Not one for getting my self jinx
With many feelings the excitement
How you think, feel never interlinks
Boy the moments of disapointment
Those times when your heart sinks
Because of the overwhelmment
Yes that is what really then stinks
No real sense of enlghtenment
When trusting your gutt instincts
Not going against your -
better judgment
Something that me now thinks
That would be a real improvement
Old idea from poem 2014 did know where was going with this one written 2021
In the midst of my sorrow, there's still hope for tomorrow,
In the midst of my pain, there's still healing to gain,
In the midst of my plan, God's designing a better one,
In the midst of my disapointment, there's hope for new appointment
In the midst of my mistake, there's still more to appreciate
In the midst of my embarrassment, God kept me through that moment
In the midst of my divorce, God's designing a new course
In the midst of my trial, I know, it's only for a while
In the midst of my accident, my recovery is soon evident,
In the midst of my existence, there's always hope for fulfillment
You remind me in your words, Thank you Lord!
At one point in my life i was an artist
I used to paint and draw
Covering a piece of paper
In beautiful colors
And my art told a story
The sort of story you couldn't talk about
I used to go to school every day
Showing up late
Wasn't something I'd do
But i dropped out
Leaving my education behind
I played the bass guitar
In a band called
The Nocturnal
My fingers ran against that bass
Pure magic
The sound of the gods
Setting out to destroy the world
Pure Punk straight from Seattle
At one point i was clean
Sober and pure like a new born baby
Falling further into
What you now call
"disapointment"
Screwing up my veins
with every shot of herion
Killing my brain cells
With every joint i smoked
Clogging up my nose
With every pill you could have known
I used to write lyrics
About my life
My childhood
I used to write journals
The ones you read in the book
that was published of me
I got up on that stage every night
As i was
Nothing fake
Nothing glamourous
Only a few scars
One shot of heroin
Come as you are
The words only speak for
Themselves
She proudly displayed her Double D size
But the boys were in for a big surprise
Bob copped a quick feel
Found they were not real
What a disappointment for all the guys...
SWEET MISTAKES
i sit here and think
of all i've done wrong
the whispering remnents
of a long ago song
while tragic decissions have created the past
the character built
a lays new path
without mistakes, goals can't be reached
if the the world was perfect
there'd be nothing to teach.
we'd never explore our souls and our minds,
never know strengths that are built over time.
the wonder and awe that we see all around, without essence and knowledge
would shrival and drown
love and contentment could never be felt
by a heart, that has never, disapointment been dealt.
mistakes may seem bad, like the end of the world but without them our souls would never grow and unfurl
As I close my eyes I linger slowly to sleep.
As I fall into this world of dreams.
I see you face once again.
There you are once more in my arms as we dance.
Your lips press softly upon mine as the passion flares.
Once more our song plays in the background.
Once more I sweep you off your feet.
So light as we dance upon the floor.
Our eyes meet the song comes to an end.
I place a rose in long beautiful hair.
Your smile is like a gift that warms my smile as it spreads upon your face.
Your eyes change color from the glare of the moon as they shine.
To hear your heart as it sings in a loud song as I melt.
Once more a kiss upon your lips before I awake.
But to open my eyes an realize its too late.
Waking up in disapointment to see you aren't by my side.
To only cry and wish I still had you here.
Looking upon the past,
Falling deeper and deeper,
Into a dark abyss.
Trying to forget,
All the disapointment
That has once occured..
As it all shrinks me down,
I fall faster,
Deeper, Harder,
All to fast.
But everything happens for a reason...
For I'd like to think.
-
I looked across the night club and saw a beauty in a little black number
A most perfectly set scar of 2 inches on her left temple
Almost required to add to her gorgousness and black hair
Pearls swaying and playing with them as she talks and smiles and smiles
Looks directly and looks away quickly- Not interested
Disapointment to me but I can't stop looking.
20 years younger but I still can't stop looking
Milk white skin rouged to perfection I grab another look
It's all in my mind those 20 years regret but I don't going over
But my disapointment is really not with her but with one so long ago
SWEET MISTAKES
i sit here and think
of all i've done wrong
the whispering remnents
of a long ago song
while tragic decissions have created the past
the character built lays new path
without mistakes, goals can't be reached
if the the world was perfect
there'd be nothing to teach.
we'd never explore our souls and our minds,
never know strengths that are built over time.
the wonder and awe that we see all around, without essence and knowledge
would shrival and drown
love and contentment could never be felt
by a heart, that has never, disapointment been dealt.
mistakes may seem bad,
like the end of the world
but without them our souls
would never grow and unfurl.
Laying here in bed,
thinking about what lies ahead.
My past was nothing but mistakes, regret, and disapointment.
I can only wish that my future holds nothing but excitement.
I sencerily hope that my future is better then my past.
Please, let the laughs, smiles, and good times come at last.
Everyday I'm trying to forget what should already be left behind.
But for some reason, it's constandly weighing on my mind.
I can't help but think that my past will catch up with my future,
but maybe people will see that all this has done is made me mature.
Its strange the quivering feeling that you get when evil vilians enter your sprit
Its quiet unexplanable and unmanagble and unpredictable
How things work out and sprout and shout bout Things that dont make much sense
Hense the thought
That I bought one''s love
With the coins from my heart
But atlast it passed
With much chillyness
I am a witness to the disapointment my heart feels
As it beats
But bears a whole I once drilled
A whole that I must re-open to show them
That im pure
And that i''m not perfect
But i''m the angle you have never seen before
And the love you have rendered me lost
With out a single map to find my way to you
Has left me with no clue
But left me in a mentle and emotional battle feild
But due to the fact my physical congress has not sentance these to major country''s of my
being to was its a conflicked
You are my conflicked....but I injoy every minute of it!!!!
my heart fell as my eyes slowly adjusted...
to his small frame
had he always been so ugly
so short, so ungroomed?
Why must you be fake
Today is the day of giving
But yet you take
Some people choose to bring yet you to steal
You take the most precious things: time, money, sleep, happiness
What are you? Who are you? To take something so precious and feel no remorse
You give no time to think
You shot within seconds of sight
No time to realize that today might be the last
A fact that the world itself cannot grasp
Yet I accept you with open arms
I always do!!!!
Never to say no
Never to let go
Purely with good intentions, I let you in
No metal detectors, no fear, clear as the blue ocean
I let you in my home, my soul, my heart
I cannot give it all to you, you just don'y get it
Stop taking
Now all the trust and all the pain
All the disappointment! Lies! Fear! Has all gone to my head?
I hate you!
My doors are closed, my heart is closed, and my mind is closed.
You are not wecome!
Shyly Loudly
Smiling Laughing
in the face of
Disapointment
Go Go
Little stuffed
Friend, open
Your arms
I'll cry
You'll hug the bad and
It will all
Go Away!
Dedicated to my mother. She insists that Teddy Bears make life bearable!
Winter comes around once each year,
It’s a time for laughter, joy and beer.
The end of the seasons. Or is it the beginning?
Well to me it’s the end of disapointment
And the start of cold times to come.
No shelter for me,
No family.
Just on my own looking in,
Looking in the window, staring at the warmth of your fire
As your oh so perfect family sit around the table,
Oh what a joyous occasion.
But me....I still sit and hope, pray that i won’t be on my own.
Lonely forever.
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