Best Professor Poems

There once was a nutty professor

          Who felt he was so much the lesser

                    He mixed in...

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Professor Paddock of virology was a stocky man
            He observed a little beetle on the skirt of Messy Anne
               ...

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The professor turned to me
       What is infinity?

     ‘Neither the stars in the sky
       nor the sand next the sea’
         thought...

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'Twas the night before Christmas and outside was blizzardly
Mrs Claus was busy hanging baubles on the Christmas tree
Santa felt cold and shivery and was succumbing to the flu
And told Mrs Claus "I'm feeling ill, what am I going to do?".

She was giving it some thought...

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not only a few times
had I sketched
the pattern of your smile
in every swaying leaf
in every waning moonlight
in every wandering clouds
blowing softly to the west

but I ,
I couldn't sketch
the pattern of the wonder
in your deep brown eyes
and the secret sigh
you gently cast away
when you asked me...

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My beloved friend and esteemed professor, 
     is it so wrong to worship and admire
you with so warm and glowing a splendor,
     which is unbounded with heartfelt desire?
Your silhouette is my Achilles's heel,
    ...

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The title of this talk today,
"Win-Win Politics of New Feminist Economics"
suggests questions,
more than emasculating 
definitively deductive
reductive
answers.

Would you imagine
a minority-identified Buddhist,
more likely as a feminist?
or culturally comfortable
with political and economic Left-brain domination,
monotheistic competing for all-consuming
ritualistic servicing?

How would you compare broad cultural trends
between East and West theology
on...

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Limericks croisés : Once a Mother Professor and Daughter
      
     for Farid & Zafir

Once (a) Mother Professor and Daughter
Came to Paris to see a Poet Mister
He took them on a lope
From Opera* to Procope*
Till their feet...

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Polishing our mind is one of your goals
Assist not only students but people around you
Unfold our minds into reality,
Lighten our spirits to dream and pursues more.

Just any other man you are full of sense of humor
Outside the class you are like a father to us,
Strengthen...

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Professor Gorey
always had a story
filled wit guts and grim
til most folks around these parts
those with their full share of smarts
asked her where she grows her monolithic glory.

Grim Reaper
is not my heart's keeper
and I thank you so for asking
just what I see as our life tasking,
to...

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Mixing a little potion here and there
Something strange is stinking
Why did they buy Luke that chemistry set?
What on earth where they thinking?
 
Nothing good can come of it
There will be trouble down the road
It is only a matter of time
Before we hear something explode
 
Luke...

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Thick glasses and buck teethed
bumbling, insecure, nerdy and meek
he got many laughs
blowing up his class
teaching chemistry with two left feet

Julius was tired of being prudent
wanting to attract his female student 
so he drank his potion
feeling new emotions
becoming Buddy who was confident

Buddy Love was a suave...

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At the top of the stairs there's a musty room
Full of curiosities weird and rare:

Seashells,
Hummingbird nest,
A globe of all the world,
A two-headed snake kept in a jar,
Newspapers from near and far,
Pinecones,
Octopus,
Drawers and drawers of butterflies,
A fossil rock,
Radio,
An ancient arrowhead,
Many, many books are there, just waiting...

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The Senile Chemistry Professor

By Elton Camp

On retirement old Doc did belong
But he stayed at the job too long

Although his students it did amuse
When ionic and covalent he’d confuse

Carbon in organics is never found
To them had a very strange sound

The dean didn’t know what to say
But...

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I decided I had had enough.
I felt put upon, and I was mad, and I was not going back to the counseling program.
I was only a year in, and there was no way I was going to put myself in this predicament another year.
It was...

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