mouth to sing, 
But nothing would come out
I became lost in his abyssal eyes, 
And contrary to what I believed
I saw change there,
I saw that he no longer hated me,
That he really did love me

“You see it in me, 
But you grieve it, I know. . . 
You were once a daughter of Eve, 
But now you are a separate spirit of truth
So sing me your truth, and I will sing you mine…”

March 26, 2016

Copyright © Laura Breidenthal | Year Posted 2016

Long poem by Brendan J. Simons | Details

The Mask of Alabaster

Once the night had fell upon a sleepless slumber,
Whence the winter woke me when the third was three in number.

I sense that a wince doth lurk and wear which wicked gaze,
Of conniving shadows cast between my bedroom windowpanes.

I try to sit up from the fluff of foul feathered pillows of goose,
Yet they hold me down as if they'd grown on my neck to form a noose.

Shadows are simple reverse reflections of what's been left behind
A thing when sight can see what light has yet to hit the mind.

They pirouette as silhouettes upon my wall and in my eyes,
In which I sense with worry why I'm frozen and feeling tied.

As I'm laying locked in horror I look through the window’s diaphanous glass, 
And see that in a tree there floats a fluorescent face in a mist of brass.

It floats aloft the frost of the frigid Winter floor, 
Stirring cirrus shadow limbs of the moonlit sycamore.

An incandescent twilight cloak, illumes the timber's lattice, 
Where shines this cryptic spectral glow akin the ignis fatuus.

Abrupt by insanity as I fancy this fantasy, surely born by a brief hallucination; 
Optic inventions craft in confusion surely conjured such nonce observation.

A peculiar perched mask seems to hang disguised within the wintry thicket, 
“An illusion,” I suspect “my percipience deceived, by a dubious false exhibit.”

Two holes are dug beneath rubbed bone, bleached white in wan complexion, 
Masquerading to mock the missing paired two eyes of aesthetic perfection.

“Indeed,” I thought, “These staring beams appear as do a pair of eyes,” 
I try and descry the light from which they shine under a gleaming guise.

Purloined I’m poised in a lucid melt, tasting a poisonous pure oppression, 
Wrought by this face that haunts my view through the lens of my fenestration.

Shifting my view to find fault in my faculty,
I sought salvage in sight of such psychic insanity.

My fidgeting efforts prove futile, the carven masked eyes fix upon mine still! 
Incessantly I’m stunned in speculum, boiling in a benumbing brisk of thrill.

Alas, my eyesight: no longer the sole sense of this deville, 
What once was mere vision hails now my ears with a trill.


My breath and pulse waxing slower, and waning ever faster, 
Aghast by celestial sounds from a susurrating mask of plaster.

Whence from my vision avowed, to the vacillations I succumb, 
Of undulations the mask strums, moving inside my eardrums.

Who brings to me this apparition, arisen from perhaps an adumbration,
Of a visit from he whose grim reaping, lends to the living certain cessation?

And then in reminiscence, to my mind arrived the anamnesis,
Of the shelf that shelters a book one might otherwise dismiss.

Within its parchment pages, whence in refuge resides a clue, 
To what this mask is made of; when, where, and why; by who?

Pins prick from prior paralysis, upon my dermis disguise of bone,
I shiver and grab the book and beg, bound reason to me be shone.

Within this covered lexicon read acrylic words in arcane diction, 
Which most readers would anthologize, as ancient artifact and fiction.

The first supposition tis true, that this book was bound in the archaic ages, 
Amiss the latter assumption that fable unfolds by the turning of its pages.

In my desperation I stir commotion, reading over every turned folio, 
Longing for light in yonder window break, as did Shakespeare’s Romeo.

Yet each passage read of occult sorcery, or a variety of mages, 
No line of a white mask, appeared to me on any of these pages.

All hope seemed to escape with passing page, turned by my flustered fingers, 
Then a sudden zephyr blown ingress to the page on which now I linger.

On the bottom right reads in numeral: “Nine-hundred and ninety-nine,” 
On which reads the magical recounted chronicle of myth upon its line.

The fluorescence of the pallid mask that posts upon the tree, 
Shares the ashen-sheen on a face seen afore, on this page by me.

An oblong oil-painted portrait, white and blush of reddish-pink, 
Its caption reads: “The Mask of Alabaster,” inscribed in faded ink.

To the left of the ghostly image reads a paragraph like a spell, 
A warning of dark wizardry, which concocts white masks in hell:

"Animated by a wizard whose avarice bears blithe the thaumaturgy, 
To forge a warlock’s soul inside a gypsum stone, 
This augury and the legerdemain required of such magical metallurgy,
Siphons a sapphire from the fire inside his pelvic bone.

His soul is trapped in a putrid shell: his very own decapitate skull,
On which will gleam a glowing garnet, glimmering gold and scarlet,
His eyes shall cry with weeping, sunken, hollow two eyeholes
Luring any victim to view the red of this lustrous target."

Such dread and morbidity of a lost soul; ‘tis most tragic, 
When trapped in a mask made by evil mischievous magic.

What malice must succeed from such a tumorous terror? 
And what reconnaissance be sought by its hidden wearer?

Returning my gaze to the wraith in the window,
I remember that it has my mind muddled in limbo.

This mask of cadaverous complexion, 
To my horror, mine own reflection.

Copyright © Brendan J. Simons | Year Posted 2017

Long poem by JW Earnings | Details

Liquor of Lament: My Phase of Craze

/^Inspired by "Someone Else" by Miley Cyrus, "All of Me" by John Legend and many other awesome songs^\

(Spoken) 
Hold me close
Stop pretending that I'm not aware of what's happening 
Anything goes
So, quit trying to be someone that you're not...it's not working...I know the truth can be frightening 
I'm sorry that we went our separate ways...oh, our own separate ways 
Now, I'm gulping up liquor of lament 
Liquor, liquor, liquor of lament
For a while, I felt as if I was turning into someone else
For the longest time, I didn't have a voice like everyone else 
Now, I've found it at last
But, you've gone away...alas...

Verse 1: Every tomorrow is another day to shine on 
Every yesterday is a promise to move on
I made some wrong turns here and there 
When we were young, we had squandered our passions and despair that whips us bear
You know, things are better unsaid 
Drifting away and drowning in my dread
My head is spinning, I can't bring my thoughts to bed
I was foolishly in love with the wrong kind of sentiment...
Where has the time gone? Why did you put up our one-of-a-kind love for rent?
I thought you were sent from heaven to get me out of this hell on Earth
I thought you were the angel of light that will grant me miracles of mirth

Pre-chorus: You smoked me like a cigarette 
You were drinking away your regret
Your sympathy is what I crave...you're my fave 
This amazing love is above sex
I promise you that I will remain brave...
I gave you all of me and I embrace you...xoxo...oxox...
I Worship The Moments Between Us
We Are On The Same Rowdy Bus 

Chorus: I've been led astray the moment I said that I didn't need your protection 
I've been lying to myself, saying that I can live without your affection
I've been drunk off of the liquor of lament
The bitter liquor, liquor, liquor of lament 
I am sheltered by His tent if only I repent 
Smoke smothers my mouth...
Don't take the words I say personal...
My tongue is on your pole 
I've lost my direction - am I going north or south?
I didn't mean to mouth you off...my anger took its toll and I should've gave it my all
You are still on my mind through it all
Through it all
Feeling like I'm falling in love with this loneliness inside of me
Feeling like I'm failing to meet the finish line...not that vibrant honestly 

Verse 2: On cloud nine, feeling fine
You were everything to me, my abode and ecstasy
Overdosing on the drug of mine
You were my friend and foe, but now you're my best friend with benefits, baby 
The meth of death is on your breath...
It sickens me to the core
What more can I say?
My heart grows absolutely sore
I haven't realized that I fell prey to your mess of misery this wretched day
Longing to be free from your captivity
High off of my bittersweet bipolar, emotional junk piling in my mind 
I drank a shot of your shame all because I acted so immature, baby
I'll explain later about this desolate dilemma, letting time unwind 

{pre-chorus}
{chorus}

Verse 3: Disappointed...ashamed of what I've done 
The darkness that grows like cancer in me has won
Brainwashed by the temporary natural highs I feel so strongly
In vain, I sip in your delicious desires that are on fire constantly 
I was born to be fighter with all my might 
Things appear to go wrong all along tonight
You shouldn't have told me that I was crying tears of fears 
Because I wiped them away years ago...
Who cares what happened back then 
The memories escape me like a running pack of deers 
Who knew you'd hurt me like this again...don't leave me again...

{pre-chorus}
{chorus}

Verse 4: It's best to keep secrets than to expose them by gossiping mindlessly 
Are you truly dedicated to me? What I see before me is nothing but an act of misery and reverie
Is it a possibility that you're the right one for me?
You watched me during my phase of craze 
You gave me praise when I didn't deserve it...
You're the stars in the midnight sky that I gaze upon...I graze in my maze of one-of-those-days

{pre-chorus x2} 
You smoked me like a cigarette 
You were drinking away your regret
Your sympathy is what I crave...you're my fave 
This amazing love is above sex
I promise you that I will remain brave...
I gave you all of me and I embrace you...xoxo...oxox...
I Worship The Moments Between Us
We Are On The Same Rowdy Bus

{chorus}

Verse 5: You are the sunlight in the reflection of the ecstatic sea
Douse me with your delight that brought me back to serenity 
I am gonna refuse that drink
Instead, I'll sit and think
I was about to sink in my pangs of pain 
Then, thank the Lord of Accord for your healing rain that doesn't drive me insane
I was driving on the lamentable lane
When I drank that liquor of lament
I was looked at as someone insane 
I don't know where my happiness went 
There's plenty of time for you and I to dance the night away
I want to be good to you, my dearest love...my angel of sun-shining day 

{pre-chorus}
{chorus}

Copyright © JW Earnings | Year Posted 2015

Long poem by Nii-Ayi Solomon | Details

My First Love Experience

It was in the early days of our lives
We met
She was so beautiful 
My eyes could not stop admiring
My heart kept racing 
Every time it sensed
her good-looking approaching
But we were too young 
To give full meaning 
To the love language

Years passed
Time kept flying
We lost contact 
But the memory of our past
We lugged with us

Someway, somehow,
Fate found us
And brought us together

We have now grown 
So big and sweet
We both glitter
At each other’s presence
We were ready to do a recap 
of where we left off

We laughed and joked about our past
We talked about our hey days at the National Theatre
We remembered the beautiful past that reflects our true self
We both haven’t changed after all

At that moment my heart spoke 
The love language again
I knew I was in love with her
It wasn’t today
It started from when we were kids

Man must gather confidence
And speak out his feelings

Thoughts,
Thoughts of what she would say;

Don’t laugh at me,
We all do it sometimes


We were sweet friends
But now, I want to take 
The friendship a step further

My heart in full swing 
Of abnormal beating,
It beat faster
It spoke two different languages
Say it; and keep it
Don’t know which of these to believe 
I was shy
I was afraid
I was confused
I was happy
I was sad
I felt insane

There she was,
Standing in front me
In their house 
Beaming with smiles

Nii, she said tenderly,
‘I thought you said you had something to tell me,
Come on, I can’t wait any longer
My ears are itching’

My heart just jumped out
And now I want to escape from her presence
I wish I could vanish into thin air

Stop laughing at me
I’m not mouth lazy

I was just afraid of the outcome 
What if she said NO?
What if I lose her as a friend?
What if she vanishes into thin air?

And the what if’s continued …

Once in a man’s life time
He must draw together courage
To speak out his feelings

After all, I would not have violated any law
For telling a sweet scented woman 
Gorgeous, attractive and stunning 
About what I feel for her
So my nerves were clamed

This was how I started…

Esther, I mean, Naa Adjeley

The confusion has started

Errrmmm, you see,

Still didn’t know what to say

Hmmm, hope you are doing great?

Still confused…

‘I guess your brother, Thomas,
Is doing fine?’

She stared at me intently 
The smiles on her face kept 
My hopes alive 
And my heart awake 
I knew she was expecting 
Something more than making those comical remarks

It’s was now time to speak

Naa Adjeley, I travelled from Cape Coast 
To Accra to come see you
To tell you I miss you
and errmmm…

Please let it out
The small voice inside me whispered

I left campus to Accra just to let you know that
I AM IN LOVE WITH YOU

She laughed aloud and said
‘’are you serious!’’

‘Oh! Yes I am’
I said confidently,

Her face suddenly darkened
The smiles misplaced 
I wanted to fade away from her presence
After all I’ve let my feelings out
That was what mattered to me
But I did not have that special magic



How long have you felt this way towards me?
The next question to answer
‘When we were kids,
But it was revamped quite recently’
I replied

I could see the confusion on her face
She needed some more time 
To think things through
I was excited let it out
But she was confused

Days passed,
I went back to school,
We enjoyed chit chatting on the phone
But the answer to my request was still hanging

She mentioned in one of our conversations
She might be travelling
But didn’t say when
She was a nursing student
I was a tourism student
The beauty of having a friend 
You know and love
kept my mind awake in school

School was on recess
I arrived in Accra
Left my things unpacked
Borrowed money from my old girl
Picked a cab to Banana Inn
To see the woman 
That has taken my heart hostage

I kept bagging at their gate
Agoo! agoo! agooo! 

Waiting in anticipation to see
Her fine looking face
And present her with my first gift
Her brother, Thomas opened up

‘Hey! Where have you been?
It’s been a while’
Was the first question 
He asked

The only interest I had was to see her face
I wanted to see the woman 
That makes my heart beat
She was all I cared about

Where is Naa Adjeley?
I enquired from Thomas

I saw the shock on his face
My breathe was not catching up 
with me properly
I knew something was wrong

‘Where is she’,
I asked again
‘Didn’t she tell you
She was travelling?’
My face dropped dead at once
I felt a sharp heart ache
I almost fainted

She left for the U.K
Without even saying bye bye
Was that why, she didn’t give any reply
to my proposal?
Why did she keep my heart awake?

I left her house, depressed
Her gift was a bonus for the cab driver
My face drenched in pool of tears

I know it hurts
But I felt more relieved

Why?

My feelings had been made lucid to her
I now walk with my chest out
Ready to move on
Ready to open myself up to happiness

I still remember
Her looks
Her smiles
Her beauty
Her mannerism

My first love story
The one I have kept furtive
Over the years

Naa Adjeley
My old time love.

Copyright © Nii-Ayi Solomon | Year Posted 2012

Long poem by Ir0nic ZiNk | Details

The Question

True love is unquestionable. 
What is true love?
To me; it is more feeling based rather than definitively worded. 
Emotional attached, formed mentalities that are equally paired with an immaculate physical connection. 
Collected bi-gender, shared love—
She’s out there.
He may be too afraid. 
Hidden in there; inside of this—
What is that?
Pedestal lifted impression that one is more of ______ than…
What am I getting at?
Insecurities canker like goose-bumps on apparent tips—
My knotted tongue wishes—
Tied up; zipped shut as if forcefully so. 
Never allowing such realistic possibility that she would ever… 
Unable to move, made sloth.
Watch her eyes glow.
Somehow in-allowed to connect; looking foolish from. 
I bet she isn’t that surreal. 
Maybe even thinks about him?
Not me though. 
He is surely not I. 
For I—
For I am not worthy; me…
Who am I?
A nobody, a loser, I don’t stand a chance with…
AH-Duh-Stutter-Red-Face—
Butterflies ideated coincidentally as fear—
Aged advice isn’t as easy as said.
But done—
Her image becomes glorified; extensions ladder the space between. 
Imaginary perception instilled through conceptualized normalcy. 
That is—
Now and later remains currently accepted as reality.
Immaturity isn’t anything.
Maturity isn’t contextually different. 
Nature is conceived as the ground; associated with the sky.
Nonchalantly accepted; unquestionable…
Man and woman are every-bit; natural. 
Misunderstand man; while miss opportunity slips away. 
Fewer complexes than one foolish boy wonder comprehends.
Angered shouts’ discourage; helped only by belief.
Over thought of everyone else left little room for personality.
Idiotic ignorant youngster; old man self says…
Courage can be found in the outcast. 
Just by saying how it is. 
I don’t appreciate that. 
This goes for pretty much everything; really. 
Cool is the cat who allows natural acts. 
Being who you are—
Nice…
Is it that difficult to be kind?
It is kind-of difficult to be that.
Parental digressions advise children; blindly. 
Kids talk with the textured walls scent into their rooms. 
Then they count from one, two, and three.
Nothing happens after three… 
I would consider exploring four more numbers. 
Limited lessons teach liars who to cheat. 
Stolen from truth; role models act as if. 
Confused conditions are figured out. 
Control is bestowed within double-standards. 
Seldom do they take this to extremes. 
Carrying this behavior into adulthood; delusional morality—
Sociopathic enlargements build unrealistic illusions. 
Real life illusions; becoming reality—
Handpicked inner circular societies rally as troops. 
Every so often one member wises up.
Calling out this moral deficiency; sanity loses color. 
Spit and foam back-fire from out of nowhere. 
Only to be looked upon from another time as expected behaviors.
Pity isn’t justifiably explained. 
However present pity may be; this takes on more relevance. 
Massively strikes a low blow to society. 
Entirely breaking interpreted innocence in general—
Skeptical now of other people’s intentions; walls form.
Barriers blockade available trust almost impenetrable. 
Knowledge creeps slowly though, over many passing years. (flip-flop)
Perhaps it may possibly be deathly withheld, inside lesser lives. 
Fortunate few will open otherwise closed minds just wide enough; allowing forth-righted passages. 
Fewer so are those select few ambitious to remain bungled-up; bollixing on the brink of sanity. 
Horrified bi humanity, dry vomitus thrusts heave in disgust. 
Neither good nor bad, is this reaction simply. 
It simply just is.
Recognition allows sun breaks to reveal hope. 
Appreciation is graciously true. 
Unmasked by pure consciousness; an option is chosen. 
To be or not to be? 
I believe that has been questioned. 
One decides to be and not to become whatever (this is that) they are. 
Bravely taken stances must lead.
Odds against all this good, hatred and painful laughter pings. (Ping…….)
Tears eventually form; a man is all.
(A)	Man is all… 
Cyclically repeated by one imbecile concoction; empower numerate will and you shall ideologically ingest accordingly so to be comprehensively aware; craziness. 
Always believable through optimism, a little less romantic hope more expressing gratitude. 
Equality based judge-mentality towards all mankind. 
Making mistakes; acknowledging apologetically. 
Example displayed by actions effectively lead confided by word got your back. 
Sleeping sounds snore in a comfortable bed. 
Anxiously awaken by a beautiful, surreal recollection. 
A once fearfully lifted atop pedestal; now he looks into level eyes.
The butterflies remain…
Overjoyed by this, love finds truth through honest acts. 
Lips lock to seal serenity. 
Everlasting love will immortally guide tomorrow. 
Only by showing the way to today.     

-Ironic Zinc
May 14, 2016 (edited on, forgotten and found in folder dated 10-22-15)

Copyright © Ir0nic ZiNk | Year Posted 2016

Long poem by JW Earnings | Details

Throw the Blame on Me

Giving in to the silence one last time,
Everyone needs encouragement once in a while
Some need it everyday
For God’s sake, hear me out during this time of suffering
You're different from everyone else
It's not your fault x2
It's okay to be unique as long as you get along with your friends and enemies
Don't you feel comfortable with your group of friends?
You don't have to run away from the truth... 
Unless your bound to hear those heartless, malicious lies

Why don’t you
Throw the blame on me? 
Why don’t you
Unchain me free? Can you do that for me?
Can you do that to earn 
A ticket to freedom?
Can you heal this burn
That makes me feel numb and dumb?
Why don’t you
Throw the blame on me?
If it makes you feel better,
You can go ahead and ignore my plea
Throw the blame on me x3
Throw the b-blame on m-me

I’m the only one, feeling down in the gutters
I sponge in everyone’s emotions and it crashes into me
It seeps through me like the cool atmosphere
Sending me shivers down my spine, giving me mere fear
I don't know what you're thinking or making up in your silly, little mind
Are you planning on doing revenge? 

Why don’t you
Throw the blame on me? 
Why don’t you
Unchain me free? Can you do that for me?
Can you do that to earn 
A ticket to freedom?
Can you heal this burn
That makes me feel numb and dumb?
Why don’t you
Throw the blame on me?
If it makes you feel better,
You can go ahead and ignore my plea
Throw the blame on me x3
Throw the b-blame on m-me
Throw the blame on others, but YOU are not innocent 
If only you'd repent... Now you're faith is put on sale
Blame it on me, you pathetic jerkasaurus! I sting like a sinister serpent 
You're the "hero that won everone's heart" - you're a flippin' fail!!

I see that you're cornered by anger
I saw you almost falling off the edge
I smell your fury like a wildfire !! !!
But, I know that I might bring you some light...when the day embraces the night
You're different...now that's no lie...you never leave my sight
You never leave my sight
You are cotton candy, melting in my mouth with utter delight 
Why do I have to wave goodbye to our love when it's just the beginning? 
Maybe our time is tight! Alright...
Everything's black and white now! 
Give me your full attention somehow!

Why don’t you
Throw the blame on me? 
Why don’t you
Unchain me free? Can you do that for me?
Can you do that to earn 
A ticket to freedom?
Can you heal this burn
That makes me feel numb and dumb?
Why don’t you
Throw the blame on me?
If it makes you feel better,
You can go ahead and ignore my plea
Throw the blame on me 
Do you have proof, you act like a stubborn fool that used the wrong tool 
Why are you so extremely... Cruel??
You aren't cool - you're fire from hell
Where does your heart dwell? You make my heart go pell-mell!! 
Don't even try to put all the b-blame on m-me
You nearly killed me with your malicious envy!! 

Why did everything result in my breaking point?
My fragile, yet sturdy bones are out of joint 
I wanna share with you my divine flight
Reach for the sunlit sky with the peace-abiding angels
Fly like a herd of elegant birds
Hear me out - I can't meet to your high standards 

Why don’t you
Throw the blame on me? 
Why don’t you
Unchain me free? Can you do that for me?
Can you do that to earn 
A ticket to freedom?
Can you heal this burn
That makes me feel numb and dumb?
Why don’t you
Throw the blame on me?
If it makes you feel better,
You can go ahead and ignore my plea
Throw the blame on me x3
Throw the b-blame on m-me

This hardhearted love never warmed me up in the first place
I never want to see your face in the streets again…

Why don’t you
Throw the blame on me? 
Why don’t you
Unchain me free? Can you do that for me?
Can you do that to earn 
A ticket to freedom?
Can you heal this burn
That makes me feel numb and dumb?
Why don’t you
Throw the blame on me?
If it makes you feel better,
You can go ahead and ignore my plea
Throw the blame on me x3
Throw the b-blame on m-me
If it makes you feel better,
You can walk away from my sight and leave me be
I'll never look back at your shadows... Reflections
Why do I feel like you abandon me like a long, lost puppy - I hate having to deal with rejections
I've been handed the wrong directions

I never want to see your face in the streets again…

You left me without a trace
You left me alone in an empty room all day and you didn't have any pity of my soul - sorry to be blunt, but it's the bothering truth you must learn to accept - you must pay the price
You never gave me a piece of your grace
If it makes you feel better,
You can go ahead and ignore my plea
Though my heart would give in to the gloom of today and you didn't even bother to actually take my little advice and I'm, once again, your living sacrifice
Break the silence and greet me with a promising smile

Copyright © JW Earnings | Year Posted 2014

Long Poems