The newborn peers around for the first time
The elderly peers around for the last time
Disorientation by birth
Disassociation by death
One moment you're high on the see saw
And the next it all comes crashing down
A high tide of emotion washes over you
But to you it's barely deeper than a puddle
Two young lovers share their first kiss
While two old lovers slowly let go
For every high is a low
For every hello is a goodbye
With each passing day we run out of time
Faces age and hair turns gray
And in the end we wonder where the time went
But if you can think that then know there is still time
Life is just a confusing dance of pain and pleasure
Eternity can be promised but is all too often fleeting
If you open your eyes your field of vision is limited
But if you close your eyes you can see everything
Disorientation by birth
Disassociation by death
But between these moments
Don't forget how to live
We are most wisely appreciated
and anticipated
in the press
of public fame
and the stress
of personal gain
Not
by the quantity
of our autocratic popularity
But
by the quality
of our democratic integrity.
In this peacefully pleasing warm regard,
perhaps we poignantly reconsider
Quantities are measured
by cognition performing
verbally recognized passions
while qualities are felt
through intuition engaging
preverbally connecting pleasures
Defaming risks of loss
emerge through systemic trauma
disassociation infamy
against opportunities to gain
through transformative
reassociation favored fame
Extensively requalifying
EarthMother's therapeutic potential
for democratic integrity.
STRAYED SHEEP
Today, we are all as strayed sheep
Once together, and of one mind
All have wandered and separated
Finding independence is overrated
Common values become conflated
To such a life, many are resigned
With different memories to keep
What is family, it’s a difficult question
All spread across the world we know
Linked merely by digital conversation
Different definition of a close relation
Who is really part of a congregation
Lifetime bonds are at an all time low
Popular activities the main congestion
Some may still remember the flock
A safety in numbers, a common goal
Yet by many, now often seen as quaint
Comfortable memories becoming faint
For some, group identity is a constraint
Over time, disassociation takes its toll
And finding oneself alone is a shock
standing in the rain again
in the rain again I stand,
next to the Finnish truck driver waiving with a wet newspaper
or maybe it's a card deck, hand looks like a duck's beak
from the radio "Satumaa" sounds like fruits falling from trees
rolling down on the patio to find a man and woman circling each other's bulb like bodies
and everyone has forgotten why it rains
we are surrounded by tango and dresses and unsteady hands on knee caps, nails tapping on guilt and minds too hazy to recall what a promise feels like
drops keep running down my neck
I long for a glass of whatever to lean my finger and thoughts against
Reijo Taipale will not be leaving the radio anywhere soon, and someone says "we are in a movie, feels like it, right? this is too real to be anything but"
no birds are singing anymore
wax like birches are standing heavy and empty against the quiet lake
where all the horses sometimes used to swim
the wooden boards will squeak when I leave.
Down by the pond,
you know, the one behind the bare hedgerow,
a pond dug out as a feature,
for condominiums to surround,
as if they just had to have,
a basic single nozzle fountain,
and an ornamental plastic swan
just to off-set the isolation
and disassociation
that comes with
the last urban hold-out
you will ever own or know.
Love is like fallen leaves
Elevated
With eastern warmth
We hug in spring.
*
my brain has its own life,
its own conversations,
never-ending circumlocutions
this confabulation of memory
leaves me unsure of
the reality of my thoughts
is this a chemical misstep,
a minuscule of glutamate
misplaced or missing
or is it a mistake in my
biological majuscules,
an A or a G gone awry,
leaving mental havoc in its wake
or perhaps just a wiring mishap,
a failing to bridge synapses to
the branched flourishes of dendrites,
leaving me thirsty for truth,
a truth now conflated with errata
can the brain heal itself,
restore effaced letters
to historiated initials
or will it descend into darkness,
gradually ceasing its conversations,
forgetting all spelling,
and become a silent grey cage
Struggling with this silent internal war. A smile on the outside today, is what I fixed and uncomfortably wore.
I felt like the bigger it got the more I could hide. Now only the universe and I can see the dismembered emptiness, that's falling apart from the Inside.
How can I blissfully sit in a room of smiling faces, when I know most of them are too, teetering on the brink of disassociation. We all pretend we are fine, but we have a master feast of feelings marinating for years within our own made up lies.
I am tired of being the sous chef for my own tragedies. I prep these emotional meals, and I store them away and for what a sick twisted pity party for only me?
I really got to start working out the muscles in my face, they need to learn to decipher a real smile from a fake.
I wonder if others notice their glue is slowly showing.
We have to remember you can only hide the stew that's brewing for so long until it starts overflowing, so season your insides with things that make your feeling pot feel full. Also, don't over season feelings you are aware are no good.
Disassociation
Am I fixable?
Followed instructions
Like a leaking faucet Resembling what remains broken
Causing built up droplets to overflow
Drowning
Time is rusted
Disintegrating
Mold forms over what once sold as stainless steel
Can someone fix me?
My mind is in confusion
I think there's been an intrusion.
The things I see are just an illusion
and I am seeking a solution
Before I'm overwhelmed with emotion.
In my mind, there's a combination
of possession
of obsession
of aggression
Something has blurred my vision
and has lowered my ambition
I don't know right now if this is a confession
it's been a while since our last short session
But, I believe there's been a deviation
and a disassociation
*Stop all communication.
*There has been a breach in the information.
*Alternative initiation.
*New determination.
*Protocol transition.
System reboot: New variation
/: No more distraction
Subject isolation
/: No more frustration
Lose passion,
Lose affection,
Lose foundation.
System configuration
New partition.
Other personality integration.
Could not delete all old files, system malfunction.
Conclusion
Now I am an amalgamation of silence and communication.
an accumulation of inattention and consideration.
a combination of relaxation and agitation.
articulation of imagination and exaggeration.
So, what's your recommendation?
Duality which is in motion must be stilled
If we would observe singular reality within
Muddied waters need to be distilled
Only when the mists clear, may meditation begin
Perpetual motion of body, senses & thought
Grooves of habit having huge momentum
Repressed subconscious fears & desires, which we forgot
Are all our nemesis resident in the egos sanctum
Without stopping that which is in motion
Negativity may yet be abdicated
By disassociation
In four easy steps to a consciousness elevated
Contemplation
Acceptance
Transformation
Transcendence
Four effortless steps to permanent wellness
Of which only the first two we need to walk
The last two bestowed by the Universe in stillness
So simple, so easy, yet strangely we balk!
02-November-2020
Cessation of thought ego begot, gradual graded disassociation from fear & desire precipitation, we hollow out mind-body from cravings & urgings shoddy, even as divine magnetism within persists we be to become a bliss mist, until ceasing to weigh & size we simply vaporise!
How to calibrate
Attention distillation
There is no one here
“All the world’s a stage, And all the men and women merely players; They have their exits and their entrances, And one man in his time plays many parts.” William Shakespeare
high fashion climbs the ladder of
artifice, advertising, allure
unrestrained composition by
designer, model, photographer
create an image with power
to heal, change, inspire
bright lights, illumination
flare, freedom, flair, fun
set the consumer's eye
for imagination, industry, impulse
high fashion also climbs a ladder of
disassociation, defiance, desire
appealing to a variety of audiences
Immerse under waves
of zealous moonlight
adverse winds nippiness breath;
brings to ponder
ceaseless hope and wonder.
The lioness child me,
echo nostalgia deep feelings
and sensual dreams
though,
ardent constitution
grows dull and in
disassociation.
The lioness child me,
obscure abode
there is no day or night,
no moon or sun
reaching nature's
sweeping meadows.
7/17/2019
My dreams include hope, love, and peace.
They echo in my lioness heart and mind daily.
My constitution can barely stomach the hatred
I feel and see and the disassociation I feel from the others
Wanting to unite them with joy and enthusiasm
When they are a daily echo of differentiation
I want our nation to settle down amicably
Remembering that we are all Americans
Whether we welcome new masses to our abode
or not, should not keep us from being our
kind, wonderful, sexy, sensual, best selves.
Let’s be the United States we thought we were
a short time ago. Nothing has changed that will
not change again. We need to rise up to our name.
The UNITED states…
Written: 7-9-2019
Contest: Another Eight Word Poetry Contest
Sponsor: Kai Michael Neumann
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