How would anyone deal with depressive loneliness
when even the dreariest thoughts allow great fear?
Hiding in that lonely world seems right for some,
having nothing is giving up everything even love;
choose joy or pain, dance alone or drink a beer:
see others indulge in happiness, refill your glass!
How useless is believing in miracles,
they only happen to the lucky ones;
anyone showing that hopeless mood
can't achieve any goal feeling brood!
I have often delt with loneliness overwhelmed by distress:
wasn't I smiling when all was quickly tumbling down,
keeping it to myself, laughing harder than a clown?
Don't hold anything inside, reach out and confide in others!
I envied anyone who had someone to live for, to laugh with?
Wasn't it too wrong to be denied the right to love and smile?
Was I kept from many wishes staring at stars and not wish on one?
Who believes that we are chosen by fate to be marthyrs from birth?
In my dream, I saw an angel, Whose smile lit up the room. As the figure walked toward me, I noticed a dagger embedded in its chest, slowly bleeding.
The angel began to cry in pain, And the suffering grew worse. Blood flooded the scene, As the angel's cries turned into desperate screams.
The pain was so unbearable, The angel didn't know what to do.
It wept uncontrollably, Tearing at its own face and clawing at its skin, blood covering its once-pure form.
Slowly, the angel began to transform, Its radiant features fading into something dark and sinister. An evil presence emerged from the torture, As the angel's innocence was consumed by the agony.
The next time you cry,
Acknowledge the warmth of those salty tears upon your cheeks.
That is what it is to be alive.
To have,
To had.
The moment.
I assure you in those lonely moments,
You will feel how strong you are,
How resilient.
You can survive this life,
If only,
You Acknowledge
Manic depressive
3 cups of coffee to keep me awake, astray the train of my thoughts.... Far away, have it your way.
Blue the state of my emotions, like a blue baby please medicate me into a state of meditation.
2 packs of Marlboro to ease the pain, refrain from shame and maybe yes today l feel less insane, though the voices in my head mute, their echoes still vibrate.
1 Heineken into the twilight, l feel so alive, nostalgia as the Phill Collins record spins over and over again like the euphoric state l am in right now, the manifestation of trance music and the mellifluous touch of ecstacy, this is paradise... Nimbus please take me home.
One too many pills, moist the state of my heart, cloudy yawn as lethargy takes over my body, slowly drowsing my stamina...
Dreamland, the irksome journey begins again.
Things changes…
Those lights fade down,
With suicidal thoughts.
Unknown voices heared,
Pains being beared.
People may look strong,
But, what about those weak,
Weeping child of past.
I don't think that
Dark circles and wrinkles,
Are the markers of depression.
Some times a beautiful mask,
Hides everything behind.
But hope never changes,
Everything will be fine soon.
Dancing prancing
cry cry cry
Whirling twirling
die die die
Up on the roof top
Laughing with maniacal glee
Saddest moment ever
Keeping this to myself, as you can see
Shopping, buying everything in sight
Wishing someone would unplug me
Or turn out the light
Life of the party, collecting strangers all around
Falling fast, and hard, maybe to never again
Fully be found.
Dancing prancing
Cry cry cry
Bi-polar fun.
Why? Why? Why?
Trump Paranoid and Manic Depressive
By Trump everyone has been annoyed;
Highly paranoid and we want to avoid;
Disaster like Titanic;
Depressive and manic;
Absence from White House will be enjoyed.
Jim Horn
Depressive Which Was Manic
My kind of depression had been manic;
Already considered doing another antic;
Screeching halt,
And my fault;
Broke big button that they labelled panic.
Jim Horn
Should I not awake after tonight,
may my death find me the peace I never found in life.
So it is, I am back again
Woken from the deepest sleep
That yesterday consumed me whole
Today, the fog has lifted
Twenty fours hours make a difference
To take a man out of the shadow
A thousand moments passing
Blink of an eye to the universe
Where as I lay deflated
This morning, rage on victorious
Songs now pour from my heart
Gone, the thick black tar
Sunlight felt a burden
Now I surf its rays
Bird call that was once grating
A weight has shifted
So it is, I am back again
But for how long I ask
If tomorrow I slip under
Accept, the Yo-Yo of the Depressive
Excessive and Depressive
If my ego attempts and tries to attack
Yours must try to give it some slack
When you discover it has been disturbed
My poor behavior should stop and be curbed.
Egos are roused as they become depleted
Constantly in conflict when not completed
Searching for some place to end up and go
While it will expand and continue to grow.
Unless they can come up with a cure
My manic ego must have to endure
Am so sorry when it becomes excessive
And result of emotions were all depressive.
James Serious Mysterious Horn
Retired Veteran
PS. Last one for the morning.
How many have I written so far
and what is easiest way to account
for total number of poems?
If I skip sleep and skip my med's tonight
against my doctor's warning, I'll soon hear
the strident voices trumpet loud and clear,
unnerving me,--trust me, it's no delight!
When I'm bipolar I fail to comply
and manias become fearfully near
'til I'm committed three times ev'ry year;--
it's a pain that puts my life on standby.
Life with my ups and downs can be frantic,
a crucible, a challenge, and a test;
at times this mad disease makes me panic
with madness, brilliance, and profound unrest
so frightful; (O God, help me when I'm manic!)
alas, its curse is rapture that's unblest!
The Manic Depressive Cycle
I breathe into my lungs and soul,
The wind beneathe the bright blue sky.
My spirit stares into the sun,
And burns its passion on my mind.
Through unseen tears I watch myself,
Speak lines drawn from a comic play.
From dark warm depths I tear my heart,
And place it, bleeding, on your tray.
Darkness surrounds me
I reside in a black cloud
That brings me closer
To death descending into
a dungeon I can't escape
as i stand here against my back
i remind you of the times you fail
i rest my head into my hands
so i can listen to your hell
and when your finished i tip my hat
and challenge the stories you tell
i guarantee it gets worse than that
if you feel the way i feel
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