Teacher Funny Poems | Examples
These Teacher Funny poems are examples of Funny poems about Teacher. These are the best examples of Funny Teacher poems written by international poets.
My teacher who thought sun-bathing made her well-red,
graded me average, she was mean to the power hundred.
She was once a banker, but after some time lost interest,
wanted to be a pilot, so her career could take off for the best.
She thought to be able to fly high, could be truly uplifting,
instead she bought a boat, for in the sea it was for sail drifting.
She was an optimist, her blood type was B-positive, they stated,
but the doctor said it was Type-O, the mistake was corrected.
Her memory was photographic, but she couldn’t fully develop it,
she needed to alter a brain part, changed her mind the last minute.
When she stole neighbor’s lamps, he couldn’t be more de-lighted,
a picturesque girl, she landed in jail, “I was framed”, she asserted.
“Uncle Celery, Uncle Celery, is chopping all those veggies,”
my impish nieces and nephew who copycat my voice,
and other hand gestures or mannerisms known to me and others,
how they used to ape that voice of mine with their American twang,
“Celery, do you love us for real, will you be our teacher when we’re grown,”
I, Howard, replied that it would be a delightful honour,
“Celery, are you having a fun time with us at all,”
I answered; “every day is a fun day when we’re together,”
one relative blushed: “never mind the mushy stuff, never mind the mush,
It’s not so you’re never, ever going to meet us again.”
Stretched out,
On a daycare cot.
Told to take a nap,
Didn't want to!
A lot!
I might miss something,
So didn't make a peep.
Closed my eyes and pretended to sleep.
Waited until they were gone,
Snuck out across the lawn.
Knew where my brother had gone.
Up the stairs,
Into his room,
The teacher was talking about the moon.
Slid underneath his desk,
His legs hid me from the rest!
Stayed there until I had to pee,
Thats what gave me away.
But I didn't take a nap today!
Written: February 23, 2024
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
If there are idiots in the room
Said the teacher, sarcasm in full bloom,
Silence stretched along,
Then a freshman stood strong,
To join you, sir, I'll hold elbow room.
The students all giggled and cheered,
As the freshman wit became premiered
With a smirk on his face,
He put him in his place,
A lesson in humor the class revered.
Amid a silent classroom,
A freshman broke through the gloom,
With a clever reply,
He caught everyone's eye,
A lesson in wit that made them all bloom.
The teacher, with a sneer on his face,
Asked the freshman to state his case,
Why not deem you a fool?
The kid said no hint school.
But hate to see you standing with no grace.
The class erupted in laughter and glee,
As the freshman words set them all free,
From the tension and stress,
Of the classroom's duress,
A lesson in wit that brought harmony.
This is a story about Barry Hunt
Who tried to pull off a remarkable stunt
He tried a bungee-jump without using a rope
He then fell to the ground the silly dope
And now his head is turned back to front.
He now sees everything from the back
Which often leads to a panic attack
Because now when he needs a poo
And he has to visit the loo
He simply just doesn’t have the knack
It’s even worse when he needs a wee
Because Barry can no longer see
His aim is so bad, which really makes him sad
Cos to get bullseye he would need a degree
This story of backwards boy Barry
Ends with him finally becoming happy
He then got a job as a teacher, which became a magazine feature
And now he was a celebrity chappie
With his eyes now on ‘the back of his head’
He could see what the children had said
Although there was no cure, he got awarded Teacher of the year
And he celebrated when his name was declared
Barry partied all day and he partied all night
He danced the ‘backward robot’ until it was light
Despite Barry’s backwards life, that night he met June his wife
and now Barry and June are doing alright.
THE DOLLAR STORE BUNNY
I chit chat with a saint at church
telling her how my grandson spent
Kindergarten online. This will follow
his class all the way through
to high school graduation.
His second grade teacher was happy -
the class advancing,
by leaps and bounds,
godspeed ahead. I tell her
how the Kindergarten teacher
adopted my grandson’s bunny as a pet.
She smiles, sparkling eyes and all, and
tells me about how her grandson threw
his bunny in the air, then it landed on
a light and burned up. Now, I surmise
that the saint’s bunny, like the Velveteen,
is a stuffed rabbit. I tell her my grandson’s
is real and we have a big laugh. She admits
that the flying bunny was purchased
at the Dollar Store - the poor, dearly departed.
5/21/2023
We had a most horrid schoolteacher,
And us children did all hate her,
She’d shout at us for no real reason,
And threaten to see us later,
She had a dip on a Florida trip,
And was swallowed by an alligator,
But only crocodile tears were shed,
‘Cos we were all just … gladiator!
My teacher who thought sun-bathing made her well-red,
graded me average, she was mean to the power hundred.
She was once a banker, but after some time lost interest,
wanted to be a pilot, her career could take off for the best.
She thought to be able to fly high, could be very uplifting,
instead she bought a boat, for it was for sail and tempting.
She an optimist, her blood type was B-positive, they stated,
but the doctor told it was Type-O, the mistake was corrected.
Her memory was photographic, but she couldn’t develop it,
she was to alter a brain part, changed her mind last minute.
When she stole neighbor’s lamps, he couldn’t be more de-lighted,
a picturesque girl, she landed in jail, “I was framed”, she asserted.
_______________
March, 5, 2023
Contest : Pun Fun
Sponsored by : Margarita Lillico
The world is too funny to be angry
What mr A deals with
Is same with what Mr B
Is dealing with
It might be in different ways
Or forms
Yet on same sense of survival
The both men battle differently
Cos their ways could be similar
But their approach to life differs
So this applies to all men out there
We all are fighting to breathe
We always have something to protect
Something to save
Something to care for
So God bless every real man
Cos I know the mysteries behind
A real man's smile
Real men don't smile in vain
They read meaning to reality
They see always the signs of the time
They don't need too much teacher
Cos they learn from life
And with time experience becomes
Their source to master their realities
Cos they know how hard life could
Get with no support
Respect to all real men out there
Please keep up your inspiring life style
You are the hero of humanity
You are the builders of what
The world enjoy with out gratitude
If you are a real woman
I know you feel me now
Support this men
Never let them die young
Cos they are your happiness
And they are one of the reason why
The world is too funny to be angry
I always enjoy at 4:15 PM
No matter where I’ve been
In my house
Backyard living room kitchen
The beep beep of the yellow school bus driver
As he rolls away through the neighborhood
With all those kids skipping jumping
And running home to be happy
The driver’s gentle toot toot reassuring them
The world’s still kind
How he makes the beep beep
Sound silly and muffled
I do not know
But it’s quite a skill
I think
To find the will
And the time to make
That little gesture
What a difference maker
A pat on the back that lasts a lifetime
Not only for all those wondrous kids
But for all the broken pain-filled people
Sad in their homes like you and me
Looking for a lift just once a day
From a yellow school bus driver
Waving and saying It’s all ok
See you tomorrow.
my friend cannot spell it is true
and was stuck on the word iq
when teacher did shout
before passing out
my library books overdue.
I do not see further meaning
behind the choice of word
To analyze this is demeaning
I think it is absurd
Whoever decided to write this
must of been high as a kite
If you want this class to be treacherous
stab me to make it a fair fight
The only thing less moving than poetry
is the clock up on the wall
Time is is no hurry
to set me free into the hall
My teacher tries to no avail
perhaps I’m unable to learn
Or maybe all poets are evil
and just want the world to burn
My teacher was not so good as yours seems to be,
His name was Goodwill and he taught us Chemistry.
He always wanted us to answer difficult questions,
And beat you strong if you cannot balance equations.
If you are late in class he'd twist and twist your ear
Until it falls to the ground and you'll pick it there.
He was so strong when he held you you'd wet your pants...
(He had gigantic hands I once gave him a compliment)
But a person can survive twenty four strokes I was the experiment,
Don't ever disturb Goodwill and give him a comment!
One time he held a student by the door
And twisted his ear till it fell to the floor.
I've never seen Goodwill apologize before
And he will never, for that I'm sure.
Five red pencils,
Fighing in the class.
First one said,
I am bigger than you are.
The second one said,
I am the strongest.
The third one screamed,
I write so well.
The fourth one interrupted,
Excuse me guys, I look so well.
The fifth one alerted,
Keep quiet, teacher is on the way.
Date of submission: 21/05/2021
The Wildcats was the mascot,
The elementary school just a couple of blocks away
I would walk to school hand in hand with my mother,
Waving goodbye as I disappeared through the gates.
The playground was huge,
Blacktop for miles and miles,
The swing set was my favorite,
Named it Henry, I would
Talk to Henry in my head,
He was always interested in what I had to say,
Whatever classroom tidbit I had to offer.
If someone cut their hand with a scissor,
Or if that kid made that teacher go red in the face again.
Henry would sit there, willingly,
As I tried to touch the sky with my tip-toes.