Custom Made Poems

fancy dancy rooster cha cha cha

Fancy dancy rooster with a cha cha cha
Strumped up like a prancy peacock, with a fah lah lah
Suit jacket was custom made by Dior himself, of course.
Daisies on the lapel are much too much said the horse.

The barnyard was messy with manure and stuff.
Fancy dancy rooster got splashed, stalked off in a huff.
Acts like a male peacock too, a peahen said.
The hens agreed that everything went straight to his head.

Dirty Games

He hit the ball and run  

Aiming for a touch down 

But the wind is carrying his shoe 

that was custom made to fit his feet for the game  

The dope is sewed up in his gum 

And that is what gave him the final home run 

Your team is weak, you ambition is cheap 

But destiny will reveal your secret  

I have thought hard and long,  

How you became the champion 

You fire the coach, you meddle in dirt 

 And you cheat your way to the top 

But destiny will put you straight to the back 

The other team is a better team you

And I hope that their dreams will come through 

You have disgraced your devoted team

To fulfill your political dreams 

you have no talent and you issue unfair judgement

And you have zero knowledge about everything 

your strategy is deceptive and agonizing

You might win the game  

but your dignity is covered in shame 

Stop playing dirty games.

Lord BPC McBeel

He is a gentleman, refined and gentile.
A snappy dresser, Lord B.P.C. McBeel.
Look at his brocade suit, custom made of course.
His enormous steed is elegant for a horse.

Lord BPC McBeel did not look like a lizard at all.
He was low to the ground, but he came off tall.
His Dior fashion sense and his orange cravat tie
Showed us all that he was one GQ guy.

Dreams of An Alter Ego

I make a perfect dry martini,
I read and write and speak Français,
All my suits, and shirts, and shoes are custom-made.
I own a Porsche and Maserati,
A house on Acapulco Bay
With scores of floors of marble tile that's all inlaid.

I have a staff to fetch and carry,
My every wish is their command,
If I drop things, I just leave them where they lay.
All I need do is snap my fingers,
Someone's always close at hand,
And they look after Señor Jim in every way.

I host the most elaborate soirées,
They're in society's upper niche,
On my birthday and, of course, on New Year's Eve,
Where the hoi polloi and high-born
Mingle with the nouveau riche,
And they're all the better for it when they leave.

This all may seem a bit pretentious,
And I don't mean to self-inflate,
For wealth and fame, of course, do not equate with happiness,
But in my dreams my alter ego
Will oftentimes exaggerate
And make seem real what, to be sure, is pure "b..s".

Look Out

Big Bertha wore a custom-made silk bra 
    When hubby first saw her, he was in awe
                 On their very first date,
                He was in a dazed state
She decked him with one huge boob in the jaw














05/12/2023
Contest: A Funny or Bawdy Limerick 
Sponsor: Tania Kitchin

Abscess

Simple squamous epithelium
That lines the frothing orifice
Of politicians and wine-soaked braggarts

Cytoplasm
That flows equally
In justice and infectious regurge

Genes
That transplant the ghastly
Pale-light abscess of custom-made drivel

God, Ph.D.,  you too?

Happy and Complete

John had a favorite reading chair 
near the corner of the room
angled towards the fireplace 
with a tall lamp light 
set at just the right height
padded with his wife's 
embroidered cushions by his side
and a custom-made ottoman under his feet
John sat there looking happy and complete.

Meeting Silver Princess

Silver princess was a regular maid from the valley
By day, a woman who was unassuming and kind
By night she was a super hero, storming the alley
Looking for thugs and rapists with an evil mind

We had heard of her of course, but thought she was a myth.
Until someone called us to Toby’s Street forthwith.
She was there in the flesh, dressed in armor on fire.
Built like a soldier, her smoldering look was quite dire.

Her legs rose forever from boots custom made.
She was obviously as dangerous as a croc from the glade.
I could not make eye contact; for she was intimidating as heck.
Some of the other soldiers did a quick genuflect.

Silver princess is real! How can this be? Asked my cousin Sid. 
He did not believe she wore a cod piece either, but she certainly did.
I have never in my life met a more dangerous woman, ready to fight.
I cannot get her out of my head, trying as hard as I might.

My Birthday Presents

Here is what I got for my birthday.
Small glass holder for paint water. Won’t hold a paint brush.
Given to me by a non-painter.
Custom made apron.
Large and medium paint brushes.
Canvases.
Paint pallets.
Paints.
Peach shirt that says “Live your Dream”
Blue hair dye you can spray on to be more punk.
Large jar of jalapeno peppers.
Medium jar of jalapeno peppers.
Bathroom stuff I will never use.
Shower bombs I have already tossed.
Brownies, peanut butter fudge, rocky road fudge, watermelon
Candy bar, pecan pie, chocolate pie, apple pie,
cherry pie, key lime pie, lemon pie, coconut pie,
Did you know that when you eat out and say it’s your birthday
You get free pie
And no one checks your ID?

Today I'Ll Be Thankful

Today will be a good day.
I won't complain and moan,
About all that I do not have,
Count curses all alone.

Instead I'll count my blessings,
Thank Him for what is mine,
Appreciate what He has done,
To make my life sublime;

For others do not have the things,
That I just take for granted,
Good food, good clothes, a place to live,
It's really as I planned it.

Though everything is not the way,
I'd have it, truth to tell,
He's satisfied my every need,
Most Wants supplied as well.

I have all that I really need.
I really can't complain.
Though some have more, it's still just fine,
For we aren't all the same.

We each are blessed according to ,
What's best for you and me.
It's personal and custom made,
For personalities.

Today I will appreciate,
All He has done for me;
For home, and health, and happiness,
For my security.

On a Lovely, Festive Summer Day

The willow sways in the breeze
       Flowers emerge from their leaves
     Forest creatures come forth to play
       It's a lovely, festive summer day

     Inside my home's another story
       In family quarrels there is no glory
     Why can't my own siblings see
       Today is custom-made 
                            ~ the world agrees

The Power of a Dream

It's easy for the things we want to just be put aside.
The things we've always dreamed of put on hold and left to ride,
Until some time, some future date we hope will come to pass,
And the dream becomes reality not just a dream at last;

But time slips by and other things can over cloud our dreams,
And slowly they just slip away, become forgotten schemes.
But dreams can give us purpose, the power to start improving.
A dream can give us energy, the will to get things moving.

Don't lose the power of the dream.
It helps you to accrue,
The things to make things happen,
And it's custom made for you.

Eternal Crutch

We all sin 
I sin 
You sin 
Everyone is a sinner 

A sin is a sin is a sin
There’s no way to win 

Your actually guilty before you begin 
So how do you actually get a reprieve? 

To acquire the salvation 
You wish to receive

The game is rigged 
And not in your favor 

What depravity may I offer you?
What’s your flavor?
 
Many choices to be had 
Mix and match your wickedness 
Custom made immorality for the mad 

Smoke, drink, inject and snort 
Can I have some more? Is the retort 

Mind numbing at it’s best 
Gimme, Gimme, Gimme,
No time to rest 
Gotta get high 
I must confess 

My blanket
My shield
My sanctuary 

Sobriety is quite contrary 
To my goal 
Of being numb, dumb, and resistant to succumb 

So, don’t bother trying to save me you fool
The drugs are my tool 
And reality is my school 

Follow the line of the diseased mind 
You may find it to be kind 
If not, a monotonous grind 

Welcome to the cognitive bind

Eric (and sometimes not)

I Called Her My Baby Doll

I called her my baby doll, because I knew she would like it.
She smiled at me, but did not say a word.
Giving me no nickname, which made me sad.

You are my darling, I told her. I love everything about you.
Even my tattered and torn nightie? She asked me.
Hinting that she wanted another one.

Her head was so big, the dress had to be custom made.
My mother was sewing it with Velcro snaps
Because how else could we get it over her enormous head?

I kept this a secret, because her birthday was a week away.
We went to the river and she said “Drown me please”.
I thought this was weird, but I did what she wanted.

She came up all full of water but she did not die.
Baby dolls do not die, I told her. They have birthday parties.
We were together almost forever until a dog ate her head.

Candlestick

Self
standing, solus
candle, ushering
baptism prayer
gifting loved ones
sacred life,
a promise to
always be
there.
|
|
guide deceased on their journey,
witness teary eyes, turn blurry

watch over eulogy speech,
offering authentic peace

vibrant, fiery complexion
wavering hue protection,

assisting ghost invitations
observe vital declarations,

seal high status documents
letters, scrolls, for the president

crimson, custom made stamps
back when candlesticks lit lamps,

religion exchange light for money ~
honour souls, lost down on one knee

centrepieces chaperone romance,
Capturing a tender glance

scented aromatherapy
meditation, calm, serenity

comforting memorial shrines
befriends a glass of blush wine,

sheen lustre uplifts sorrow ~
hope for a brighter tomorrow

• Short Custom Made Poems
• Famous Custom Made Poems
• Best Custom Made Poems
• Read Custom Made Poems
• Long Custom Made Poems
• Custom Made Quotes