To the layman’s unlearned eye,
Parliment is just another cigarette
To I, the educated expert its an extension
Its a bayonet with the mouth of a
cannon
A filter’s recession made with such
adaptive intention
Dab the divot in the pile of Columbian snow
Raise it like a glass to any curious biff
Just a sniff, a bumpskie, a twitch of the nose
Fireworks in the membrane and off they go
Under the cloud of cigarette smoke, the expert walks
a road of elation for eight minutes or so
Those days have been behind me for a number of years
and no matter how often i say cocaine is an unremarkable drug
As I was a conisseur of hypnotics and downers
the memories of explosive speed and dread and fear
Yet some are so comforting, when I see a Parliment
my eye allows the escape of one yearning tear
I'M STILL HERE
IT ALL STARTED WHEN I WAS 10 YEARS OLD
I WAS MOLESTEDFOR 5 YEARS FROM MY DAD
AND RAPED BY MY BROTHER
BUT I"M STILL HERE
I HAVE BEEN BEATENWITH A TOW CHAIN
AND MY HOUSE WAS SET ON FIRE WITH ME IN IT
BUT I"M STILL HERE
I HAVE BEEN BEATENAND THROWEN THREW A BIG PICTURE WINDOW
AND WAS RIPED FROM ALL MY CLOTHES OFF
BUT I"M STILL HERE
I WAS RAPED ON SEVERAL ACCOUNTSBY MY MOM'S
BOYFRIEND AND HIS SON
BUT I'M STILL HERE
I HAVE HAD OVER 11 SURGERIES PLATES AND SCREWS
ALL DOWN MY RIGHT HAND SIDE
BUT I'M STILL HERE
I WAS SLIPPED DOWNERS IN MY DRINKS
AND ALMOST DIED
BUT I'M STILL HERE
I WAS BEATEN SO BAD BY MY HUSBAND THAT WHEN THE OFFICERS
TOOK ME TO WHERE MY BROTHER AND SISTERS CAMPSITE
THEY DIDN'T EVEN RECONGIZE I WAS
BUT I'M STILL HERE
I WAS VERBALLY ABUSEDON SEVERAL ACCOUNTS
AND SOMETIMES I THINK IT"S WORSE
BUT IM STILL HERE
THE REASON FOR THIS POEM IS NEVER GIVE UP
CAUSE IM STILL HERE
Unexplained encounters,
Undulating terrain,
I'm standing in the rain,
Hemmed by downers.
I find myself in a direction,
A way I know nothing about,
A route that's beyond discretion,
It's an everyday bout.
Where are the answers that I seek?
To unravel the mystery in my walk,
To refrain the hands of the enigma's clock,
Disperse the shadow that makes dawn bleak.
Dawn chauffeurs the unexplained,
Within me, these are curtained,
I'm saddled with the unseen,
None of these could be foreseen.
Everything I do not know,
To this, I do not yield,
I only utilize its vast field,
Keeping hope alive as I go.
March 12, 2023.
Writing Challenge - "K" Words - Poetry Contest,
Constance La France.
rotten molars unnerved her moribund hunger for living on
she extracted the pain with blunt scalpels pliers and hammer
damaged her smile as well but with the cornerstones removed
in the aftermath of destruction nothing was left but a stammer
loops of denial and self-incrimination established more pain
she tore her heart out under the shelter of drugs and booze
abuse self-incrimination and injustice festered in her mind
emoted a cardiac bypass for feelings leaving nothing to lose
a spiritual minefield exploded and she gathered rapid speed
performed a lobotomy with a manual and surgical precision
hysterical psychedelia and amphetamines furthered the cause
reached complete numbness from the screwdriver’s incision
only after all operations uppers downers and morphine failed
she realized that life was to seize no matter how it panned out
checked into rehab and abandoned jigsaw super glue and fear
took up painting and poetry and excised her vile needless doubt
25th September 2020
it hurt so much that she prised out the molar in despair
with a corner post missing pain oozed from wounded flesh
one cavity exchanged for another but rawness lay bare
she tried painkillers and sedatives then settled for hash
anguish hampered her feelings and she tore at her heart
until emotional turmoil pulsated in oblivion and voids
took a few more puffs from the reefer to make a start
to clean up her act but failed and reached out for opioids
dazed in a haze it appeared to work well for a short while
she pickaxed her mind and attempted to extract the root
of disorientation sorrow and evil but her mind remained vile
confused and drugged the remedy’s effects stayed rather moot
alcohol uppers and downers magic mushrooms and cocaine
followed her on the devastating road to full blown compulsion
whatever she tried she spread bedlam and became more insane
threw the drugs in the loo and looked back in fearful repulsion
21st September 2020
They shuffled as an angry group
Eyes averted, as if they were ashamed of themselves
My daughter never used to be like that
But she had been ushered in,
She acted like she was one of them
Her Pollyanna side rarely came out these days.
She was wearing dark eyeliners, and had painted her room black.
I had not heard of Goth yet, for it was only the middle seventies.
Her friends began hanging around, wordlessly, on my couch.
If I came into the room and tried to converse, they left.
So I came in the room quite often.
She had lost her way, so to speak.
I knew it, but we were new in town.
She was glad to have friends, even if they were posers.
We had moved a lot. She had given up much.
She needed them at this time,
For pretend friends were better than no friends at all.
I was relieved when she decided to trade them in for the service.
The day she joined the Air Force, I rejoiced,
Figuring this bunch of angry downers would not follow her.
I was right.
They didn’t.
After basic training, she began to smile again.
And she had new friends.
God works in mysterious ways.
I get it
I finally get it
It took a while
But now I'm showing my style.
To every home
With somber tone
My daily briefings
Broadcast my teachings;
I tell them all
To heed my call
So all may strive
To stay alive.
My change of tack
A stroke of luck
And just in time
The polls to climb;
For every day
I get my say
The ratings spike
With me on Mike.
Now the prime task
A real big ask
To find that cure
Something sure.
This virus sticks
All experts kicks
But as to me
Just watch and see.
I have a plan
Beat this I can
Wait for fine weather
To Covid tether.
Once that is done
They'll hail the man
Making things right
With wisdom and might;
Never a pause
Fighting the cause
Winning's my creed
I've proved that indeed.
Then all the vile doubters
The downers and shouters
Will finally see
Their champion is Me.
They're never wrong and always right
Though others may dispute this
For subjectivity prevents
Naysayers to refute this.
The way you feel is how you feel;
The trick is how you handle
The downers so their flames
Remain like those upon a candle.
For otherwise you'll lose control
And soon a conflagration
May spiral to a point where others
Feel some consternation.
So get a grip and take a breath
Although you might be reeling.
You may choose not to share the way
You are (correctly!) feeling.
My mind goes through all these stages
all these mental rages
it's a lost book with hidden pages
Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas
every drug done they call you courageous
this is a timeless past time that is ageless
so many drugs to do
which one will be the downfall of you
come on hurry and choose
they say you snooze you lose
uppers or downers mixed with booze
teenagers without a clue
they walk over their friend on the ground blue
at a raging party that they threw
could not believe what drugs do to you
the mental of someones mind they will chew
right through you too
sure you will be fine go ahead do another line
heart beats out your chest out your spine
America the land of the free or the land of the drugged up mind
more like the land of blind
so open your eyes and see what you find. -TA
A Fierce Clarity
Conundrums of doubt
dumb, dumb, dumb
downers with an excuse
to gulp the pill
wash down chemical
sweetener for the bitter palate of sugar
Grains of possession
miserable addicts of this technological freedom
bar-code a ticket to emancipation
cold blooded despots
placed in a box
vox-populi every opinion
A jailed perception
sees barbed-wires of need
must constrain the revolutionaries
and by poverty know less of greed
not by choice is survival
the only creed
So let fake news be the measure of hypocrisy
secret conundrum of dumb, dumb, dumb
the measure of stupidity
and by confused design
reorganize reality
devoid of God inside the response
Divine by any other word
yet in greatest torment
the devil works
creation beyond is on the far side of thoughts
beyond the created
and the ego of ants
to flesh delivers the arrogance
of governments.
7/25/17
In the ocean or among lumber
Survivalist and hunter
Rain and thunder
Above below and inside the bunker
An increase in hunger
During Winter and Summer
A roadrunner
Giving them a stone cold stunner
Like a hot knife through butter
Running smoothly or with a buffer
Bags full of downers and uppers
Getting older, not any younger
Awake or in slumber
Areas clean or filled with clutter
Closed and open shutters
Items kept, tossed or lost down the gutter
Having disinterest or wonder
Still unfound or discovered
A miss or swish whether or not wearing shorts made by no jumper
Dented and pristine bumpers
You are or aren't showing your true colors
Our Words have echoes that are for others to hear...
Words can be downers or uppers or they can fill others
with cheer.
What we say can have a lasting impact...
So chose your words carefully and speak them with tact.
Affirm and encourage those that are special to you...
During each day this could be one of the most important
things you do
Playing with fire can hurt and burn...
But speaking encouraging words can be a great habit
to learn.
Our words can burn if spoken in strife...
But in love, they can affirm and enhance someones life.
So let your words echo with a spirit of love...
And pray that they'll provide a witness of God's love
from above.
TK<
Slightly
High but
Broken from the
Inside, slowly drowning. Please
Help me learn to swim.
,Andrew Greening
Sexy ass ass, God
wonderful breast that make Virgin's love
so which ones?!?
you love those Debbie Downers!?!?
they might cut it off just to make it incomplete
you gotta be the best thing that happened to me
if you were a whore
I might take you off the cornerstone
and make cash with it instead of Ass Kissing
and I am the one YOU sex
in the symbol of a woman to make you feel flesh
Don't listen to rabbit
he ain't got love in which is like pleasure
Our pleasure is the best because our love connects
I love you dark hair
wheat field smile
cuz not even an Angel can reach it
and that my city
and you are the most beautiful so I'm snitching
Trolls roam the internet
Looking for prey to stalk
Dishing out the mockery
To harass users on forums.
Debbie downers of the net
Ready for a sneak attack
Spreading chaos and dispair
To bring down net-goers.
Think their all that?
Think their all tough?
Think their superior?
Top of the food chain?
Noses in the air?
I don't think so
Time to open your eyes
Because your inferior
Your just a herd of jerks.
We got something to say
So here's the news flash
You can just shove it
Put a cork in it
Lock it up tight.
Trolls have no feelings
Don't understand empathy
For others' emotions
They have no heart.
Trolls have no soul
Don't care about others
Just trying to be the big dog
Pushing around the puppies.
It's time to end it
End your charade
For you have no self-esteem
You pick on the weak
To make you feel strong.
If you don't got nothing
Nice you like to share
Then don't say nothing at all
We don't want to hear it.
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